How To Live Life And Be Good At It.

It was a fun ride......

2011-12-14T11:49:00.000-07:00

I honestly don't know where that phrase came from, but, the last 5 1/2 years have been interesting. Alas, I have finished. I have raced the good race, and finished. I definitely didn't come in first, but I didn't come in last. I now have officially finished all required course work for my Bachelor's degree!!

I really don't know how to feel about this yet. It's kind of an indescribable feeling, and anyone that has experienced this knows what I'm feeling.

What's next? Well, theoretically I'm supposed to start looking at grad schools.....I'm just not sure how it will happen. Grad school is EXPENSIVE, and, my grades just aren't even anything anyone would take a second look at. Hopefully if I do well on the GRE, things will turn out for the best and I can get in somewhere.

For now, for the moment, I am HAPPY! I am proud of myself and this accomplishment! Things will fall into place, I know they will. They always do. But for now, YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Remember that time?

2011-09-20T15:04:00.003-06:00

Remember that time I used to be good at blogging? Then the school year ended, and I stopped. Like I do every summer? I guess that wasn't really a time, it just happened again. This could be an epic problem come December....why? BECAUSE I'M GRADUATING!!!

Yes. Me. Unbelievable right? Well I know for sure I didn't do it getting straight A's, but I passed all my classes and that's all that matters. Well for this stage at least. Which brings me to my next problem. The real problem. Grad school.

I'm going to be honest. I will be graduating, from BYU, with a cumulative GPA of 2.6 I really don't understand why school has been so difficult for me, but alas, it has. I know from talking to others currently in grad school, for Speech Language Pathology, that most schools require a minimum of 3.0 to get in. I suppose I could have retaken some of the classes I didn't do the best in, but now that BYU has changed their retaking policies, I didn't feel it would be worth it. Especially if I didn't do much better, which is likely. Maybe I don't believe in myself enough, or maybe I didn't study good enough, but it is what it is. All I know is for now, graduating is going to be exciting and something i'm looking forward to.

On other fronts, I still live at home. Is it a bad/good thing? I'm not sure. I do feel like me being there has been beneficial for various reasons, not even particularly my own needs/satisfactions. I feel like I've grown closer to my parents and come to recognize a bit more of who they are what they mean to me. Sappy right? I started a new job this summer at Convergys. Yeah, another call center job, which I don't love, but honestly I'm not hate either. I'm working graveyards, Wednesday-Sunday 11:30 pm-8 am. That's not the best, but it's really slow and I have plenty of time to do what I want (within reason) and can do my homework as well. It's not a career, just something to get me through this semester until I can find something better.

Dating. Well, let's not go there. Cuz, it isn't going on. Sometimes I THINK it/something is going on, but yeah, it's just me and my mind pretending it is. Oh well. someday right? I would go into specifics, but I honestly just don't feel like talking about the lowness that is my dating life.

Well that's about it right now. I will try to write more. Even though my blogs are boring. I guess that's about how my life sums up at this point. But that's ok, life doesn't have to be exciting all the time.

One Year. Wow.

2011-04-28T22:10:00.002-06:00

One year has passed since this all began. I guess technically you could say it began the end of March, but April 28th, 2010 was when I was wrongfully fired. I've commented and posted a few times this past year about things I've learned, but even still it was still quite a depressing ordeal I went through. However, I'm definitely in a better place in my life than I was a year ago, which makes me feel happy about how things went down.

Here's to another year of better-ness!!!!

Almost There

2011-04-13T09:30:00.004-06:00

Finals has never done this to me:

The way I see it, you go through the semester, go to class, take tests, write papers, turn in assignments, and it is all SUPPOSED to culminate at the end with the final exam. I find the majority of teachers these days, whether from the goodness of their hearts, or laziness, I find it much easier to get through finals when the exams are equally weighted. Aside from that, being a Senior...well basically a super senior, finals don't stress me anymore. In fact, this semester all i can think of is this.......

Hopefully, as long as everything works out as it should, no, WILL, I will be at a beach similar to this in Florida before too long. Almost THERE!!!!

Unexpected Pleasantries And Pensativaries

2011-03-24T09:21:00.003-06:00

You know, sometimes life comes at ya and there isn't a lot you can do about it. I got fired almost a year ago, and while that sucked........royally.........it was the best thing that could have happened to me at that time. It spurred change, much needed change, that I otherwise wouldn't have made on my own. I move home, Austin comes home from his mission early due to medical problems, and there I was to help out and support. I got a new job, but 6 months later I decided to quit mainly because I wasn't going to work Sunday's anymore. My school schedule has been pretty hectic this semester, but luckily I have good parents who were willing to support me (as far as food and rent go) by letting me live at home, free of charge. I get a temporary job, helps with some gas money and other small things, and holds me over. So through all the ups and downs, there are definitely blessings.

Jump to tax season, which is right now. I had been waiting for my 1099 for the Vespa I won a year ago, but the dang record label (where it should be coming from), hadn't sent it yet, and I was running out of money. Fast. I owed my Mom for 4 months of cell phone ($284), hadn't paid my Health insurance yet ($224), and well I didn't want to have a bank account on empty. So I said screw it, I made almost nothing last year, I've made multiple requests for them to send me the 1099, and it was time. It's a blessing not being claimed anymore, and being a student. All I know is, blessings come in many forms and sometimes it's something you never expected. With the more than triple amount of what I was expecting in return, I've been able to pay off everything I needed and still have an abundance left. Not having money the last two months really helped me learn how to NOT spend, and now that I have some money, I have no desire to go out and spend it. Life's lessons come in a variety of ways, but they're definitely all important.

Next, our poor Travis. Brent so lovingly named our what-used-to-be Chevy Traverse, Travis, the day we found out it was wrecked. Who totaled it? Yep! Austin. But guess what, I'm looking at it as a blessing. First, he switched insurance the day before, and had a clean record. (sucks for the insurance company, but i'm sure it's not the first time it's happened) He ran a red, hit a car, and totaled it. I wouldn't say totaling a car is a blessing, but some of the branches from that incident, I would consider such. First off, it takes away a car payment. The family isn't "struggling", but money is tight. Tight enough that well, who knows what may happen in the short future. One day at a time right? Second, my parents were expecting the insurance to write them a check for less than they owe, thinking at least 3-4k less. What happened? The exact opposite. So, no car payment (down a car, but we'll get to that), and $3500 in pocket. Luckily my Uncle has been kind enough to let my Dad drive around one of his extra cars, however, he's looking to sell it. I'm pretty sure my parents will purchase it, and we'll be back up to the same number of cars, with no extra payments. The Jetta is paid off, so that just leaves the HHR.

I suppose it depends on how you look at these things, but as for me, I'm taking them in stride as blessings.

As a second part to this post, I just wanted to comment on people. People come into your life and some make a lasting impression. An impression your mind just can't seem to let them go. I had a major crush on a particular girl, basically 2 years ago. For whatever reason, she is someone I will never forget. I don't know what it was about her........her hair, her laugh, her smile, or just her being her. I personally felt we developed a great friendship, but it never amounted to more than that. Honestly, to this day, that has been hard. There are certain connections made in life that are stronger than others, ours was strong. To me at least. Well, she's engaged. Am I sad about that? Well, yes and no. It hurts to think I never really had a chance, but I think what hurts the most (how ironic that I'm listening to Rascal Flatts right now.........that song too), is that our friendship is basically non existent at this time. Sure we're FB friends still, but I can almost guarantee I will be deleted when she gets married. It happens. It's normal. Apart from that, I am happy for her. True friendship is being happy for the other person when they are going through happy times. I am happy for her, and I know someday my Princess will come. Just not sure when that will be.......but one day. Right? :)

Speaking of, I have a new friendship developing. She lives out of state, so it is making things a bit more difficult. It also came about unexpectedly, but after the course of the last year and more, it seems that's when the best things happen. It's only been a couple weeks, but we seem to get along really well, and who knows. Anything could happen.

Oh yeah. BYU is in the sweet 16. Play today. It's JIMMER TIMMMMMMMMMMMMMME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yep, It's me

2011-03-09T21:58:00.003-07:00

Over a month and no post. I know you are all disappointed. (all 3 of you that read this) I have no excuse for my absence, except maybe business with a big presentation and the standard school stuff. Life is pretty uneventful right now.

I got a temporary job. It consists of these:

Ok, my job actually has nothing to do with even caring about those. All I get to do is sand off rust on the magnet, spray paint it, rub the rust off the foam pad, put it back in it's mini box, and box it back up with the rest of the defective order. Yeah, this is what I'm doing. "Fixing" Miche bag magnets. $10/hour. Contract labor=no taxes. No complaints. And I can work the hours I NEED....which is my only possibility for a job right now. Yeah, pretty boring, but good music gets me through it.

My old roommate Mike is getting married Saturday. That's weird. I'll post pictures from that, since I am sure I will take some. I'm happy for the kid though. I know he's worked a long time to get to this point and its a step in his life he needs to take. Yay :)

My dating life? What about it? Oh yeah, it's non existent. But you know, right now that's ok. I have made some good friends recently and who knows, anything could happen right?

Today is lent, which means you give something up for 4o days, which I've never done......is it really necessary to give something up for 40 days, then just jump ship at the end and get back into your habits? No. That's dumb. So starting today, tonight, I will start doing 2 things, and do them for the 40 days and hopefully by achieving these 40 days, it will make a new habit.

Read my scriptures & Personal prayer. Both things I know I need in my life and will greatly benefit me.

Pretty lame post, I know. But hey, it's a post. Right?

Love Hate Relationship

2011-02-03T10:47:00.002-07:00

There are a few things in this world with which I have a love-hate relationship. One of them is sweat pants.

I love coming home and around 9 or 10, changing into comfy pants to lounge around the house in. I recently bought some microfleece lounge pants from Kohls, and LOVE them. However, sleeping in them is just a pain. Getting in bed, and getting settled in is doable, but for me, half the night is spent waking up with my pants rolled up my leg. It drives me CRAZY!!! But since it's been so cold, it's so much better to sleep with pants and not shorts on, which is what I usually do.

Just thought I'd share that.

Complicated

2011-01-30T00:39:00.000-07:00

Dating is complicated. That is all.

Finding Me

2011-01-24T13:07:00.003-07:00

Life has been interesting of late: Sister got married, new year, brother still home, quit my job in a step of faith, almost done with school. Yeah, nothing really huge, but ultimately I've been really trying to find myself.

I'm 26. I was raised in a good family with parents and siblings who I know love and care about me. Typical Mormon raising, being taught right from wrong, to try and live the commandments and to respect my fellowmen. I went on a mission to Bolivia, of which I am eternally grateful, and have been home now for over 5 years. I graduated from Highschool almost 8 years ago, and well this is life.

As a Utah Mormon Boy, growing up meant certain mile stones. Up until I was 8, the milestone was getting baptized as a member of the Church my family belonged to, which happens to be the LDS church. Did I have a REAL, firm, testimony when I got baptized? Nope. Did I feel it was the right thing to do? Yes. Why? Because that's what I was taught. The next milestone, at least for me, was to get my Eagle Scout. Ages 11-14 was all about scouts; mutual as a deacon generally consisted of working on merit badges, or just doing something associated with scouts. Campouts, week long camps, and eventually, many merit badges later, Eagle at age 13 (or 14....) By this age, 14, I was in middle school and all that life consisted of was school. No job, no girlfriend (didn't really care too much yet...and I couldn't date either), which brings the next milestone: 16. Sixteen brought the "freedom", as it were, to drive and go about my own activities. I had my first job, started going on dates, and really this was a pretty life changing era of time. Motoring through high school, going to dances, hanging out with friends, going to concerts, life is becoming more social and more meaningful. I hit 18 in the beginning of my Senior year, so that wasn't really a huge milestone as it kinda happened during an already bigger part of life. The next milestone: Graduation. No problem. High school was, easy, right? I mean, you go to class, you do your assignments, you get good grades, and you finish. It just wasn't a big deal, at least to me. Next Milestone: Mission.

As a Mormon, growing up in Utah especially, and more specifically as a Mormon BOY, the mission is kind of the culminating milestone for your first 21 years of life. Everything you do in church is supposed to help you get ready for looming trial of a lifetime. And I say looming only in the sense of you knew it was coming, and it was going to be a big deal. Yeah, I had a testimony of the church, but it wasn't imprinted in my heart and soul as much as it is now. I will admit, I had never finished the Book of Mormon before the MTC, which is where I finished it for the first time and started gaining my own testimony.

Bolivia was a shocking experience, in so many ways and on so many levels. I really had no idea what to expect when I received my call to serve in the Bolivia, Santa Cruz mission. I knew where Bolivia was, that it was a Spanish speaking country, and that it would be a crazy experience. It was, completely. I sincerely grew to love the people I walked among for 2 years, and was truly sad to leave after that 2 year period was up. The mission really changes a lot of things about you, but it doesn't change who you ARE at the core, which is a very big misconception some people getting ready to go on a missions have. Some people think they'll go, become this spiritual giant, and come home and be praised for their goodness wherever they may go. Not true. In fact, I know of quite a few guys that returned home and have since lost their way. I will admit I have strayed a bit at times, but ultimately I know I am doing well right now and am on the right path, which brings me to the main point of this post. I'm 26, and STILL trying to find myself.

After so many milestones in life, you'd think a person would come to at least a semi-understanding of who they are and what they want from life. Yeah, I have a religion I believe in and know to be true; I'm in college, almost done with a Bachelors degree in a field I'm still not sure I really want to be in; I go on dates every once in a while, but ultimately I still feel lost in regards to who I am. The essence is of me establishing who I am, to myself and to those around me. I remember once instance being told that I "faked everyone out" on my mission from the letters I would write and such. Of course I never intended to fake anyone out of who I am, just it seems as you go through different phases of life, you are a different person.

I know I am a different person now than I was a year ago. I was living with my mission companion and some buddies in a House in Provo, but simply put, I just was not progressing. Then the best thing that could have happened to me, (of course I see this now) did: I got fired. Being fired forced me to move home and look for other opportunities. Since then I have been riding the bus to school everyday. Even riding the bus has given me a broader outlook on life. The world is full of so many different people, who each have their own issues going on and their own lives they are living. The other day there were two guys talking about having DUI's and not being able to drive. To them, that's the "norm". To me, that's insane. But what is the norm? Who decides what normal is for me? I really believe only one person can: Me.

Honestly, the next milestone in my life is to get married. Yeah I'm close to graduating, but if I want to use the bachelors I will have, Graduate school is a must. This means graduation doesn't mean a TON, at least not yet. My grades aren't stellar, which makes me believe it will be tough to actually get into a good school, if any at all. I don't doubt the choices I have made in my school career as I feel they are right for me, right now, but who knows.....maybe this year will bring something to light or something will change. I'm not obsessed with getting married, by any means, as I know it will happen eventually. However, my parents have been on me like white on rice to get married, well at least to date, but who can blame them? They had 2 kids by the time they were the age I am now, but times are different and so are people, of this I am sure. Of course I want to get married. I want the companionship, the love, and ultimately to achieve that milestone of my life. In a Mormon society, for a young man, it seems after the mission the only true milestone you have left is a "Regular" life: A career and a family. Hopefully along the way you can accomplish other goals you set for yourself, have adventures, and enjoy life. I suppose once you've reached that milestone, the next one is for retirement...but then what? I guess it just goes full circle.

I like where I am right now, I really do. I have a Mustache, which is something that is giving me an identity I never had before. And as dumb as it sounds, I feel like it's helping me be more confident in who I want to become. It's just something I changed, something small, that has made a difference in how I feel about myself. Yeah, Mustaches aren't the most popular facial hair, and unfortunately have been associated in our society with those of lesser moral values, but I feel like it's something that actually fits me. I even heard my Mom say she likes it. I'm not sure how long I'll keep it, but for now it's what I need to do, for me. Maybe this whole post is about selfishness, but in the end a person has to be somewhat selfish to figure out who they are. All I know is right now, I'm in it for the haul!

~Overheard at BYU

2011-01-05T09:36:00.002-07:00

BYU is a place where people say things that you wouldn't normally hear in conversation, except at BYU. Below are some gems I have heard at BYU in just a day & a half of the new semester.

Girl: Yeah, I mean my GPA isn't that bad. Last semester I got my first C ever.....it was a C+ so at least it's not just a normal C.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Girl: I really do try to be my best.

Boy: Well, I'm probably not just as spiritually in tune as you are.

Girl: *Laughs* Well, I wouldn't say that. I mean, you DID serve a mission.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yes, BYU, You are special.

The World We Live in

2010-11-21T22:11:00.002-07:00

The world needs to slow down.

This small realization came to me the other day while driving back from Provo. I was cruising along doing about 77 or so, yeah I know a bit about the posted 65, just keeping up with traffic. I definitely wasn't the fastest car on the freeway, which means of course there were other cars passing me. Not a problem. Well you that moment when you're driving in the middle lane, the one that you're technically SUPPOSED to drive in unless you are going slow, which is the right lane, and then the left if you are passing (Although it seems to be switched here in Utah. Go figure), and since you aren't flying or going way slow, you have to get over to one of the lanes. Logical choice would be the left lane right? Well, that's what I did, because it made sense. So I get over, continue at my approximate speed, and pass the car that was previously in front of me. I check my rear view mirror and see this White SUV barreling up behind me. Well on the left is the carpool lane, and on my right are two cars, so guess what? He had to slow down. Oh man!!! The END of the world!!! He starts tailing me a bit, so I speed up to pass the cars and get over and let him by. As he flies by, I take a glance at this person that was in such a hurry. He was talking on his phone, of course, had nice looking shades on, and a sense of extreme importance on his face. Now, I don't mean to judge and I don't know the situation he was in. Perhaps his wife was in the hospital in labor and he was rushing to get there before his new child was born. However, he looked like an impatient man who just wanted to get from A to B as fast as possible, which is fine I suppose, but this whole situation just made me think: What's the rush? Really?

We are here, on this earth, living our lives and doing the things we feel are important. We have such busy lives and many times hardly take any time to ourselves to reflect and take in everything that God has given us. My buddy Adam hiked the Appalachian Trail this past year, and well I can only imagine how he felt. People as a general rule are so obsessed with getting things done, getting good grades, doing well on a test, finding that one person, going to meetings, getting from A to B in a precise time. The Holidays are just around the corner and everyone will be going 10,000 mph trying to find that perfect present for that special someone, which is great, but is this really the point of what Christmas is all about?

This semester has been amazing for me. Getting fired was the best thing that ever happened to me (aside from the getting fired part), and has really helped me to put life into perspective. All I know is I am going to try and take some time to be thankful, to think and ponder over the marvels the Lord has given me, us. My invitation to all those that might read this is to make this Christmas the best one EVER. Not because you got the BEST present ever, or even GAVE the best gift possible, but because you were able to feel the true spirit of what it's all about and the reason we even have Christmas.

Take some time, slow down, and be happy.

Please?

2010-10-25T09:21:00.004-06:00

Dear Winter,

Please go away. I know it's about time for you to rear your ugly face, but I wouldn't mind another week or so of short sleeves and flip flops. Please take this into consideration, and I will at least try to enjoy the freezing frozen white moisture you tend to send in abundance. Thanks for trying. Much appreciated.

Sincerely your A-biggest fan,

Jeff

Thisblogposthasnotitle

2010-10-22T10:04:00.003-06:00

Yes. I made the title like that on purpose, because I couldn't think of an actual title.

I really should be studying right now, like really, but I felt like I needed to post this.

Basically my life is actually........wait for it..........good. Yeah I know right? Me, being optimistic about my life? Yeah I know I tend to take a pessimistic viewpoint at times, but sometimes it's hard to see the light when you feel you are surrounded by darkness.

7 months ago I was in a rut. I felt I was so deep, it was literally going to be impossible to get out. Then the best thing that could have happened to me, did. I got fired. Getting fired SUCKED, of course, but I've come to realize that most times in life when you feel like the worst thing ever is going on, it's going to have good results. Things are going so well right now, I just feel like something "bad" is bound to happen. If it does, well I will try to remember how i'm feeling today, October 22, 2010.

Moving home was a hard decision, not something I ever wanted to do, but I know I needed to be there. When Austin came home, it was a confirmed right decision. Even though I'm not around much because of school and work, the entire family is currently living there. It's kind of crazy to be honest, but we all have different schedules so there are rare moments when we get to spend actual time together. One such event was last week when I went to Brent's swim meet. He's been swimming for 3 years, and this was the first opportunity I have actually had to go. It required driving to Roy, but it was worth it. I love that kid and am proud of him for taking swimming seriously and improving from last year. I love being around Austin. We went to Tucano's last Saturday, just the boys (Him, Brent and myself) and had a blast. I forget how awesome my brothers are. Camille is getting married in less than a month, and I'm so happy for her. I'm stoked to have Tony as a brother-in-law as we already get along and have sports in common. I look forward to the days and times we will get to spend together. I know my parents are behind me in life. I know they don't seem to have words of comfort at times, but I know they are there.

I'm doing well in school, meaning I'm actually doing ok on my tests. I've scored above 80 on 2, and another in the high 70's. The first of the year doesn't count because I wasn't in this groove yet. Basically I'm learning to enjoy school, and actually LOOK FORWARD to going to my classes (except one because it's exceptionally boring...grammar "Language Structure" class). I have people around me in my classes who want me to succeed, who truly care about my efforts and are willing to help me.

I finally am able to go to church on a weekly basis, and have decided I will go for all 3 hours. This has been a challenge for me in the past couple years. But I know it's important, and now have a calling (Second Counselor SS) and will need to be around. I also received some pretty intense promised blessings when I was being set apart by Brother Zarbock, especially in regards to my future family.....Sorry, that's too personal to post here :) I just know being in the ward is where I need to be

So did I get fired for all these things to happen? Did I get fired to possibly meet my wife? Did I get fired to actually do well in school and be excited for it? I know the Lord has plans for all of us and by trying our best, he'll make things work. I've just never felt like things are so on track before, even before I was in the rut.

I finally feel like I'm ACTUALLY figuring out How to Live Life and Be good at it. Guess I never really knew before.... :)

Hilarious!

2010-10-20T22:43:00.002-06:00

I'm sure this has been circulated a billion times, but so worth it.

http://melodymaker.posterous.com/the-reason-some-girls-stay-single-very-funny

If the link doesn't work, then just Google "The Reason Some Girls Stay Single" or something. The guy is an idiot.

"I'm completely single, i'm very intelligent, i'm great in bed, I make good money, believe it or not i'm a complete catch"

"There's nothing wrong with me, matter of fact, i'm one of the few men in the city that has nothing wrong with him."

WOW. That's all. Good luck dude!

Drama

2010-10-20T17:15:00.002-06:00

Oh how I hate it. When it happens to me.

However, when it happens to someone else...and that someone is a someone I'm not a huge fan of, and the drama causes them to lose their work just like it did mine, it makes me smile.

Is Vengeance bad? Maybe I should be more Christ like and feel sorry for them. But you know, Karma is real. What goes around comes around, and all I can say is it makes me at least feel even more vindicated that before.

Good luck in life VS!!!!!

My Day Today

2010-10-13T21:34:00.002-06:00

6:30 am Wake up and Scriptures and family prayer

7:05 am: re-wake up

7:15 am: Shower

9:00 am: class

10:00 am: class

11:00 am: class

12:30: Thai food with Josh. Man I miss that kid.

Drive back to Sandy, pick up Dad and Sister to make it to Brother Swim meet: 3:30

Finally get home: 6:30 pm

12 hour day; 170 miles driven; 3 hours of class; 4 hours (with travel time) of family time.

Homework and studying done? None. Today was a good day.

Here I am

2010-09-08T20:10:00.003-06:00

Ok. I suck. At blogging. I was so sure I was going to do AWESOME at it this year........and it started out good, then summer came and laughed me away!! But I'm BACK!!

A lot........I mean A LOT has happened since I last wrote. Since I last really.......wrote........

I am living at home still. Yeah, I know. How many times did I say to myself "I will not ever live at home!!" Well, it happened and I'm here to stay at least for now. I'll get into that in a bit.

I'm currently working at Musicians Friend. I think I may have mentioned this before, but i'm not sure. It's a boring old call center job, where I was hired on at $10.50/hour. Not amazing. However, at this job we have the chance to make more by selling "Incentives" such as products on special, warranty's, etc. So it's not too bad. They have me working Sundays, although it's gotten better recently where they're going to schedule me a Sunday every once in a while, or like every other. I guess they NEVER do that and it's a pretty large exception for me. Guess they like me staying around. The nice thing too is they are working around my school schedule.

School. Has begun. I was really debating this semester what I should do. There are a few classes I need to probably retake, but retaking them, my Pell Grant doesn't pay for them anymore. So I decided just to go ahead and take ones I need to.

Hearing Tests and Measures: This class will be the most difficult. It's the second "Hearing" focused class in a row. I didn't do too well with the preceding class last semester, but the teacher is less hardcore (or so it seems), and I feel more comfortable already. That's probably a mistake itself, but I'm positive I can make things work.

Medical Speech Pathology: This class is the one I've enjoyed the most (as far as classes for my major go) and I don't see it having a ton of homework, more than just knowing the stuff we are talking about in class and such. Essentially, as far as I can tell, it's a break down of the medical field side of Speech Language Pathology, which is EXACTLY what I want to do with my degree later on. We've only had the class 3 times, but I've enjoyed every minute of it. Dr. Channell can be a bit tedious and boring, but the class and information is great. It's encouraging to me mainly because it is giving me a glimmer of hope to get a foot in the medical field, which is my dream, and which I will succeed someday.

Language Structure: I should have taken this class a year ago. I didn't. I'm taking it now, and essentially by not taking it back then, I delayed myself graduating for a semester. This class is just based around grammar and everything related. the book is "Rediscover Grammar" It hasn't honestly gotten into anything I don't understand or already know yet, so I don't think it's potentially a problem class. Maybe studying and getting down the terms and what he wants me to know.

Old Testament: This is my last religion class. Honestly, the "core" classes were bothersome, but the ones i've taken in the past year have been extremely enlightening. American Christianity really opened my eyes to the world of Christians and why they believe like they do. Writings of Isaiah really took me into a whole new world of understanding the ancient times. That class was AMAZING, and I HIGHLY recommend it to anyone at BYU (Take it from Brother Ball). It seriously took Isaiah, which anyone can agree is SO CONFUSING and SO hard to understand, and made it actually enjoyable. This O.T. class has a good outlook. I think. The teacher seems to know his stuff, and it's going to be good. I think it will have way more work than should be required for such a class, but whatever.

Judaism and the Gospel: Yep. Another one. This one is only 1 credit, but as soon as I saw the class title, I wanted in. There was another one for Islam, which I think would be even more fascinating, but this is the one I got into. I don't even NEED the religion credit, and I'm taking it. It's only once a week so that's kinda crappy........I mean how often do you actually LOOK FORWARD to a class? yeah, it's that cool. I'm excited to get into what Judaism is and how it relates to my beliefs.

So those are my classes. Since i'm living at home, I am taking the bus down to class as much as I can. Monday and Wednesday's I have a full day of classes, so I don't even work those days. I get to the bus at 7:50 or 8:05 and then don't get back until 6:50 or so. The other days, T, Th, Fri., it just depends on my work schedule. If they schedule me later, I can take the bus. If not, then I get to drive. But at least two days a week, I get to take the bus. GET? Yeah, really, I ENJOY taking the bus. Weird I know. Brent reminded me that in high school, I used the term "Gay" in reference to taking the bus. Isn't it weird how things change?

Well that's it for my life. Now for my family.

Ozzy. He's home from his mission for a hopefully temporary medical release. He was diagnosed with clinical depression. Crazy I know. However, after staying there as long as possible and trying to "fight" it, all decided (himself and the mission) it was best to get home and get it taken care of. It's something I can't understand, and to be honest it's a little trying, but I know he can get through. He has a TON of support from the family and all those around him. I think he just needs to realize what a special kid he is and that he's not alone. Today in my Judaism class, the teacher said "Christ's Assets are greater than our Liability's" WOW......Seriously.........all day today, All i heard were things I can say to help my brother......so yeah, he's here. I also know I'm living at home for this reason. When I debated on whether or not to move back to Provo, I just DIDN'T feel right about it. At all. Now It's all clear. So here's the mind boggler......did I get fired for THIS? Was that all for my brother? I mean I know I learned a TON from it, and wouldn't change it now that it's over, but how can things be so foreseen? Obvious question I know. I just can't comprehend it. Maybe i'm not supposed to, so I'll just try not to.

Dating life: Non existent. Right now is just nuts. I've tried this past summer, but the one girl who I thought I had a chance with, was just a frailty (not sure if i used that word right or even in correct context) My Aunt had someone lined up for me, but I put off calling her and now she has a BF. I even played around on eHarmony. Nothing there. Dating will happen. I will get married. I just need to figure out how to make it work. Kinda like everything.

This post has no pictures. For this I apologize. I'm not sure who even reads this, but I have a pretty awkward experience that happened today that I need to share. However at this time, I'm hungry and am going to go eat food.

LOVES!

Summers

2010-07-25T21:45:00.000-06:00

Summer? What Summer? It's almost August........that means school is starting. What am I doing about it? Am I moving back to Provo? Job? uhhhhhhhhhhhhh yeahhhhhhh about that........

Also, I suck at blogging in the summer. That's all.

FINALLY OVER!!!!!!!!!! (99% sure.......)

2010-06-29T08:30:00.003-06:00

So today, June 29, 2010, at 7:30 am, was the scheduled date for the hearing with my former company Nuskin regarding Unemployment. (See this and this )

So I have literally been losing sleep over this stupid thing for the last 2-3 weeks. Essentially since I found out Nuskin appealed it and wanted a hearing, which was I think June 11th.......yeah, it's been on my mind that much. I know it wasn't/isn't a big deal, but really to me, this whole thing, well the decision that would be made, would completely validate my feelings on what happened and the whole issue. If the decision was made against me, then it's a lesson learned and I move on. If it was made in my favor, I was right and never should have been fired, and the lesson would be learned for those involved from Nuskin.

So I rolled around all night waking up literally every half hour thinking it was time to get up to face the music. I wrote things out last night that I wanted to say; points I wanted to make, rebuttals to the "evidence" they sent to me, so I was ready to go. My parents were up and we were just talking about how I needed to be calm and collected on the call and just be open and honest about everything (hmmmmmm isn't that my philosophy on life ANYWAY?). My phone rings, finally, at 7:31. On the other line is Judge *Last name* (yeah I didn't write his name down.....oh well). He informs me that he called my former employer first, and they didn't answer. He left a message and told them they'd have until 7:45 am to call him back, or the case would be dismissed. Huge smile on my face, I told him that would be great. He said he'd let me know as soon as he had them on the phone, or if they never called back. I almost jumped out of chair with excitement. My Dad just laughed. How IRONIC!!!!!!!!!! Part of the reason I got fired was because of problems with being tardy.........seriously........to not make your OWN HEARING!??!?! WHO DOES THAT!!!!!!!! There are a lot of things that could have happened. Maybe they decided it really wasn't that big of a deal since I was just a nobody at Nuskin. Maybe the CEO aka my Parents Bishop, caught wind and told them they would not continue with the hearing. Who knows. All I know, is the CASE IS DISMISSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I haven't felt so relieved, so happy, in a long time. When I got the email from the unemployment office saying I wasn't at fault, that was a great moment. However, this tops it for sure. It's an amazing feeling. The only 2% of uggghhh still, is that they can reopen the case............if they do, they have to do it in writing and submit a valid reason why they didn't make the time. THEN it will be CONSIDERED to be opened again. I'm pretty sure it's over (that's where the 99% came from).

I have work off today. I'm playing Tennis at 10 with Steve. Japan is playing (USA and Mexico both lost........World Cup........so I chose Japan as my new team ) and they're going to win. Today is my day!!!!!!!!!

Vindicated. That is all.

Music!!!!!!!

2010-06-23T16:32:00.003-06:00

So my Dad's company, First National Bank of Layton (but he works in the Draper branch, in the mortgage department. Or something.), had a picnic thing last Monday night, June 14th. There was food, then a free concert. The performer was Peter Breinholdt, a LDS/Folk Musician. The concert was pretty amazing to be honest. I seriously love live music in any form, especially if the people performing actually have real talent. While watching him perform, I thought..........why can't I do this? Really? I mean I have written a fair amount of songs, I'm comfortable playing for other people, and I really want to start pursuing at least a part time career in Music. I really want to make music more of a part of my life, not just something I casually do on the side. I don't need to be completely famous or anything, just have good music and be able to relate to people through that. I know that I'm the only one holding myself back. So I'm going to start looking into recording gear, and getting my stuff out there. Anyone I've shown my songs to, always tell me they are good. Maybe they're just being nice, or maybe it's just my own self doubt or insecurities, but sometimes I don't feel they are "World ready" or Good enough to be put out in the public. But I'll never know if I don't know.

Anyway, during the concert there were a few songs that Peter told all the kids to come up to the front and dance along with him. There was this one kid (you'll see in the video below) in a Football Jersey who would come up and just dance like crazy. He'd turn around to the crowd and put his hands in the air like at a rock concert. His dancing was HILARIOUS. We were all completely BUSTING up. I also love the girl in the striped dress right in front of the camera. Kids are so innocent,and they just don't care what other people think. They were told to dance, so they did. And they had FUN! So, I took some video, I mean how could I NOT take video of this? So I hope you enjoy it as much as I did then :)

Random stuff

2010-06-23T15:39:00.007-06:00

So I rarely upload pictures. I love taking pictures, I just never do it. So here are some recent pictures and things. So enjoy :)

I took this picture randomly. I was bored. I actually shaved off my goatee today.......It was just buggin me. But I still have the Patch.

I finally went to a Bee's game. I didn't go to any last year, and wanted to go. A bunch of people went, however the Bee's lost......Lame

I think a big reason of why we went the night we did, was the fireworks. I only took a couple pictures. I can't seem to get a good picture of fireworks......ever

Tiki In the Sun........yeah I know........She's adorable. Oh, and there's my Mom too :)

Brent Can Literally sleep anywhere. We were out with my Dad one day, and my Dad took a motorcycle on a test drive. While we were waiting I wanted to see if the latch in my trunk actually works. So I made Brent get in the and I closed it on him. It DOES!! It even glows in the dark! So while we were waiting, he chilled there......and literally fell asleep.

Tiki is Small. That is all.

Not quite there

2010-06-23T15:37:00.001-06:00

I thought I was done dealing with Nuskin. Nope. They appealed the unemployment decision. I have a PHONE HEARING (yeah, what the crap?) This next Tuesday (June 29th). I'm kinda freaking out, even though I know it really won't be that big of a deal. Hopefully they will find out I have a new job and let things go. I will update on that after it's over.

Vindicated

2010-06-02T15:42:00.005-06:00

There are certain words in the English language that one can rarely find a use for. Personally, I've always wanted to find a really good excuse to use the word Vindicated.

Dictionary.com defines Vindicated as: to clear, as from an accusation, imputation, suspicion, or the like.

My last post, over a month ago (yeah I jacked up my 4/month goal.....i'll write 8 this month to make up for it), mentioned how I lost my job. I want to go a bit more into detail on the specifics of what happened, and how unfair it was; nevertheless, at this point, I am beginning to see it more as a blessing.

So Ricky Martin came out of the closet, big deal right? Well not really, I'm sure as he was losing popularity, he came out to cause a stir and be recognized again. Pop Stars, Famous People, the Media, the paparazzi, Whatever; I could care less. I was at work when one of my friends messaged me to tell me to check out a fellow co-worker/friends FB status. His status was simply "OMG RICKY MARTIN!!!!" or something to that effect. After seeing a few of the comments on the status, I decided to join in on the conversation. There was no bashing, (that I recall) and everyone commenting back and forth, the majority of which are members of the LDS church and share common beliefs, were just stating their opinions on the subject. So after work, I go home and think nothing of this. A month later (April 28th), I wake up to a text from the same friend who informed me of the conversation happening. This friend told me that everyone in her department, Distributor Support, had all been suspended for this conversation. Even those that withdrew their comments. I was informed that while asking about me, the HR rep that suspended them, told them that I would be disciplined as well. I go into work that day expecting to be suspended. I hadn't had any problems being tardy and what-not for almost a year. I was prepared to take it like a man, be apologetic, humble, and accept the consequences.

I was there for 2 hours, and get an IM from Tina. Tina isn't my manager, but basically the head of the call center. I'm thinking: This is weird......why wouldn't it be with my manager? I go in, and the HR person, with whom I haven't ever had a good relationship with, is there. I told them I knew what it was all about, and I understood what was going on. They had me sit down then proceeded to tell me why it was wrong, blah blah blah, etc. I was expecting that to be it, but then she informed me she had gone back into my chat history to see if there were any other things they could find (WTF? What cause?) and found a conversation i had had with another friend, regarding my manager and a team leader in the call center. This conversation wasn't vulgar, even though later I heard they found it to be "embarrassing and offensive." BS. But it was just about them possibly having an affair or something since they seemed to be spending a LOT of time together, in the managers office with the door closed. Then HR proceeded to tell me I had been put on a Language Action Plan (AGAIN, WTF!!! I was told EVERYONE had to do it and it wasn't just me or just the gringos......EVERYONE, was I lied to?)(This was also like the day before....) They felt, they being this specific HR person, that with all these things combined, It was enough for dismissal.

I went to the CEO, Truman Hunt, since he's my parents ward Bishop, and told him how I felt and my side of the story. He had been informed with an extremely exaggerated story, with sketchy details, and inconsistencies up the wazu. He told me he'd look into it all, and see what he could find out. I didn't expect my job back, and to be honest I doubt I'd want it back after that crap. I never heard back from him.

Unbelievable. Completely unjust and unfair. Not right. Not rectified. I could go on, but that was that.

Honestly, It was time for a change. I have been feeling stale for the past year, 2 years, maybe longer. I've lived in this house for 3 years, of which I have no regrets. My roommates are some of my best friends. But change needed to happen.

I informed my parents, of course, and then went from there. I applied for unemployment and started searching for jobs. About 3 weeks later, after being unsuccessful and even being turned down from one place because of why I was fired, I received a call from the unemployment office. She called to clear up a few things regarding my vacation pay I was paid out, and some details on what happened. She informed me what she had been told, and then asked for my side and rebuttal. Nuskin had told them/her the only reason I was fired was from the Facebook Conversation. They didn't include anything else, like tardies, or the "Language probation," or anything. Why? Because it WASN'T RELEVANT!! They also didn't mention the fact that 7 other people were involved, I know of at least 2 of which had had past disciplinary actions, and they weren't fired. Just suspended. With these inconsistencies, and crucial details, she told me she needed to talk to them again to clear some things up, and would get back to me. It wasn't even 2 days later (I think...) that I noticed an unemployment payment in my bank account!

The relieve and stress lifted from me, there is no description except one word: Vindicated. I feel completely vindicated from what happened. To make things even better, I got a letter from the unemployment office saying the following:

"Based upon the information presented to this Department, it is determined that you were not at fault in your discharge from work."

The words "You were not at fault" made me the happiest I've been in a LONG time. Something so simple, but something I knew that really made everything that had happened, feel it had happened for a reason. I'm a firm believer in that, things happen for a reason and you need to learn from whatever it is that has taken place, and go with it and take the changes with your head held high and a good attitude. Sure I was really really depressed for the first couple days after I was discharged, but looking back I know it was meant to be. I've needed to change my life around, in many areas, and I can honestly say I know this was a push from God. Some would say that's far fetched, and unlikely, but after all that has happened, I know differently.

I am currently in process of moving back home; it's not something I really want to do, but I haven't felt better about a decision in the last 3 years, as I have with this. It'll be temporary, especially after I find a job. Who knows what will happen; perhaps I will transfer to the U (totally theoretical at this point), perhaps I'll find a job that can lead into a career and take that for a while, really anything can, and i'm going to take it as it comes.

I'd like to leave you with some words. The song Vindicated by Dashboard confessional. Even though the song is really about him parting ways with a girl, or something along those lines, the part I have noted down, relates to me perfectly.

Hope dangles on a string
Like slow spinning redemption
Winding in and winding out
The shine of it has caught my eye

And roped me in
So mesmerizing, so hypnotizing
I am captivated

[Chorus]
I am Vindicated
I am selfish
I am wrong
I am right
I swear I'm right
I swear I knew it all along

And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well

Sorry this post has no pictures, no anything, and might be kinda boring. I promise to write more this month and to be more exciting. I just felt this story needed to be told, and hopefully someone can gain hope or inspiration from what I have gone through.

4 Years...........Gone

2010-04-28T15:29:00.002-06:00

I was fired today. After 4 years. Their excuse? I was having inappropriate conversations at work.

The people that were involved in these conversations, were only suspended or given verbal warnings.

Because of my "track record" I was terminated. So being tardy 3 times a month, instead of 2, is the same as having a good conversation about homosexuality and personal views and beliefs on the topic? Apparently so.

What have I learned from this? Corporate Worlds suck. I need to have my own job, with my own company, and set my own rules.

I realize rules are in place for a reason, but when the person from HR is looking for reasons to fire you, it doesn't help the scenario.

Anyway, I need a job. Anyone out there reading this that has a good job you can line me up with, that would be great!!

2010-04-16T19:34:00.000-06:00

Finals. Ugh.

At least I only have 3. I'm sure I'll be in grad school one day, looking back on how easy this all actually was. I guess it's worth it. Right?

Ducks and Springtime on Campus

2010-04-09T15:36:00.010-06:00

This is my current view on dating..........

Everything SEEMS nice. You meet, get to know each other then.....

Bam out of no where, the Girl runs away

Ok, Maybe it's not THAT extreme. But that's how it feels sometimes. I only bring this post up because it's Spring time!! Finally!! And all the signs are out. It's intriguing to watch people as you're walking along on campus, noticing couples sprawled out on the grass together, or groups of boys or girls laughing and drinking Jambas.

I had to study for my class and had an hour to spare; the Ducks are what I observed. The boy duck would calmly walk around and kinda follow the girl. Sometimes the girl would hide in the bushes, then when the boy duck wasn't watching, run away really fast. But the boy would casually walk around and follow her. The only duck making ANY sound was the girl duck. And the sounds......weren't pleasant.

As you can see, and hear, in the video, the Girl duck wasn't too thrilled. But that's nature, and that's life. Guys can chase girls, but only one will not squawk back at them. Maybe i'll find my Girl duck someday......Maybe I'll she'll squawk at me, maybe not. Hopefully I can be as calm and casual ast the Mallard in the video :)

MUUUUUUUUUSE

2010-04-09T14:54:00.005-06:00

Yes, that is Matthew Bellamy on the screen, and that is the stage they played on. To bad there were too many lights to get any really quality photos from my camera......should have taken my video camera. Live and learn!

Matthew, Chris and Dom rockin my socks off!

Love the Piano..... (crappy quality. I apologize.)

The concert was amazing. That's all there is to it. It was definitely longer than the Vegas show I went to, however I do think it lacked in song choice. The problem is they can't play EVERY song. Nevertheless, It was still mindblowing and amazing. I thouroughly enjoyed myself. My brother Brent came with me (The ticket was part of his Christmas present, and this was his first concert), my two roommates as well (also their first concerts......which is shocking to me). Everyone loved it. Everyone sang their voice almost gone. It was just purely just a good time and a good show. Although there is one thing I really don't understand. Muse=Snow. Somehow. Well at least, MUSE + Me= Snow. Last time I saw them, in Vegas, we had a near death experience on the way home that was caused by snow. This time we didn't have anything near that, but it was almost a white out when we were driving home. PLUS Muse got stuck in between here and Denver, and had to postpone their Denver show. Glad I dont' live in Denver......

The Goonies

2010-03-31T13:17:00.003-06:00

I'm always amazed when i meet people who HAVEN'T seen this movie. It's a travesty, and to be my friend, it's required you watch it. I'll watch it with you. I watched it with two newbies last night, and still enjoyed every minute of it. They laughed some, especially at the things Chunk and Data would say and do. I half wonder if even some of those were courtesy laughs, but you know what? I don't care! I LOVE IT! It made me happy and put me in a good mood. It always does.

I found on google there's a video game remake that was made for a competition in 2006. Totally going to d/l it and play it. Heck yeah!

"Dear Jack"

2010-03-20T00:43:00.004-06:00

I have been realizing and pondering a lot of things lately. The most recent came from watching the Documentary called "Dear Jack." For those of you who don't know the band Jack's Mannequin, I highly suggest you look into them. While they aren't new to me at all, after watching the story of all that Andrew McMahon went through, it gave me a renewed spirit of an I CAN attitude and a deeper respect for the band. Summed up, Andrew contracted and lived through a bout of Leukemia. The entire 60 minutes of the documentary shows his treatments and struggles, while trying to record an album at the same time..........there are hardly 5 minutes of him being down or sad or negative about his situation. Even when he use a lint roller to "shave" his head. I'd like to think if I were in any kind of similar situation (and I'm not wishing this in any way Karma.......) I'd hope to be have the will power he has to stick it out and get through it. I'm sure there were times he wanted to just die and move on and get it over with, but he knew how precious life is and fought through it. Currently it's on the Comcast On-Demand program (where I watched it) but can be purchased through the Jack's Mannequin site, or through amazon. By purchasing it through the site (at least, i'm sure any purchase does this...)Part of the proceeds go to the Dear Jack foundation. Anyway, just thought I'd throw this out there.

Jack's Mannequin Site

Amazon

You can also download it from iTunes for $10

I Just know how lucky I am to have the life I have. To not have had to suffer something massive like Leukemia, or losing a parent or sibling, really never having any drastic thing happen. I guess it doesn't mean it can't happen. It can. But at the same time, if it did, hopefully I would be able to get through it and be strong.

That is all :)

Aida

2010-03-16T09:43:00.004-06:00

I would like the Blogging world to meet my new friend. Her name was in debate for a while (ok only a day). Some options were: Bertha, Red Dragon, Vanespa, and some others. Alex wins though. AIDA (pronounced ah-EE-Duh) is her name. I can't believe I ACTUALLY won a Vespa. I still had to pay quite a bit of money for the taxes, title, Freight, blah blah blabbity Blah. But..........Still, worth it to me. I'll save quite a bit of money on gas this summer. Filling up the gas tank for $4.30 and it SHOULD last me about 120 miles or more.....yeah pretty amazing. Anyway, this is her

The Irony: I go to BYU, and Aida is red. Yep. Crazy I know. (Yes I wrote this ALL in Blue on Purpose)

Questions to Ponder

2010-03-07T15:25:00.004-07:00

"Goals: There is no end to the amount of things you can accomplish"

Sometimes I wonder things. I wonder things like "Is this actually where I want to be?" "What if I had made a different choice 10 years ago?" "What If i was born in Rhode Island?"

I know that many things that happen to us are not in our control. We are born where we are because our parents conceived us and my belief is that we are put into the families we are because we chose them. I can't imagine living in a different family, being raised by different parents, having different siblings or none at all, not having the friends I do.

I also wonder things like when People I have been interested in get married "Was she one that got away?" When a friend who I thought would be a friend forever doesn't want anything to do with me, "Was this my fault?" When I see close friends of mine going through a rough time OR "getting" everything they could have ever wanted and I think "Why do they have to go through that" or "Why are they so fortunate?"

There are things in my life I want. There are desires I feel I will never achieve. I had an interesting conversation with Adam last night about progression. I have felt stale for the past 2 years, maybe less but probably more, like I'm going no where. But really, it's no one's fault but my own. My own disbelief in myself, in my abilities, in my talents, is the cause of me not progressing. We as human beings have the power to change our own circumstances. That is the most beautiful gift God has given us: Agency, the ability to choose for ourselves what we want to do, what we want from life, where we want to go. As I'm writing this it almost makes me depressed realizing my own faults and weaknesses are preventing me from getting where I want. However, it also gives me some comfort knowing I can change. I really can. It's up to me, no one else. If I REALLY want to be a doctor, and/or work in the medical field, all it would take is extra work, more schooling, and superior dedication.

There's that whole quote about Abraham Lincoln, how he failed so many times at so many things, but eventually was able to achieve a goal and is still recognized as one of they key leaders in American History. Imagine if he had given up after his last failure, before achieving his first victory, where would America be today? Would someone else have done the same thing? It's possible, but the good thing is he DID try again and he DID achieve greatness.

I started a new goal, well re-started, on March 1st. It's simple: No drinking soda. I don't know why I feel it's so important, but it really isn't that hard. If i can do something as simple as that, I know I can put my mind to other things. This week, the week of March 7th, 2010, I am going to go and talk to the Pre-Med advisors and see what they suggest I do to achieve the dream I have. Dreaming is only helpful if you go after your greatest desire.

........Vespa....who'd have thought.........?

2010-02-26T13:18:00.003-07:00

First, let me start back in December when I went to Las Vegas to see Muse, I was introduced to a new Band. The Paper Tongues. (see full post) That trip was pretty crazy by itself, but it seems it has gotten even more interesting 2 months down the road.

I got home and went to the Papertongues website and joined to be on their email list. Well apparently they had/have a sweepstakes going for a Paper Tongues Vespa....a Vespa...really? Kinda random, but cool none the less. So by signing up on their website, you would get entered automatically.

There are certain things in this world that a person would most likely never buy for themselves. Some good examples, for me, would be a jar of pickles, a Honda element, World of Warcraft, among other things the least likely thing I would buy for myself is a Vespa. If I were a single guy....well I AM single....but a Single guy living in Italy, I'd probably have one. However, I am not. So I wouldn't ever really see any need to buy a Vespa. However If i got one for free....that could be cool. I mean who doesn't want a free....anything?

This week has been busy. Studying, taking tests, working, being sick, working on a project, studying, almost non stop stuff. I rarely don't check my emails, but ever since I got my DROID, and have email on my phone, I don't really check other accounts anymore. Last night I get on and open up my old email, the one i signed up on the PT website with, and lo and behold I had an interesting email from them. This is what it looked like.

Dear Jeff Mabey,

We're writing to inform you that you've been randomly selected as the Grand Prize Winner of the Paper Tongues 'Ride to California on a Vespa' Contest. You've won a brand new Vespa S50. As per the official rules of the contest, you are required to provide all of the following documentation prior to being awarded the prize.

1. Proof of residence (copy of valid drivers license)
2. Proof of a valid license to operate a motorized cycle (winner is responsible for determining the appropriate class of license within their state of residence)
3. Proof of motor liability insurance
4. Completed W-9 form (attached) for tax reporting purposes.

Please contact us via email confirming receipt of this notice and acceptance of the grand prize offer as well as a the best phone number(s) to reach you. All documentation outlined above must be received by us via registered mail at the address below no later than 6pm EST March 12, 2010 or your status as the winner may be forfeited. Upon certification of eligibility requirements, you will be contacted to schedule delivery of the prize.

Please send the aforementioned documentation to the address below:

Paper Tongues - 'Ride to California on a Vespa' Contest
c/o A&M Octone Records
113 University Ave
11th Floor
New York, NY 10003

NOTE: we strongly suggest that you alert us via this email address with the detailed tracking information once your documentation has been sent to ensure prompt review.

Once again, Congratulations!,

Paper Tongues

To ME, that LOOKS pretty dang legit. Octone records is Legit, Paper Tongues is legit ( I saw them in concert), the contest is Legit (at least appears to be on their website), and well...I think I actually really DID win a Vespa. I was basically freaking out last night when I read the email. There was actually an email from this past Tuesday, saying "please read the email we sent you last Saturday, AND respond by Friday February 26th, or forfeit your prize." So I did. I haven't heard back from them yet......I'm just hoping Everything is cool. I don't know why it WOULDN'T be legit, but who knows I guess. Anyway I'll keep you....blog world....updated :)

YAY for a WIN!

My ThEoRy

2010-02-16T22:51:00.005-07:00

This is My Theory on Dating, well not really on dating, but more on girls and guys. Today, not 30 years ago. I haven't met many people that disagree with me because there is truth in this.

The Way Things Are

Men: Simple.

Women:Complicated.

Simple Explanation: Many times girls will say "MAN GUYS ARE SO COMPLICATED!!!" but the reality, is that we are not. We ARE simple, but a girl's mind thinks so differently and so much more complicatedly, that they can't grasp how simple we must be, so we MUST be complicated. They're complicatedness, MAKES us SEEM complicated, when we're really simple.

Complicated Explanation:There is none. It needs none. Simple as that. (see?)

Ok there might be some biased conjecture seeing that I'm a guy, but just really think about relationships....and the issues people have. It really boils down to miscommunication. I had a recent relationship, which ended in us being just friends, where the whole thing was based on an open and honest communication-ship. It just makes sense: SAY the things you want to say. Don't HIDE things, be yourself. Instead of Analyzing, JUST ASK. I know it SOUNDS hard, but really....It's harder on the person to guess and freak out about things than it is to just talk. Communicate.

I don't feel my theory really needs any further explanation. I just do know that in today's day and age, Dating has become something people loath instead of enjoy. I haven't been actively dating lately, and I know I need too. My Mom made a good point yesterday; I can have fun with my roommates and I will miss that in the future, but a forever roommate and companion will be even more fun and kinda the next step in life. I just wish I could make it happen. Maybe I should try my Dad's approach: Find a Girl I like, go out a few times, then say "I think we should continue this relationship." (My Dad said that word for word. Yeah we make fun of him pretty much all the time for it.) Hey, It worked.

$$ MONEY $$

2010-02-15T14:05:00.008-07:00

Let's be honest; If someone walked up to me and handed me the above pile of Bills, even if only the top one was a Benjamin, and the rest were George's, would I not take it? I'd love to say no, but of course I would!!!

Money, I believe, is the root of 99% of all stresses and problems. Of course many other factors can cause these stresses, however most likely it could be rooted back to the one thing that drives us as human beings to do the strangest things. I searched "Money Quotes" on Google, and found a few interesting and extremely true thoughts.

"They who are of the opinion that Money will do everything, may very well be suspected to do everything for Money" ~George Savile~

You walk down the street, you see garbage cans out, sometimes overflowing and sometimes empty. A truck drives by and picks it up and takes it away. It's one of those things we take for granted. One of those jobs that "someone has to do it," but how glorious is being a Garbage man? Growing up my Dad always said things like "you better get an education, or you'll end up a Garbage man." I honestly have no problem with a person being a garbage man, but it comes down to the point of doing almost anything for money. Picking up other peoples trash and taking it to a dump (that smells horrendously), and disposing of it for them. It's a job. I guess that is the important part. However in today's age of game shows, media, and greediness, people will do literally almost anything for money. I remember seeing commercials for a recent show basically flaunting a family and their problems and dishonesty for entertainment. I don't remember if it even took off, or if it's still around, but the fact is: People will do anything for money.

Meet James......

"The only reason a great many American families don't own an elephant is that they have never been offered an elephant for a dollar down and easy weekly payments" ~Mad Magazine~

James is the name of the elephant I will have one day....................America is all about "I want the best, and I want it now!" America is (insert insanely large number) Trillions of Dollars in debt. Yet the Government bails out the car companies? I guess that doesn't really reflect the true point of this quote, but people, as an example, want cars. Nice cars. Expensive cars. Unnecessary options. I will admit, I drive a nice car. I didn't buy it, but at this point in time i'm debating on getting rid of it to help my parents out. I don't NEED a really nice car, it's not necessary. How often do we as people see something we want, and just HAVE it. "Zero interest, no payments for a year, blah blah blah...." While these stipulations may be nice, generally people fall further into debt (mainly from fine print materials) than they would have saved by not splurging unnecessarily. Who needs an elephant? Who would want an elephant? Would it be completely AWESOME to have an elephant hanging out in your back yard? YESSSSSSSSSSSSS, is it completely unnecessary!?!?! Even more so.........But they have a good point. It's never been offered. Maybe it has, i doubt it, but if it were.......I'd probably want one. Who wouldn't want a pet elephant? James would be a good elephant.

"I'd like to live as a poor man with lots of money"~Pablo Picasso~

Who WANTS to live poor? No one. Who COULD live poor, most likely everyone. People have done it for thousands of years, and we're still here. It's not preferable by any means, I would rather have money than not, but I've discovered in the past 3 or 4 weeks I can get by with almost nothing. Cutting out fast food, not buying things that I WANT (unnecessary items aka movies, music, new guitar...etc.), and just watching my budget, I've been ok. The only drawback to this is the what If's. What if something happens and I need to pay some random bill. I know however everything will be ok, even if i have to go in debt, things will work out. It's the cycle. Things have to come full circle, it's just how life goes. Life is not ALWAYS so bad for one person, good things do happen. It's hard to see those things, or realize them when it seems all is downhill, but they do and will happen. I just have to keep telling myself that. My mission President once said "Money isn't the most important thing in the world, but it's great not having to worry about it." You don't HAVE to live the life of a rich person if you are rich, in fact I wouldn't. But having money to do what you need and support yourself and family without problems, that would be great.

Life is not meant to be lived in fear, stressed, in sorrow and depression. Life is meant to be enjoyed, as hard as that can be at times. Because of financial stresses on my family right now, I have let my guard down and let these stresses get to me. I've been debating making some major changes in my life because of this, but perhaps these stresses were the reason.

Only God knows how much my life needs to change, He and I both do. Maybe he is letting things happen to help me on my way during this time of my life, to change some things to help me progress beyond where I am now. Being stale is getting old, and changes are needed, and hopefully on their way. I'm not sure exactly which changes yet, I have made a list of pros and cons about one big change that would completely alter how I live life currently, and right now the change is looking more positive than negative. Of course if these changes occur, I will update to the 2 or 3 people that read this blog................:)

Lines, Tests, and Taco's

2010-02-04T22:15:00.006-07:00

8 hours on campus, 2 hours spent taking tests, 1 hour 40 Minutes in class, 3 hours studying, one hour standing in line. Not too unsimilar from the one seen above. (the picture above is NOT the line i was standing in)

Today is February 4th, 2010. It's a Thursday. It isn't close to any midterms, not remotely close to finals, just an average day of the week in, during an atypically warm day in February (this is somewhat relevant). Along with the a-typicality of "warm" weather in February, why not throw in a long line at the testing center?

Normally I don't put tests off until the last 3 hours of the last day to take them, however in this case it was the only choice I had. Generally teachers give at least 2-3 days to take a test, but for the first time in my college career I had only 1 day to take a test. On top of that I had another test for a class within my major, scheduled yesterday and today. Is it really THAT hard for 2 teachers to coordinate their exams? Do teachers do this on purpose to throw us off? I mean what was the difference of one test being Wed-Thurs, and the other class Thurs-Fri. Or even if the teacher wanted to keep it at one day, why not put it on Friday instead of on the same day as the two-day exam? The teacher did in fact cancel class today, which gave her reason to say we could take it during that class time at the very least. It just isn't logical. I realize that this is college, and teachers just do what they want because, well, they're the teacher. However, I believe they should take into consideration the fact that we as students, as human beings, have a life outside of BYU. REALLY!?!? What a SHOCKER!!! (Note: I really don't have much of a life, but I do work.....and Do other stuff too...)

I planned my day out relatively simple. I took work off to study more, which gave me the option to sleep in some (which was needed since it still ended up being a long day). I went to campus at 12:30 ish, took my first test, Hearing Science, from 1-2:15 or so, then met up with some people to study for the second test on my agenda. By this point we had all studied our brains out, and extra studying, especially group, turned into chatting and joking around. In the 2 hour period i was with those friends, we probably studied for half that, or less. But that was ok; it was good to relax a bit and actually enjoy life as a student for once. I took off to grab some food and study for a quiz in my upcoming class at 5: Writings of Isaiah. (It sounds intense, and it actually is somewhat, but more than that it's quite exciting. I always skip through the Isaiah chapters when I get to them in the Book of Mormon; now that I have a class with a teacher that knows historical and cultural background to the things Isaiah is saying, it's interesting to realize how "Plain" he was speaking to those people.) After class I planned on heading to the testing center and taking my last test: Phonological and Articulation Disorders. Exciting huh? As the testing center is the next building over from where I had my Isaiah class, I realized my plan was horribly foiled as soon as I walked out that door.

When a person goes to a theme park, a concert, an autograph signing, or a prime example would be Black Friday shopping, waiting in a line is expected. The only time waiting in a line for a test could be said to be, "expected," would be during finals week. Is it finals now? No. Should there be a line OUT THE DOOR, over to the next building over, on a THURSDAY in FEBRUARY? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! Apparently the printer, that prints out scan-trons, pooped out and it forced the staff to write the student names and information in the test, thus causing the back up and extra abnormally long lines. For a COMPLETE report on what happened, go here.

Have we become so dependent on technology, the second it craps out on us, it completely halts all traffic and stops everything? I can't even remember what it was like to not have the internet, a cell phone, Electricity........Even on my mission in Bolivia, in the middle of the jungle, we had electricity and running water (not to say everyone there does). I realize that establishments, such as BYU, have a system in place to make things work even if something does happen. I also suppose it could have been worse. It was one of the warmer days we've had recently, and even though it was well past dark, it wasn't completely unbearable to be outside for 20 minutes I had to be. I found a friend in line that so happened to be in my Isaiah class, AND taking the same test I was, so it made the line not seem so boring and gave us a chance to study and ask questions.

There's always someone worse off than yourself. Sometimes I forget this, but there is a lot of truth in that statement. My new friend, Kimbri, tried to keep a positive outlook on things as we got closer to the........finish, not sure if that's the right word since taking a test isn't exactly something to look forward to...........And it reminded me of something my 2nd companion taught me. Look around you, look around the world, look anywhere, and you will find someone worse off than yourself. I know I am truly blessed and have such a good quality life. Sure it's not exciting sometimes, but I really do have it good.

Taco's: I made Taco's tonight. I finished them past 10, but it was my dinner night. My roommates and I have kept a good thing going for the past 3-4 weeks. All taking turns making dinner and taking a dish night. I really do appreciate their willingness to make things better. I'm attempting to make new dishes weekly. So far I have Made BBQ Biscuit Casserole and Poppy Seed Chicken, both thanks to my good friend Megan. I did my amazing Taco's tonight. I think they are. Any readers out there, I know they are few, If you have any good, simple or somewhat "challenging" recipes you think I should try, throw it out there. I want to LEARN!!!!

WOW....umm...k...WOW

2010-01-28T20:01:00.004-07:00

I won't lie, that picture looks awesome. This guy completely decked out in armor, ready to go to battle, fierce looking, complete with battle axe and all. I would be scared to death to see him in real life.

My brother Austin, who is currently on a mission, used to be completely addicted to the World of Warcraft. All he would do, when not working or dealing with school stuff, is just that. Play WOW. As I was a video gamer in my younger years, and still am but on a much smaller scale, I can understand the pull a video game can have on a person. I might even go as far as saying it can be a stress reliever and a good source of entertainment for a busy life. Escaping reality for a short while, in my opinion, isn't all that bad. Everyone needs to have time to themselves to do what they want, to enjoy life, and to be chill. However ALL things, good or bad, should be done in moderation. For example, I firmly believe that reading the scriptures non stop everyday for a month is way too much. God gave us scriptures to instruct us and guide us during our journey here on Earth, not to bog us down not allowing us to live.

WOW is addicting. I know this for a fact. My brother was addicted to it, but he had the ability to walk away from it. I'm sure there are people out there who literally all they do is play the game, and live off of......well I honestly don't even know. I know there are people obsessed over it. Austin once bought a pack of WOW trading/playing/game cards, and chanced upon some lucky card that allowed his character to spawn a special pet, or something, in the game. He sold that CODE....literally a 10 digit number, for $800 on ebay. EIGHT HUNDRED DOLLARS......THAT is what I would call obsessed. The guy called him and told him he just wanted the code, and my brother gave it to him after the transaction was complete. I can't imagine having a life where $800 was less important than a feature on a video game. That's completely insane. Maybe I should invest in WOW playing cards and sell them online.......ok, no.

The whole reason for this post is not to bash those that play the game. I'm perfectly OK with playing the game in moderation, but just don't get obsessed with it. Obsessing over anything I think isn't really a good thing. I just have wondered recently about our society and things like this, and the impact it has. The entertainment industry is huge, It probably make more money than our country is in debt (just conjecture, and I realize our country is in debt so far we couldn't even count), which goes to show where peoples priorities are. Families are torn apart by vices such as Pornography, Alcohol and Drug abuse, etc. Is this really any different? I can understand both sides of the argument, but i would venture so far as to say it is not. It's an addiction, and could be the cause of pain and ruining lives.

Now for me.

I do not play this game. I refuse to even start.

My reasons are basic:

A. I have no desire. I see my roommates play, again which is fine, and well it just doesn't catch my interest. At all. Zero interest.

B. $15 a month to play a game. What happened to the old days when you bought the game, and that was it. No monthly fees, no gimmicks, just a good quality game. Warcraft 1 was amazing. Warcraft 2 was revolutionary. Then Starcraft came out, even cooler. I remember playing Warcraft 1 with my best friend Nick Griffiths, and we thought it was amazing. It was. It still is. Once we beat it, we still played, probably more than we should have, but it wasn't the same as WOW.

C. I don't have the time for it. I have work and class everyday, which means I'm gone from about 8 or 9 til 6 and at the latest 7, depending on the day. I don't have a ton of homework this semester, but I feel, personally, there are so many more productive things I can be doing (even though I still may not do those), and being stuck playing a game, is not on the agenda for favorite things to do. I've been able to spend more time playing the guitar, I even read a book recently, and I have time to do my studying and homework.

D. Boredom. I play video games, I can get into them and play for an hour or two. After that, I get bored, even if it's a game I really like, I still get tired of it. I cannot imagine sitting in front of the computer screen for hours, an entire day, not sleeping (as i'm sure some gamers do), just to "Run a Raid" or "gather herbs." I just can't imagine that feeling more important to accomplish than getting sleep. Something your body needs.

I'm sure I'm not the first to take a stab at the world of online gaming, but just from my observation and experience, I believe my feelings on the subject are clear.

Ps. Post #4. Goal complete for this month. I will probably write again this month anyway :)

Samantha Jordan

2010-01-22T23:11:00.011-07:00

Samantha makes me happy.

She never disappoints to sooth any pain,
anguish,

or fear I might have.

She helps me forget those things that worry me the most.

My happiness is complete when I'm with her,

She understands me and I understand her.

I'm sad when she's injured and I don't have the means to take care of her.

She forgives me by being even more amazing after I've healed her.

She is a healer of shattered hopes and torn souls.

She mends a broken heart.

She is a part of me and I a part of her.

She never disappoints, only frustrates when we aren't getting along.

We make up and everything was worth it.

I can't help but smile when I spend time with her

Her name is Samantha, Samantha Jordan

Meet Samantha Jordan:

I'm not sure why this one came out so small, But this is her.

This is her insides

This is a close up of her body, and Melodious strings (also my favorite pic)

Yes my Friends, Samantha Jordan is my guitar. She's the one I would LOVE to devote all my time to, and she has been the recipient of most of my free time recently. I started recording songs I have written, just through the Mic on my computer, And even though the recording isn't that great, I have started to become addicted to the sound of my music coming through speakers. I've shared my 5 recorded songs with some friends, and I've been extremely surprised at the praise I've received. Maybe it's my insecurities about my voice or my lack of extreme awesomeness that makes me doubt any compliments I've received, I'm sure most artists are at first. I'd really like to get some opinions of people who I don't know personally as well. I don't know how to post the songs on here, or else I would. I suppose I could just start a Myspace page or something? That's so ghetto though........I also want to get REAL recordings done. Too bad I'm poor. Maybe some day :)

Lost

2010-01-20T22:36:00.005-07:00

I am Lost. I have decided this tonight. I feel as if I'm at a crossroads, with 10 different directions to go, and I'm sitting in the middle with my legs and arms crossed, my head down and a hoodie over my head not wanting to look at any of the Options. The worst part of the whole situation is basically not knowing what the 10 different roads are. I know what I feel and what I theoretically want, but all in all it seems It's too late to make any drastic changes in my life as far as school, career, location go.

I've also been living in the same house for 2 1/2 years, of which I don't regret. I love my roommates, my living conditions, my privacy, and my current life is comfortable. However, I believe this is precisely where my problem is: I've become too comfortable with my current life, even if it's been on cruise control for what seems like the last year, or more. But is being comfortable really a bad thing? I just feel like I don't have any opportunity to advance in life in my current situation. A certain friend asked me a while back when I'm going to move out of this house, and my answer was "I have no reason to." I really don't, but I'm starting to feel like I have more reason than ever before. The problem is I don't know where I would go. I don't want the student housing/apartments scene. I'm over that. I'm over wanting the party life, I want to move on. But I don't even know what moving on entails exactly. I know what the next step of life SHOULD be, and I feel i'm "ready" to take that on, but I can't force that to happen, although I'm really not doing my part to speed along the process......

I just wish Moroni would come down to me and tell me exactly what to do and what direction to go. Then again, I'm not sure I WANT to know the course in life I HAVE to go, Plus I honestly don't think there's just ONE way to go for a person. I just know I need to step it up on many levels and start caring. I do care, I just have a hard time showing it.

My current major is Communication Disorders, which then branches out into Speech Language Pathology or Audiology. I chose this major because I had considered it before, heard good things about it, it sounded interesting, a Personality inventory taken during a planning and decision making class suggested it, and it seemed to be a quick major. My original thoughts were to go Audiology, which is what I still plan to do, however with my current grades I'm not sure what is feasible. The main issue here is that I have so many hours, I'm not sure the university would allow me to change majors without some kind of special permission. I don't know what I'd change to anyway.

So that's how I'm feeling right now. I'm not sure why the world needs to know this, or even cares, but it feels good to get out.

Should........

2010-01-19T18:05:00.003-07:00

I really SHOULD Blog, But I don't feel like it. So I'm not going to. Just thought I'd throw that out there.

However: Goal for this year, concerning Blogging: at LEAST 4 times per month, whether it be something small like this, or a 9 page report like half of my entries. I have other goals too. That will be an upcoming entry :)

An A-Mazing and A-Musing weekend

2009-12-13T23:06:00.006-07:00

"I usually try to take advantage of exceptional opportunities when they present themselves."

-Whitney Olsen

Basically life is precious, life needs to be lived, lessons need to be learned; through a myriad of perfect circumstances, I can say I felt the guidance of an angel today. The angel that guided our car in a 360 degree spin across two lanes of traffic, in front of at least two cars. The angel that stopped the car in the snow before the gaping hole; the force making sure the car split the space between the two posts. The weather angel that cleared out the clouds and let the sun peek through to give us some relief from the cold; the snow that stopped as we were working things out. The tow truck driver, who was on top of his job and making sure people were safe, who just so happened upon us 10 minutes after we were stuck, who accepted AAA, even though I didn't have a card; who lectured us on the importance of driving safely during inclement weather. The exact timing it took for us to be where we were, when we were. The decision made the night before to stay the night in Vegas, even though we wanted to just drive through the night. When a crappy scenario happens, there are circumstances, the BEST circumstances, that you could normally only ask for. All of those happened. I cannot think of even one thing, apart from NOT having the incident occur, that could have gone better. I would almost even say, I'm glad it happened. It was kind of terrifying, but at the same time, it was a huge testimony builder that there really is someone watching out for me.

Usually I avoid any kind of bad weather driving when it's not completely necessary, but let me start about a week ago, December 6^th to be precise. Whitney Spurrier, a friend from my home ward and long ago, spurred (no pun intended…especially as her last name is now Olsen J )a chain of events that would lead to one of the best weekends of my life; at least this year 2009. She posted a facebook status asking if anyone in her realm of friends were Muse fans. Muse is amazing; I LOVE Muse; I have wanted to see them live for a LONG TIME now. When Whitney posted her status asking if anyone wanted to go to the sold out show in Vegas, I jumped on it. Jennifer Sorenson decided to live up life a bit and go out of her way to the Muse show in Vegas, something not many people would do. Myself included. When I almost couldn't find anyone to come with me, I almost gave up. Finally Adam answered the call to Muse, and said we should go. From that point on I was excited beyond measure. The week lead with so much school work, and stress about finals, I almost forgot what was to happen Saturday night at 8:00 PM in Las Vegas, but luckily my brain remembered and the day arrived.

We decided to leave Saturday morning as Adam had a field trip on Friday night, and we figured there was no need to drive during the night when the concert didn't start until 8 pm Vegas time. We left Provo about 9 am, and meandered down to Las Vegas. We didn't really encounter much weather, just a bit of snow and fog, but after that it was smooth sailing. We got to Vegas and decided to search out my Uncle Andy's house, as we made accommodations to stay the night with them. We found the house and talked to my Aunt for a bit and decided to go out and see the strip a bit since Adam and Jenn hadn't really ever seen it. Of course if you are Mormon and don't live the lifestyle Las Vegas offers, there isn't a TON to do. We didn't have tons of time either to go shopping or to search out anything spectacular. We walked around a bit, saw the Lions at the MGM, saw the slot machines….the thousands of them….saw some bums, and people starting to get drunk, and made our way back to the car. We decided to search out the venue where the concert would be, and find parking so as not to have to deal with it later on. We found everything, and found that the concert would be happening in the Hard Rock Hotel, at a venue called The Joint. We had about 3-4 hours to kill, so we decided to go eat at the Hard Rock Café. It was good, nothing AMAZING, but good. Probably not worth what we spent, but hey, as Adam said "How often are you going to be in Vegas to see Muse, and eat at the Hard Rock Café?" Yeah, probably never again; so that was my excuse to get a $20 steak. You gotta live right? Isn't that what this world/life is all about? Making the world your playground, living life to the fullest, doing those things you normally wouldn't do, taking chances and making life exciting. After dinner we walked around a bit, went to a golf store where Adam bought a present for his Grandpa, then went to get in line, 2 hours early, in a line that seemed to be 10 miles long.

FINALLY we got into the venue at about 7:30, after standing in line for an hour or so. The show started pretty close to 8 pm, as we weren't on Mormon Standard Time, and opened with a band called "Afghan radar." I won't even begin with how ANNOYING and NOT Muse they were. Essentially they played the same song 5 times over, with a different beat. It was two guys, one singing, one head banging and jamming out to a electronic board…or something….it may have been nothing to be honest. Who knows. If I wanted to go clubbing, I would have gone to a club, where techno dance electronica music is expected. After a good solid half hour of annoyingness, they stopped. I wonder how much of the clapping was people being thankful they were done vs. people actually enjoying their tunes…..yeah….that. Anyway, next up was a band formerly unknown, now LOVED, named Paper Tongues. I sincerely would like to see this band take off as they have an extremely unique sound, and are awesome. Check Them Out Here!! Basically they're one of my new favorite bands, and they don't even have an album out yet. Part of the reason I love going to concerts is to learn about new bands. Bands that harmonize and sing rock out, and sound stellar, are harder to come by these days; I really hope they take off. After they played, a band known as Cage The Elephant played. The singer was crazy, completely insane….I swear he was going to have a seizure, or was having one half the time he was singing. They were pretty rad, not exactly my taste for live music, but I'm sure their studio stuff sounds good. They played a good while, then left the stage and left us in earnest waiting for Muse.

Muse is AMAZING. That's all I can say. I always had an appreciation for them and their musical talent, but I never fully realized how amazing they are. They hit every note, every sound, played with energy and emotion, got the crowd involved, and so much more. I haven't ever felt so tired in my life, but didn't care and wanted them to play more. They only played an hour, which was extremely disappointing, but it's also understandable when they were playing for a radio station event. Luckily, they are coming in April to Salt Lake, and yes I will be going. There's no way I can miss it, it would just be a travesty.

By the time everything was over and we got out of the Joint, it was well past midnight. We got to my Uncle's house around 12:30 or 1 a.m., and found they had kicked 3 of their kids out of their beds to accommodate us. We weren't expecting anything more than the couch or the floor as they have a pretty full house, and we were extremely grateful to crash on comfortable beds after a long 4-6 hours of straight standing. Adam and I read a Chapter from the Book of Mormon, got ready for bed, and zonked out. Much to our avail, the alarm went off 5 hours later for us to get up and leave. Starting with this timing, the events for the rest of the day were perfectly aligned to protect us, or at least that's how I see it.

The roads from Las Vegas to St. George were basically perfect. No snow, no real weather, just some wet roads and normal driving. We stopped in St. George and filled up with Gas, another key to events that would occur within hours. We started on our way towards Cedar City, and encountered some weather. We didn't think much of it because we've driven in weather before, and so we were just cruising along. We pulled up behind some cars, and were going a bit fast for the conditions, and that's when things happened. We cut over to pass them, or at least avoid hitting them, and by doing so hit a patch of snow/slush/ice and started losing it. So there we are in the left lane on the freeway going Northbound in between St. George and Cedar, with two cars in the right lane next to us, one behind us, and our car losing control. The back end of our car started coming around to the left, we continued across two both lanes, IN FRONT of the cars, spinning in a 360, missing the cars completely, careening off into the snow on the side of the row, and finally coming to a stop. After our hearts stopped racing, and we were able to change our pants (ok, not really), we realized how lucky we had been. As anyone knows who has driven in winter from St. George to Salt Lake, the roads can be disastrous. Luckily for us, everything happened perfectly where the only real problem, was us being stuck in the snow. My door wasn't openable due to the amount of snow now surrounding us, so Adam got out assessing the situation. A number of other factors occurred unbeknownst to us at the time. The poles that supplement the highway, while not very big, could cause a problem, were behind and in front of us. We split them exactly in the middle. The car stopped about a foot short of a gaping hole, which had our car not stopped where it did, who knows what could have happened. I called my Dad and informed him of what was going on, and he got on the horn with AAA to see if they could get a tow truck to us. Adam tried to flag someone down, but to no avail. Jenn had a shovel, so he started trying to dig us out a bit, but that was completely useless. Someone finally stopped and made sure we were ok, and informed us there was a tow truck behind us a bit pulling someone else out for $50. The clouds parted and the sun started shining a bit, and made things seem just a little bit better. When the tow truck got to us, him NOT pulling us out wasn't an option. He was doing it no matter what. He meant business and was barking orders (and cursing the people who didn't get over or slow down passing him) at Adam (who had taken control to try and get the car out of the snow). My Dad informed us AAA approved pulling us out and they would reimburse him for the service (even though I don't have a card of my own, but I am on the policy as of now….I told my parents to put me on years ago….). He pulled us out, and we were on our way. The car was shaking a bit, and we thought the alignment was off or something. We got to cedar and inspected things and everything seemed ok. We knocked some ice off the tires and wheel wells, and got things as cleaned out as we could, and went on our way. The car "fixed itself" and worked fined the rest of the way, so we figured it was probably just ice buildup or something, and it was shaken off (probably literally) by driving. We made it the rest of the way with no problems, but passed two rollovers (one with an ambulance on site), MANY evidences of people sliding off the road, and many snow plows. We know things could have been so much worse, but they were not. Incidentally, after we initially slid off the road we said a prayer and thanked our Heavenly Father for protecting us and making things happen in the right order and at the right time.

Here is a picture of the Car stuck, and the gaping hole that could have made things so much worse.

Also is a drawing of my rendition of what happened. As I'm not an artist, I do apologize for the squareness of the cars, and the complete lack of scale…..but hey, I'm human J

(Here's a Link to the picture to see it bigger...)

Why does it take something like this to happen to make you realize how much God cares for us? I know he loves me, and I know he cares about my well being and protects and watches over me, but sometimes with the business of life, one forgets. The fact is, no matter how you live your life; God loves us and blesses us when he can. Of course living better makes that line of communication much stronger, but regardless I know he watches over his children. Sometimes I don't feel worthy for blessings like this, but like Adam said, God will bless us no matter what, and loves to bless us when he can. It's like "Man, I thought I was SO CLOSE to being even!!" But in reality, there's no way we will ever be even with him and what he and our savior Jesus Christ have done for us as humanity and children of God.

This weekend taught me a lot. I think the number one thing I learned, is the first line from this post. I'm going to take more opportunities when they present themselves. You never really know what's going to happen, and like Ferris Buhler says "Life moves pretty fast, if you don't take some time enjoy it, it'll pass you right by" (something like that)

On top of everything, I gained a new friend. We all decided (Jennifer, Adam, and I) that we now have no choice but to be friends. That's just what happens when you have experiences like this.

Life needs to be enjoyed. Life needs to be lived. Life is precious, but Life needs to be fun. Experiences need to be had. Asi es la Vida.

Hello World, Small, Big…

2009-12-10T21:58:00.001-07:00

Yes, I am in fact, alive. I realize it has been months since I have last written, and I really meant to write more often than that. School and life just gets the best of you, and you let things slip. For example, my room has been completely neglected. I ran out of clean clothes 2 days ago. Papers and crap is scattered everywhere. Luckily, today was the end of school (classes at least, and that eases things up a bit. Finals just need to be out of the way.

Tonight was the Nuskin yearly Christmas/Holiday party. I love my work; they really know what it means to value their employees. I complain a lot about what I do at work, but that's just my actual job. I love my company, it's the best. This year they gave everyone an iPod shuffle, $100 gift card to Costco, 2 week pay bonus, and there was a really nice dinner involved tonight. I need to be thankful, where I'm getting bonuses and other gifts, other people don't have jobs, or are losing theirs. This hits especially close to home this year. I was working in the Provo store today, and I signed up to donate to Nourish the Children; Nuskin's primary Charity. We were doing it for selfish reasons, to try and win the Ambassador award at the party tonight, but honestly I'm glad I didn't win. It wouldn't have felt right. I need to start giving back to the world, helping people, fulfilling some of my life goals and ambitions.

My American Christianity class taught me a lot; mainly it taught me that the world is full of good people. Brother Fluhman brought in 3 Evangelical friends of his on the last day of our class. We had the opportunity to just ask them any question we wanted as far as lifestyle, beliefs, views, etc. It was just good to know there really are people out there who are striving to be like the savior. As it IS Christmas time, I've been trying more to focus on what Christmas is actually a celebration of, rather than the retail holiday. I don't really know what to ask for Christmas anyway, and seeing how I don't need anything, I'm not remotely worried about it. I'm just going to focus on him, and try and be a better person. That will be my gift to the Lord. I can't ever repay him for what he did for me, but you know, I feel like I'm trying to live the best I can and I know he'll make up for where I lack in my imperfections.

I want to give. That's all I want. I'm done being selfish. The End.

A LIST

2009-10-16T13:57:00.001-06:00

In a tumultuous world full of uncertainty, with good and bad things happening around us, I think it's important to take a second and truly think about all that is going well in our/my life. I know a lot of my posts are negative, and just me complaining, but I've really tried to be positive lately and think about the good things rather than the bad or unhappy. I've decided to make this post (well the remaining part) into a list of those things I am most happy, thankful, and/or appreciative of. This list will be in no specific, I just have a lot of things in my mind and I want to get them written down.

I am Thankful:

For my parents, my family, Love, Peace, kind hearts, the Gospel, a loving Heavenly Father, my savior Jesus Christ, the scriptures, the Temple, knowledge and the ability to learn, the opportunity to go to school, a good job, my cell phone, my computer, my guitar, music period, inspiration, posts from people on Facebook letting me know they care, messages and/or emails from a lost friend telling me they've missed me, being missed, being loved, having good health, having doctors and hospitals ready to take care of me when I'm sick, the opportunity to serve those that are sick and afflicted, a good country and government who is trying to do what they think is the best for us, the fact that no one is perfect and no one can be or ever will, the ability to be perfected in Christ, knowing he is there no matter what, acceptance, humility, feelings of greatness, warm fuzzies, talks about life with friends who listen, Thai food, Wendy's JBC's, Frosty's, Cheesecake, Dad's Bennihannas, Green Shakes, all my roommates being back, the Summer, the beauty of the Winter, Thanksgiving, Christmas, the goodness of people, Samantha Jordan and her understanding of what I need from her, my car, my iPod, new tires, birthdays, celebrations, family parties, weddings, cousins, grandmothers, grandfathers, Fridays, weekends, sleeping in, Sleep, my bed, blankets, the houses I live in, security, comfort, The Goonies, blogging, journals, emotions, the Human Body, free stuff, having money to buy things I need, Ozzy being on a mission, Brent being amazing and an inspiration and example to so many, Camille teaching 1^st graders how to Live life and be good at it, the example my parents have given me, Good Bishops, close friends, confidence, trust, carpet, couches, pianos, trees, flowers, Tiki, the mountains, rivers, the Ocean, scuba diving, Bolivia, the mission I served, the people I helped, and the world going on around me and me being able to take part in it.

I couldn't live without:

My family, especially my Mom and Dad who listen to me and still support me; good roommates, who make living in Provo bearable and fun; technology, giving me the ability to write this and share it with the world, giving me the chance to watch my favorite TV shows without having to watch them ON TV; TV shows, that make me happy and give me a moment to relax from the real life and be fully immersed in a different world.

I don't know where I'd be without:

Anything mentioned above. My parents and what they've done for me. Good friends and the ability to be a good friend. Technology, more specifically the internet, cell phones and cars. The guidance I receive from the temple, and from the Lord. The scriptures and all they can and do teach us.

There really isn't any reason to not be thankful. My list could go on and on, and I think I might make a more specific list and talk about why and how those things have affected me, but for now this will do.

Positive thinking, That's all it takes.....Right?

2009-10-12T07:04:00.004-06:00

So there I was, sitting in church yesterday when a thought came to me. This thought was nothing unusual, and probably something really obvious to most people; the thought was "Be Positive and Happy."

When I was first starting out on my mission, I had a companion Elder Baadsgaard (yes, that really is his last name, and sounds just like you would guess). He was a good kid, and ended up being an assistant later on during our service. We were only companions in the MTC, but he really helped me change a lot and it was through this same idea. He helped me to always see the positive and happy side to things, rather than the negative and unhappy. Again, this is a very obvious solution to some of life's biggest problems, and although it doesn't ACTUALLY solve anything, I truly believe it can be a great influence on anyone's life.

Skip Warner is a guy in my current ward, BYU 206th, BYU 21st Stake (this is just so i can remember, plus I want to start actually remembering people for when I go back and read this 20 years from now). I've NEVER seen him in a bad mood, sad, or down, or just being alone. Of course I've really only seen him in social/church settings, but even in those people sometimes aren't in a good mood or make it apparent they don't want to be there. To me, he is an amazing example of one who is truly trying to (how about that alliteration) follow the Savior. He often gives his testimony on fast Sunday, and did yesterday, which is where this post is stemming from. I didn't realize it at the time, but as I sat in my room last night planning out my busy week, this realization came to me; be positive and happy about my life and the things going on currently. There's just no valid excuse or reason to NOT be happy. He talked about school, and how so many people complain that school sucks and it's hard and annoying, and etc. He said something along the lines of "I enjoyed school while I was in it, sure it was hard, but I had fun. I don't know why anyone else can't do the same." It really is....baffling why I let school get the best of me. It's just school, not like it's going to affect my future at all....ok maybe that's the ONLY purpose. Nevertheless, I'm trying things different this week; I planned my week out, with the things I will do during the day, and am having 3 different people, maybe 4, monitor what I'm doing during the week and checking up on me sporadically, just to make sure I'm on top of things. This may seem somewhat "high school ish" and like i can't be independent, but I really think it will help keep me motivated. It also makes me wonder about the future. There are stats out there, I don't know of any real ones or anything confirmed, that once a person gets married, generally their grades go up. I think it might because of this reason.....they have someone who can be vigilant of their progress, and help them get things done.

I don't love my job, more specifically what I'm required to do everyday; answer phone calls from people in various countries. It's nothing glorious, it's monotonous and tedious, but it pays the bills. The few bills I have. There's just no reason for me to essentially not be happy about being at work. My job REALLY isn't that bad, I make pretty good money to answer the phone all day, the company is amazing, I have a lot of friends here, and with such a high unemployment rate, I HAVE A JOB. I'm blessed, and there's no reason for me not to be positive about that. Plus, I'm only here at work for....5 hours or less a day, not really a sacrifice at all. I just need to learn to organize my time better, and be more productive, efficient, and effective with my time.

Along with this new positive line of thinking, I'm going to start implementing the "Yes" theory. The movie "Yes Man" really has many implications of how much fuller and exciting a persons life could be if they started to say yes to things where they would normally say no. I'm not going to say yes to Persian Wife Finder, but a Yes to a party or a Yes to writing a Paper for no reason other than doing it (BYU has regular writing competitions), would really change my life in so many ways. It would make life feel more productive, more meaningful, and more exciting. Too many times I've found myself sitting at home on a weekend doing nothing more than staring at the wall, or my computer screen. Along those same lines, even IF I am in a home alone situation, hopefully with all these new things, that time would be used more effectively as well.

Along with these new things, I've decided to not be intimated by girls. No one really has any VALID reason to be intimidated; we're all human, we're all imperfect, no one is actually better than anyone or deserves anything less than the best. There's a girl in one of my classes who I've been wanting to ask out essentially from the first day of class. However, because of her obvious intelligence, she scares me more than anyone I've ever wanted to ask out. She's in a pretty intense major, and at BYU where everything is intense ANYWAY, It's not like it's any surprise that she's smart. Plus, being a girl in a heavily male populated major, in an already competitive field, she has to be even more of a genius to fit in. Yesterday in church I attended a "Dating and Relationships" class they have every once in a while. The teachers were the second counselor and his wife, whom have been married probably just over a year. This was the last week of a 4 week session, so they had everyone write down questions they had for them and for the class in general. I asked the question "How do I ask a girl out that intimidates me?" The answer they gave was basically what i wrote above in Bold. There's just no reason to be intimidated. What's the worst that's going to happen; she only has two options: Decline or Accept. Either way, life will move on and that's just how it goes. Jamund (teacher, wife is Carrie....Ferguson) made a good point too: what if everyone else thinks the same thing about her, and she never gets asked out because of this "Intimidation factor?" Break the chain, break the ice, break the cycle. Be different and confident, and things will work out for you.

I guess this post has turned into making some new goals for my life, and even though they aren't specific and don't have time frames, they really are things that I'm going to change which in turn will change who I am. I don't not like who I am currently, I just think there's so much more Jefe for the world to know and discover, and for myself to discover, It's unfair I've been this pent up for so long. Having these goals, these changes, is really making me excited and gives me something to look for. I'm really interested in other ways i can improve my life, to be better at it, and to better the lives of others around me. Isn't that one of our main objectives here on Earth? To progress and better ourselves and those around us? Seems simple enough, so why don't I or other people do it constantly? I guess that's part of figuring out who we are and what we stand for. I'm 25 and just barely starting to figure it out.

My 24th year of living, "Things Sure were different 25 years ago"

2009-10-06T07:05:00.007-06:00

I'm 25. I seriously can't believe it; I really don't feel that much older. I suppose from October 3rd to October 4th, I'm still only a day older; but it feels like oh so much more.

I've been meaning to write, but couldn't think of anything I wanted to write. A review of my 24th year will be the best thing I think, for myself and for others.

School. I'm still in it, as much as I dislike the whole idea. I know it's necessary though and have finally decided to stick with a major. Communication Disorders, although a heavily female populated major, is what I have chosen to stick with. I started it last winter semester and even though I still didn't do that well in one of the core classes, I feel like it's where I should be at this time. I know I just need to get done with school, then move on to grad school, or whatever else life throws at me. I've already written about my classes this semester, so I won't go into depth with that. Currently I'm scheduled to graduate December of 2011, basically a year longer than I originally expected. The reasons for this vary, but the biggest is probably because i started the major so late. Byu thinks it's a good idea to offer certain classes only certain semesters, and to make you take classes in a certain order, and because of this I can only finish as fast as i can.

Mosiah 4:27 : "And see that all these things are done in wisdom and ^aorder; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order."

At least I have the end in "sight," it's closer than I think, I just wish it were closer. Of course after I finish my undergrad, Grad school will happen, but I've heard grad school is alot more chill than Undergrad. All in good time.

Work. I'm still at Nuskin, still working in the call center, still a peon. I've tried to obtain and applied to various jobs, but with no success to my avail. Of course when I didn't obtain a position, and after so long, and feeling that I more or less deserve it or am at least qualified, it's been hard to be motivated to stay here. Right now in the world I live in, its a good thing to have a job at all. I've also tried to look at the whole situation in a long run/positive way. Had I obtained the last position I applied for, I wouldn't have been able to take classes this semester, and it would take me even longer to finish school. So i'm grateful to have the job that I do, get paid the amount I do, and work for such a great company. I think there's more at work than myself with this one.

Dating and relationships. Since my birthday last year, 2008, when Camille broke up with me 3 days before, I have had 2 relationships: Chelsea Wrathall, and Kat Miller. Both of them were great relationships, and I learned a lot about myself, who I am, and what I want in a future eternal companion. Dating still isn't fun, well the drama that comes with dating at least; for this reason I haven't dated much lately, but have decided I need to get back on the bandwagon and get er done. I feel like my next step in life is to find a wife, and move on. I'm 25, and even by "worldly" standards, 25 is an old enough age to be serious about finding a wife. It's been on my mind a lot and I know it's important enough to be one of my top priorities. My Mom told me the other day she was reading my mission letters, and the the last one I wrote before leaving talked about me getting married within 2 years. I've been home almost 4 (January will mark that time frame), so its time I get on it. My cousin Sterling Davis was married last week, October 1, and he hasn't even been home from his mission a year yet. If he can do it that fast, why can't I right? I have a goal to be married BEFORE Austin gets home from his mission. So before or by June 3rd 2011.

Big or significant events. There hasn't been very many significant or big events in the last year that are extremely note worthy, but I can think of a few. I think the biggest thing was Austin leaving on a mission, June 3rd, 2009. Not that I ever doubted he would go, I just didn't know much he would get into it or what the feel would be. So far, 4 months down the road, I've been nothing but Impressed. It's so amazing the change I can see and feel from him, just from his letters. Before he left I spent a lot of time at home, and many weekends just to be around and support him as he was preparing to go. Even before he left, I saw him go through some pretty intense changes that most missionaries go through after having been out for some time.All I can say is that I'm extremely proud of who he is becoming and of the spirit and power that emanate from his letters. We write back and forth sometimes just between us, personal things, and advice for one or the other. I think he is learning to relate more to me than anyone else in the family since I'm a "recent" RM. It's been a great experience for him, the family and myself as well. Other than that, except for a few trips, nothing too exciting happened in the last year. Camille is still dating Brandon, who's a good guy, I just don't know what's going to happen with that one. Brent is a genius. He nailed a 32 on the ACT, WITHOUT STUDYING......seriously, how did the genes skip me? He's 16 now, driving, and starting to date. I feel old. My parents both turned 50 this year (2009), which makes me feel even weirder seeing how I'm exactly have their age, by number at least. As my Grandma would say, according to my Dad, "Things sure were different 25 years ago"

As I continue to live life and try to be good at it, I will make goals for the next year, goals which i will complete when they are within my power. I never really make goals, and maybe that's why my life is usually uneventful. More coming soon.

Children; One day I will have my own, but they will have instruction books

2009-09-18T22:56:00.002-06:00

It's interesting the experiences we have as human beings. Last week while driving to Lagoon for our company party, the girl that was with my roommate made an observation I hadn't ever considered before. There are 6 billion people on earth (I'm inserting that number, I think she just said "a lot"), and every single person has their own story and feelings and things going on in their life, and there is absolutely no way for me to know or understand EVERY single one of them. It's really mind boggling to think about the immensity of the scale of knowledge one would have to obtain to understand that many people. It really makes me wonder how God can do it; it literally seems completely impossible. But I know that he does do it, and he does know each and every one of us, and sends us people in our lives to learn lessons. The lesson from tonight came from Garrett Godsey.

Lj was a roommate of mine from about January-November of 2007, give or take. Roommates are interesting things. They are all different (such as noted above), and everyone has their own story. LJ is a bigger guy, not big fat, but tall and bulky; he's balding in his early age, but by no means is an old man. He's a pretty funny guy, who makes anyone around him feel comfortable and welcome. LJ married Michelle Messinger November 2, 2007, and ever since then I don't get to see much of them. However, they are good friends and I do what I can to make the effort to see them every once in a while. They had a baby 7 months ago, whose name is Garrett.

Today, September 18, 2009, is LJ's Bday. He is 2 weeks and 2 days older than me, but to me he seems much older. He's a good guy, really, and I appreciate his friendship. I was talking to Michelle the other day about what she was planning to do for his birthday and she told me she wasn't really planning much, but I could come over to have dinner with them and celebrate. I was trying to think of the best thing I could give them, and I thought the probably most relaxing and relieving thing would be to watch Garrett while they went out to a movie or something fun they probably haven't done for a long time. I wasn't terribly worried about it since I like kids, and I'm generally pretty good with them.

They left the apartment and I was just watching TV, Garrett was mulling around on the floor doing his own thing; I don't think he even noticed they were gone. About ten minutes after they left, I picked him up and played with him for a minute, and walked him around, did the things I'd seen LJ doing to make him feel comfortable. Then he started crying. I honestly didn't know what to do; Michelle told me he would probably be hungry pretty soon, and to make him a bottle, so I did such. He wouldn't eat it and in fact, he wouldn't even lean back to eat. The only thing I could do to keep him from crying was to walk around holding him. If I sat down at all, or even motioned to sit down, he'd start right back up again. Kelsey told me she would come accompany me to babysit him with me since she likes kids and was ok with it since she didn't have other plans. He quieted down more for her. I swear girls just have the special touch….it's no wonder a baby is birthed from a woman, they know what they're doing. In the end, we still couldn't get him to stop crying or eat, or do anything. We were looking around in his room and walked out, and there stood LJ and Michelle. I guess their movie was sold out, so they just rented one and came home. I was kinda relieved to see them so soon, but also bummed out that they didn't get to spend some time together just the two of them. Of course when Mommy showed up, Garrett stopped crying and all was well. Kids learn from a young age to shape up when their parents are around. J

Honestly I was ok, I wasn't like freaking out or anything and I'm sure I would have figured something out eventually. Garrett is a funny baby and a good kid too. I've been around him when he's just fine and doing his own thing. It truly amazes me though, how Michelle REALLY knew EXACTLY what to do. When I was talking to LJ about it, he jokingly said "You know, when you get married and have a baby, they give you instruction books in the hospital about what to do every circumstance. It's not like we learned this on our own." It really made me think, a lot, about what we as human beings are capable of. In my language development class we've been talking about basic language and how a child learns to speak. There are many theories behind how a baby learns anything, and one of them is simply put "Human Beings are "wired" with an ability to learn." Now there is debate on whether or not babies are wired to learn how to speak, or just wired to learn….and because people speak around them, they pick it up because of that ability. It's not like it's a super power, but in a way it is. Watching Garret tonight trying to take steps with the help of his Dad, it really blew me away….how something so simple to the average person is something actually extremely complex. To take one step, the brain has to think "left foot forward, now right," etc. But it's really so much more than that. What IS a foot….does the brain know what a foot PHYSICALLY IS, or does it just know "the thing on the end of the long thing on the bottom of this thing I'm controlling, needs to move with the long thing attached to it." I don't know how a person could look at a human body and not believe there is a stronger force out there putting it all together.

This blog took a direction I wasn't really planning on, but I like the outcome of it and the flow of what I was trying to get across. I really wish when I have kids they would come with instruction books. That would be pretty much amazing. But I guess the real instruction book is confidence in the Lord and doing what is right and being lead by the spirit to help raise the soul he has entrusted you. Wow I'm deep. Go me.

Blogging For Credit, That is Extra

2009-09-17T08:17:00.003-06:00

I have an English Class, 316-Technical Communication, where my teacher informed us if we keep a journal or a blog, he would give us Extra Credit. He wants us to write at least once a week, and since I already have a blog AND I haven't been updating like I should be, it's good motivation to do so.

This Entry is just going to be my classes and what they are and how I feel about them thus far in the semester.

ComD 331-Clinical Phonetics: Taught by Dr. Shawn Nissen, whom I had for Speech Anatomy last winter semester, should be interesting. The lectures up until now have been more or less a slight review of Speech Anatomy, which isn't necessarily that great since I didn't do terribly well in that class last semester. However, having taken a Spanish Phonetics class, it will be interesting to see the difference in technical parts of language between Spanish and English. The Lectures haven't actually been terribly boring, and overall Nissen teaches pretty well. We have Lecture twice a week (M, W 1-1:50), and then a lab on Friday (various possible times). Expected Grade, from knowledge of Nissen's Exams and my past phonetics experience, and level of interest: B

ComD 330 - Language Development: Taught by Dr. Martin Fujiki. Under circumstances of being taught by a different teacher, I would say this class would be really interesting and captivating. However, under Dr. Fujiki, it unfortunately is not. I actually find the material quite intriguing, since Language is something we all just....know....and to think that it also has to develop in some way, is interesting. Fujiki has the most monotone voice i've ever heard, and the worst part, he know it and doesn't do anything to change it!! I guess when you get stuck in a rut, or get stuck in your ways, it's pretty hard to change; you would think a TEACHER would at least try to captivate their class. The good thing about this class is having people I actually know to keep me company, awake, and help me do well. Justin Morgan, Christina Saurers, and Liam Clancy (whom i also have 331 with, and was in SA last year with me) are all in the class together. Hopefully this can make up for the yawn-ness of a class. Expected Grade: B or higher. (only because of how boring it is.......)

American Christianity: Taught by John Fluhman. This class is AWESOME!!!!!! Basically it is what it sounds like, Christianity in America, but as far as I can tell, it will hardly be about the LDS church. The class is HUGE, and I believe for the reason that as LDS students, most people don't really know much of anything about other religions, let alone their own.....maybe we know about the LDS church....but where Christianity stems from, and the importance of background before Joseph Smith, not at all. On top of it, the teacher is extremely animated and exciting to listen to. Luckily i have this class AFTER Fujiki....so it makes up for the boringness of the former. Too bad i don't have it before, i'm sure it would make Fujiki more bearable. Expected Grade: B+ or A-

English 316 - Technical Communication: Taught by Nate Jackson. I've never really been a huge fan of English classes, but I think this will be the one during my career at BYU that I'll actually enjoy all the way through. My teacher, ironically, works full time in the Marketing department at Nuskin, and is a Part Time teacher. Major props....i'm pretty sure that's crazy. Then again, he only teaches one class (mine) and there are literally like...20 students...less than that. However, there is one specific Kid in my class that makes it freaking Hilarious. I'm not sure he's 100% in the head, I think he might have a slight handicap, So he just says things sometimes and gets so excited, it's pretty much the funniest thing ever. This is the class i'm actually going to be blogging for, which hopefully will get me back into the rhythm. Expected Grade: B+ or A.

Stats 221 - Principles of Statistics - I'm just going to say one thing. Gross. I'm not excited about this class, At ALL....ZERO excited. But i guess if I HAVE to take it.........I will........At least i have some conocidos in the class....but that doesn't help much to motivate me to go. But I go. I go, because I need to go, I have to Go. So I go. Expected Grade. B as well.

I Have a Bowling Class, but that doesn't start until halfway through the semester. Should be fun. hopefully an Easy A......

The semester is almost 3 full weeks in. It ends on December 10, well at least classes do. Finals run through the 18th. I'm really trying extra hard this semester to get to ALL of my classes...yes I've already missed a couple, but I'm really trying to dedicate myself to going to every class, that is required. This is My goal. Only miss the classes I literally can't make it to. (Circumstances being: Out of Town, Work, Being too ill to leave my house, Family functions *Weddings, etc.*)

I really do enjoy blogging. It helps me relax some....to get things off my mind, and also share with the world. I know i need to put more pictures on....but i'm just not a picture saavy person. Plus every time i put pictures on, i can never get it to look exactly like i want. I hate the parameters the internet has....i guess it HAS to, to work, but i think someone should invent some way to make it like a piece of paper, where i just draw what i want, write what i want, WHERE i want. THAT would be an awesome Blog template. Times ten, plus pollo.

Schoooooooooool..........

2009-09-01T20:23:00.002-06:00

This Is how i feel.

School starting always leaves me with so many mixed emotions.....I'm actually quite relieved not to be BORED out of my mind everyday, but at the same time, i'm not terribly excited about going to class and having homework. Actually, homework won't be so bad. I honestly just dislike physically going to class. By the time you drive to campus, or walk, whatever, then hike 8 miles it seems, then get to class and you're only there for less than an hour.....it seems like alot of effort for nothing. At least that's how i feel :) But i'm actually ok with my classes this semester. Only ONE of my classes i know of now, i don't know someone. It's nice to have an acquaintance in class....it just makes it easier. I'll report more as the semester goes.

GET TO IT!!!

Boating is never......Typical...or Mabey it is...but it's Lake Powell right? (Second Title: Way To Be on Top of it....)

2009-08-17T09:28:00.000-06:00

For anyone that has a boat,
or goes boating, knows that with toys comes problems. My family has been boating since i was basically a baby, and even though we haven't had a boat my whole life, we've had one off and on more recently than not.

The Last boat we had was a Cruiser, 28 foot, with a cabin and everything else. Heat, A/C, Fridge, Bathroom, everything anyone would need. It wasn't at all a houseboat, but you could essentially live on it. I've always wanted to go on a house boat, but i just haven't ever had the chance. If anyone wants to invite me, i'd be more than willing to accompany them :)

So the boat we have now, well actually it's not even ours, is a 24 foot cobalt that my uncle bought from an old neighbor/friend of ours. The main difference is it being an open Bow. (is that the right form/word for bow?) The main problem with an open bow is the non-escape from the sun, whereas with a cabin boat, you can escape it. We knew this would be different and maybe a problem, but we were ready to go for it anyway.

So as i stated before, Boating and toys=something usually goes wrong. We decided to leave on Thursday July 16th, in order to get down to Powell and maybe even go out on Thursday night. Well of course timing is everything, so by the time we got to Powell and checked into the hotel (somehow they had "canceled" our reservations...Problem #1, but easily overcome), the sun was already going down. We decided that since we already had paid for the slip for Thursday night, we would hurry and launch the boat and get it in. So we back the boat down the ramp, get it in the water, and try to start it....Dead. Absolutely NO battery power at all. FUN! So there we are at about 8:30, the ramp closes at 9, it's getting dark, other boats are pulling off, and ours is dead in the water, at least it was still on the trailer. So my uncle pulls a battery charger/jumper cable thing out, and hooks it up to the battery. We let it sit for a second, and....nothing. The batteries were that dead. Apparently somehow the radio, vhf not like music radio, had been left on thus draining the batteries. Completely no juice left. (Way to be on top of it us.....) So my Dad walks over to another boat that was just launching as well and asked if they could help jump us....jumping a boat is NOT easy either. PLUS, the guy was pulling the trailer out meaning his wife was in the boat to help us....since she really didn't know how to drive the boat that well, it was even more fun to pull her up along side us. I jump into her boat, (Crawling over carts and cases and boxes and boxes of alcohol...seriously were they there to boat or to get drunk? Couldn't they just as well gotten drunk at home? Somehow i don't think that Drinking and boating go too well together....some people.....)...to catch it and hook up the cables, and we let it sit for a second, still, nothing. So i then proceed into her boat and rev the engine up a bit in neutral, since she didn't know how to do it, and BAM it started. FINALLY. So after like an hour after putting the boat in the water, we got it started.

We back off the trailer, my Dad pulls it out, and goes to park it. Well....now it's dark, so we need to turn the lights on right? Guess what, they don't work! MORE FUN!! We figured out that the red/green light bulb was burned out. Then the spot light didn't work, but that was the cigarette lighter adapter thing. Anyway, we were basically floating in the dark. But we had a mag light, so it was ok!. So we decide to try and find where the slips are (this is the first time we've ever been to Wawheap (Sp?) Marina so we had no idea where they were or where to go. You'd think it'd be easy, but in the dark, it was extremely difficult. We motored around but got into shallow water in the bay and decided almost to just dock by the ramps. We pull up and there's another boat hanging out who was kind enough to lead us over to the slips. So we dock the boat for the night, and head up to our hotel room. Day 1 down.

Day 2. We woke up kinda late if i remember and went down to the restaurant for a the supposed "Breakfast to die for" as Jenn had been told. I didn't think it was that great, i mean not bad or anything, but definitely not to die for. After Breakfast we went out to finally go boating, exciting right? Well we get on the boat, and get everything ready to go, thinking all is fine. The Boat starts fine, sounds fine, it's a wonderful nice day out, problems ended last night right? Wrong. So we pull open the engine compartment, for something random, and notice water leaking from somewhere in the engine compartment. So we're thinking a broken hose or something since it was lake water. So after trying to figure it out for like half hour, then going to the CRAPPIEST Marina parts store EVER, (Good Job being crappy store) and calling the mechanic who....TUNED UP the boat...Way to be on top of it Mechanic......we decided that it would be ok to continue the trip. Even knowing there were problems with the boat, having been informed they weren't imminent, we didn't actually have any problems the rest of the time. It seems though, every time i can remember, there always has to be SOMEthing wrong with the boat/snowmobiles (which we no longer have), etc.

So even though the boating went fine, other things just....yeah...something, there's always something right?

The next day we went to breakfast again at the hotel restaurant. We were expecting about the same service as the day before, but did we get it? what do you think? This is about how it went:

Server: "Hi how are you guys today, what can i get for you?"

US: We order. I get the buffet (Smartest move any of us made probably on the trip), and get my food.

40 minutes later: Uncle Dan "Lets ask this other kid to see where our food is...."

our Waiter to Jenn: "Ok. here is your egg, and unfortunately we didn't have any English Muffins, so i made the liberty of making you wheat toast..."

Jenn: "Umm...ok. But i wanted White Toast, and do i get the rest of the food i ordered? I ordered the "Powell Special" (equivalent to like a grand slam at Denny's), and i wanted scrambled eggs...."

Waiter leaves, and then takes 9 years to come back. Mean while, i get up and get Jenn some White Toast from the buffet, and my sister eggs with cheese in them since the bus boy somehow thought she was done with a full plate of eggs, and took them away.

Way to be on top of it Hotel Restaurant, that was supposedly "To DIE FOR..." Yeah we almost died waiting and in hunger. Good job. High Five!!

In the end we didn't pay for my buffet because the waiter realized what a crap job he did, but i guess it happens. It's amazing what you pay for at a Vacation Destination. For example: $54 for items for lunch, including a $12 tube of Sunscreen, 2 bags of ice at $4.50 each, and other food items. it was pretty much ridiculous. But you go on vacation, and you have to pay what they ask. Oh well.Yes, this was a PB & J that was part of a $54 lunch ticket. Although the food was only like probably $10 of it. Good times. Oh this is also where the waitress informed us "Oh yeah, they have a full on restaurant there and everything." The restaurant was.....a store, and an ice cream/snack bar thing.

That night we docked the boat and decided to go into Page for dinner. For some reason we were all craving Taco Bell, easy & fast right? WRONG!!! We pull up to the T Bell, and walk up to the door, which was locked. Odd. The hours on the door say they were open until 9 (SERIOUSLY? 9!?!?!) It was like 8:45, so we should have been fine right? There are a TON of people inside, so my Dad knocks on the door and someone lets him in. We walk in, and it's just a disaster, it looks like no one has cleaned for like 2 weeks. Food on the tables, garbage everywhere, and PEOPLE everywhere. WHAT THE HECK is going on?!?! We walk up to the counter and this is the response we get:

Lady at the counter: "Hi. So, if you want to order you can, but it'll be a 40-45 minute wait on your food."
Dad: "What....ok....umm bye"

Way to be on top of it Taco Freakin BELL!!

HOW!!! At TACO BELL!?!?!?!?!? Wow....FUN! It turns out, i Think at least, it was a Customer Appreciation day or something, so they were way backed up. Whatever I guess. So we went to Denny's, where we actually ate food and had good service. I guess there were SOME snags at Denny's. The 3 girls ordered Chicken Noodle soup, easy right? No, they were out. Way to be on top of it Denny's. Ok they did fine in the end, but i'm sure the timing (after trying to even get INTO the Denny's parking lot alone...was time consuming) would have been about the same. Although, i do love the new Chicken Burritos from Taco Bell. .89 cents, awesome burrito. No complaints there. But i'll never wait 45 minutes for one. No way.

On top of ALL this, Kelly had a pretty fun Friday night. We're on our way to Paige, page? not sure how to spell it. Anyway, on our way to paige Kelly gets a voice message, or gets a call, or something. No, Uncle Dan got a call from ADT saying that Kelly's garage alarm had been tripped. So to make things even more fun she had to call them back and see what was going on. It turned out to be her roommates sister, whom Kelly was unaware was staying at the house, trying to get in. The great thing, about everyone one of the people we "left" at home knew about it and was basically on their way. Ben, my Mom, Marge, i'm sure her Home Teachers, Bishop, The Pool man, Easter Bunny and probably a few random people were informed too. We love Kelly :) At least she doesn't have to worry about being left in the dark.

Really, Way to be on top of it ADT. That's what we have security for right? At least that's comforting.

I think the absolute Highlight of the trip was my Dad. Apparently a few weeks prior to this trip he was with his scouts or whatever and trying to order food at subway. He says this was about how the conversation went at the register:

Dad: "Ok so that's 12 subs, $5 a piece, so $60 right? Also can we get two bottles of water?
Guy behind Counter: "Total seven tuuoo" "water you want?"
Dad: "Brent, please speak to him in SPANISH and tell him we want two bottles of water"
Brent: "Dad, that's rude"
Dad: "Tell him it's RUDE to not Speak MY LANGUAGE when he lives in MY COUNTRY"

Ok, i don't know if the last line was true, but i wouldn't doubt it. The funny thing is he's had this mass run in with people not being able to speak english, and is getting pretty fed up. Every chance we had this trip he made sure we knew. It's a good thing the guy at the Restaurant (please see above) spoke English, or he probably would have thrown him out the window. We love my Dad too :) ( LEARN SPANISH DAD!!)

So either my Dad and the rest of America needs to learn Spanish, or everyone needs to learn English...since there are more than Spanish speakers flooding our country. Way to be on top of it immigrants.

I can't think of any other incidents that happened to us while we were there. I'm pretty sure there were some, like certain couples not getting along, but that happens :), and i can't think of any at this moment, and this post has been in the making for like a month or more. If any of you reading this can remember, let me know k? Despite all the problems and crap we had to go through, Lake Powell was just as awesome as it could have been. It was amazing weather almost the whole time, the water was amazing and clear, and warm. The sun was amazing, i got a nice tan while everyone else got burned. I love my awesome tanning ability :)

This Is why lake Powell was Worth it. Oh, so worth it

The rainbow bridge. I haven't ever been here, that i can remember. Supposedly i came when i was a little kid, and back in the day you could basically swim underneath it. You have to walk 2/3 a mile to get there now, and when it's 105 degrees....it's almost not worth, but still pretty Cool. Pretty sure we all got heat stroke on Saturday afternoon. everyone started getting grumpy and no one wanted to do anything, so we found a cove and jumped in to cool off. Happened more than once, and i don't think i've drank so much water in my life.

Yeah, We were Definitely on Top of it this trip.....Ok maybe less than NOT AT ALL. But hey, you know, after like what, 20 years?, boating, you think we'd have learned. But it's been awhile since we had a boat, and we are re learning :)

I'll Have you Knowe (Like the English way....)

2009-07-02T00:43:00.007-06:00

I was at Wal-Mart the other day, and noticed all the toy impossible-claw machines were titled

"Toy Shoppe"

First of all, shouldn't it be called Suck your money into a hole-waste of time-trying to impress a girl-impossible claw thing-Shop? Second......What? Where the CRAP did ShopPE come from? AREN'T WE IN AMERICA? Maybe i've been spelling it wrong as "Shop" all my life...anyway, hence the title.

So I know i haven't written anything for a REALLY long time, but i just wanted to inform all those....probably 3 people that read this....that i had my first banjo lesson today, from this guy....

Geoff Hohwald

Man, What a guy. First of all, what a sweet name. I think i was actually going to be a Geoff, but my Grandma feared i would hate it and convinced my parents to just go normal Jeffrey. Maybe i should change my name to Geoff? Opinions?

When i got my Banjo, I received with it an Instructional DVD and Book (The book is lost...) So since i didn't really have any other way to learn, i put it into my computer And Geoff taught me for a while. The Banjo is weird....So if anyone has any Pointers on playing the banjo, to make it feel easier or more comfortable let me know. I don't want to make it feel like the guitar, but any similarities would be awesome. I'm guessing there's not though. It's probably one of those things that takes getting used to. I tried to think of a good example, but it's late and i can't think. My brain is dead. Sorry this is all you get for now.

Ok i lied. I recently discovered a secret truth....i think alot of people know so it probably isn't much of a secret, but really Restaurants will make you whatever you want. It happened the other day at Wingers, and tonight at IHOP.....i'm going to start making up things i want and make servers make me special orders. (It's kind of like the exceptions thing at my own work. People think we have a rule and like the "System" or "computer" won't let us budge from that rule. But 99% of the time, it's just a rule and can be bent.) Because i'm the customer, and the customer is always right. Even though today at work I am 100% sure that the company was right and the customer was just completely insane and dumb and should never call us again.

I seriously WONDER how some people live so long in this life, not knowing how to live life and be good at it. Really. I'm not a pro, but i think i'm getting pretty good at it. I treat people right, I don't drive insane (ok only on occasion has Reagan had any reason to call me a utah driver...), I'm honest with people, i understand situations and what i'm doing in them, and if i don't, i don't act like an IDIOT trying to figure them out. Casual is what makes the world go round. All the people tied up in politics and debates, and unnecessary stressful situations, are wasting their time. Well that's my opinion...not sure where that came from. But it's true! Ok we are ALL children of the Same God, but sometimes i wonder if some of us were adopted from another God of Another Planet :)

PS. I Read today that Boozer is signing with the Jazz for this year. I really think they need to just get rid of him. Steve thinks he'll get traded, and i think that would be awesome. Then we can sign Millsap, he can develop more, and him and DWILL (if he actually stays with Utah) can dominate and destroy the Lakers. Ok it's a dream i know. Dreaming is good right?

PSS. My Rays are catching the Yankees. This is good news and makes me happy.

Pictures? Family is cool.

2009-05-12T13:36:00.009-06:00

I have a fellow blogging friend that said Pictures make a Blog Awesome. I think this has a lot of truth to it....and i rarely ever upload pictures. Probably because i don't take many? But i love photography and have a good video camera, that also takes pictures, so it leaves me question myself....why am i not taking more pictures. Ok. I will start

I also discovered hanging out with my brothers is quite enjoyable. Especially when you go to wal-mart, and the brother (Brent) you are with, had to get up at 5 am...on a Saturday...to go to Drivers Ed...and didn't sleep after. Yeah. Quite Loopy, but makes for a pretty funny experience. Even choosing Ice Cream can be a chore...... I'm actually kinda wondering what it will be like when Austin goes on a mission. I've gone on a mission, and i remember the letters and reactions of my family when i left. I hope i can be a good letter writer and supporter, because missionaries need that...especially from Family.

Also, Since when did "hair care" things get put in a completely different section in Wal-mart? Apart from the "Home" section, which includes things such as towels and bathroom stuff..... Wouldn't hair products, such as the Brush i bought (my hair is getting out of control, and i realized i had never purchased a brush in my life), fall under the "Home" Category?.
(Yes, this is the first brush i've ever purchased.....Go Me)

I really want Thai food. Any takers? I think i need to learn to make Thai Food. That would be stellar....but i don't think it would turn out nearly as well.

I want an Adventure. But I am afraid to take a step into the unknown. Not really. Kat Taught me, well tried teaching me, that I need to just dive in head first....(or feet first?)....sometimes. I think she's right. I'm going to do something, extreme, sometime soon. Before July. I promise. I just need to "plan" it. Maybe it'll involve moving...i doubt that, but who knows right?

PS. The New Green Day CD Is freaking AMAZING!!!

Summer 2009 Goal

2009-05-06T00:21:00.006-06:00

My Goal is not:

1. To be Stewie Griffin.
2. Eat a Straw of wheat
3. Sit on a Box...maybe i will though, just for fun.
4. Have a football shaped head.

My Goal IS:

Learn The Banjo.

Of course i have other goals i would like to accomplish this summer as well, but The Banjo has been sitting there collecting dust for way too long. So It's gunna happen.

It's Been So long. Hi......This is it....well for now, it's Me.

2009-04-27T03:18:00.003-06:00

Hello All you Blog readers!!! It's currently 3:38 AM, and i'm at work. End of Month, covering calls from Spain. It's quite fantastic really. I get to sit here and do basically whatever i please for about 4 or 5 hours, until the normal markets open. I'm currently watching the move "Atonement," and doing this as well. I know it feels like I've been away for....ages....I thought it had only been a matter of weeks, but apparently it's been over a month....and the last post i wrote was short and sweet. So even longer since I've really hounded anything out. This last semester kept me crazily busy, so busy I never realized I was that busy until the semester ended and I had nothing to worry about. I realize now too that I even let some of my friendships slide down the hill a bit, nothing irreparable. I'll be ok. I think?

I don't really know where to start. School is over, Thank goodness. I don't think i'll end up with HORRIBLE grades. I know for a fact in my Speech Anatomy class I didn't do well, at all, but i am pretty sure I'll at least end up passing the class. Sometimes that's all that really matters right? I had a teacher who made a good point once. When you are a professional "Whatever," and you have a masters or a PHD in this field of "Whatever," no one is going to care in any way whatsoever what grades you got in you undergrad courses. Of course grades do relate somewhat to where you go to Grad school, which could also in turn matter when you get your PHD and people don't recognize it unless from a certain school, but in the end it's just the same. Education is important. I love learning, i just don't test well. I've known that my whole life, and I guess that's how it's always going to be.

My brother got his mission call to the Arizona, Tucson mission. I cannot believe it is already time for my little brother Ozzy to go on a mission. I've been home now off of mine for 3 years and almost 5 months. So it's been 5 1/2 years since i was getting ready for mine, like my brother is now. I had the opportunity to go through the temple with him for his first time last Friday, the 17th, and had a pretty amazing experience. You know how the Lord will answer things for you when you aren't really looking for an answer to any particular question? Or maybe you don't.....it's kind of crazy actually how he does things sometimes. I was just excited to finally get back to the temple, I hadn't been since December sometime. The Lord in his tender mercies decided it fit for me to received probably the strongest testimony of temples and the importance of them, that anyone could ever have. I haven't had any kind of strong spiritual experience since being on my mission, that I had in the temple that day. The strangest thing of the whole ordeal, as i mentioned above, was the fact that i was not expecting anything like this to happen at all. The Lord knows what he's doing, that much i know for sure. He puts things in your path and people in your life to help you gain an understanding of simple things, complex things, small things, large things, anything really that he wants you to understand. And in ways you wouldn't expect, at all, in fact, in ways you would think completely the opposite.

I gained a new Friend this past semester, a Friend that was one of the unexpected things/people referred to above. She was in my ASL class, for the entire semester, and only the last 3 or 4 weeks or so did we even become real friends at all. She is a very good friend to me now, and we've already shared alot together. I know she trusts me and i trust her. She is the reason i was able to gain such a strong testimony of the temple. I really don't know honestly if anything will really ever happen with her, and that's ok, since sometimes people come into your life for a short season and for a particular reason (no rhyme intended :) ) and once that reason has come and passed, i suppose it's possible to 'lose' that friend, although in my case i hope to never lose her as a friend. I don't lose, or let go of, friends very easily. Probably one of my stronger...downfalls...or maybe it's a strength. I just know what it means to have a good friend, and i appreciate those that i care about and care about me the most.

This movie is weird.

I'm still at my job. I considered quitting for the summer and going to install security systems. I decided against it though more because i feel it important to be around to spend some time with my brother before he leaves. I know i've threatened to quit Nuskin for...like 2 years now...or longer...probably longer....but i just can't seem to get away. I keep applying for jobs, and not getting them, but when i find out who got the job, it makes sense and i agree they were better qualified for the job. If anyone knows of any actual good, real, jobs for me. Let me know k :)

I guess this is where I come to an end. I know this isn't really alot for over a month of no writing, but the fact is I just have come to a blank. It tends to happen when you're at work at 3 am.

I'm alive

2009-03-07T23:40:00.003-07:00

I'm not dead, or dying, or anything similar. I'm sure no one reads this...but in case you do, don't worry, I'll be writing something soon. I kind of have a lot to write about actually. Just be patient :)

I attempted a mustache a while ago. This is as gross as i let it get.

aLL i wAnTeTh: SoMe tHiNgS

2009-02-19T23:05:00.002-07:00

I've decided all I want, is to Serve people. I came to this realization two nights ago after talking to a friend who is/was going through a really really rough time right now. All I could think of was how much I really want to help them in SOME way or form. I do realize though, that this is almost a selfish desire….I love the way I feel when I help someone, or serve…which is normal, but is it bad for me to have a desire to have that feeling always? I dunno. I think this is why I want to become a doctor, or a physician, or a therapist in SOME way or form. I just want people's lives to be better because of something I did to help them. It's a selfish, but good desire, I just need to figure out a way to do it….I know there are a billion places I could volunteer at, and I really should look into those. It's just a matter of doing it.

I want to go on a service "mission" thing or something…an opportunity to serve people again. My aunt recently gave me the number to a girl she wanted to set me up with. I made a date with her, but then had to cancel it because I was deathly…ok not really…but I was sick. Now, she's in Honduras doing medical stuff….I WANT TO DO THAT!!! Man I wish I were smart, like my brother Brent. 15 years old, and got a freaking 32…THIRTY TWO on the ACT, withOUT studying!! GEEEEEEEEEZE!!! But in all honesty, I'm quite proud of the fellow. Good job Brent.

I need to get better at going to school. Enough said.

How can I get the guts up to actually just walk up to a girl, or anyone for that matter, and just talk to them? This has always been an extreme mystery to me. I have never met a person that can actually walk up to someone, and just blatantly start talking to them. I mean it doesn't even have to be about meeting someone of the opposite sex, just being able to make friends I guess? My roommate and I were discussing this today, that it seems hard to make friends sometimes…especially of the same gender. You'd think it wouldn't be since that's all a youngin would do, or even kids in highschool. I dunno. It just baffles me.

I like my Lucky Jeans. I decided that tonight. That's all I wear now…I have 4 pair. But only wear two of them really. They are sweet.

I want a new guitar. Preferably a Martin, or an ovation. I just want a partner for Samantha Jordan. Yes that's my guitars name. She is my one true love, who always makes me happy and never angers me, or plays games, or gets frustrated at me. She knows me and I know her. She's great.

I love my family. I realized this when we went to Dinner for my Dad's Bday. He turned 50. Holy crap…I'll be half his age this year….that's nuts…what's more, I'll be a quarter century old. Yikes. Happy Birthday Father Dearest! We just have fun together…Camille is dating Brandon, he's a good kid, and I really think and actually hope it works out. They just are a good couple, and would be happy together. Austin will be going on a mission soon. His papers are in, so he should have his call here pretty soon…which is absolutely insane, and I've already mentioned the genius Brent Above. And Tiki is as loveable as ever. I love my Mom and the talk we had a few nights ago in the car. She is such a good Mother and I Loveth her.

I like Rockband 2. It's pretty much amazing. Especially playing with our new roommate Reagan, who is better than I am, but still it rocks. Actually, he bought an xBox 360 tonight. So now we have all 3 of the next gen systems…PS3, Xbox360, and the WII. I also just finished playing Zelda, Ocarina of Time tonight. I love that game, one of the best ever made.

I loveth my friends. Friends are great. I like having them, and talking to them, and hate losing them. I can really only think of 2 people I've ever really lost as friends. Actually 3 now. It's a sad thing to lose a friend. I don't like letting go, even when I need to or should have let them go ages ago. Girlfriends are nice too J

I need to get back on track. I'm lost in a lot of ways and there are things I need to be doing to do better at life. So I will start doing them. This very night. I want to go to the DogParkInn, so a friend of mine and I have made a deal to do things better and then we're going to go. I wanna go!!! I WILL go.

School is good. I'm actually enjoying learning math, something I never thought possible. I just like being able to understand it and see why it matters…(actually sometimes I really don't think it matters at all, but I'm sure it will one day) I mean, I actually ENJOY going to math Lecture...even though I've missed a couple times already, it's just relaxing. I do my math homework when I get bored…yeah, its bad. All my other classes are ok too. ASL is fun, but sometimes just long and tedious. My online class is…..Easy. Speech Anatomy is so interesting, but hard. It's almost discouraging….but I'll get through it.

I like adding Eth to the end of words. It's a new thing I Doeth. See, like that. And like my Blog title.

Life is good right now. Today I decided life is good. I really have absolutely no complaints. My job is secure (although I wonder how I'm still sane), School is going well actually…better than I thinketh sometimes…and I'm just not worried about the small things. Meaning…dating J

I misseth my Grandma Mabey. I just miss hearing how she is doing. I know she is watching over me and is with me when I need someone. She is Special Special.

I loveth Music. I want to write music and be amazing at it. I Love OPEN C. It's so epic and incredible!!

I love my Savior. Even in the times when I am down and hurting, which has been for quite some time it seems, he is always there to comfort me. I want to be more like him. I like the primary song "I'm trying to be like Jesus." I wish I could be a little kid again and sing that song and feel the spirit.

I love kids. I can't wait to have my own some day. Michelle and LJ recently had their first kid, in fact this past Saturday. I can't wait to see him. Lj was a good roommate, and is still a good friend. I misseth him, and Michelle being around too.

I love life. Life is good.

2 Timothy 2:3 Thou, therefore endure hardness, as a good soldier of Jesus Christ

I Spent way too much time on this Entry

2009-01-24T20:03:00.012-07:00

As i explained in my last entry, I came upon some of my Freshmen English class papers that i thought would be pretty awesome to put on here. The first of which, caused me all kinds of grief today. I wanted to just copy and paste the entire original file onto my blog, but this turned out to be much more of a chore than i expected, AND, it didn't really even work. Here is Why: Technology. The computer i had written ALL of these papers on, happens to be a ghetto old school desktop. Ok, not THAT ghetto...i mean it still runs, barely....i wonder if the hamster inside is dead? That could do with it running so slow...

So today, Saturday, I went through this huge ordeal to pull the computer out of my closet, actually the massive monitor and massive box containing the computer, JUST to find this document. I connect everything, even find the tiny speakers that came with it. (This computer actually happens to be the one my sister used when she first went off to college...so probably purchased back in 2000, or maybe 2001 at the very best..yeah, dinosaur.) I turn it on, and it's going so incredibly slow...i wait 10 minutes for it to finally finish loading. My roommate is a Computer person, so i ask him a couple questions. 1. Can i put more RAM in it to make it faster. I know we tried once before, but Best Buy told us it wouldn't work. He said i Can...but it's probably honestly not even worth it. Next, Wireless Internet: It just has a jack for a cable...and we only have one place in our house where the Internet actually connects to. He has a Wireless card thing, but after attempting to make it work. It does not. Right now, i am typing from said piece of ju....Computer....connected to the Internet through a cable running from my room to his. Great huh?

Since this computer is an antique, it has like Microsoft Word .97839 on it. It's pretty ghetto. So when i try to copy and past my paper thing over, the pictures don't copy. Of course i realized after, this had nothing to with the Hud i'm working on, just the fact i have to add the pictures in myself. So i searched for some pictures closely resembling the ones on my paper, and came as close as i could.

Lastly, The final picture on this entry has words written on it. I don't know how i did it for my report, but somehow i did. I couldn't save the picture from my original document, so i had to search a new one, use a photo editing thing from work (picknik...ever heard of it?) then re save it, and add it. So in all reality, the making of this Blog entry probably took...from start to finish, with many failed update attempts (it doesn't even have service pack 2 for Window XP on it....and then while trying to do the updates, to at least bring my windows up to speed, it told us/me my windows wasn't a registered product key....no idea how thats possible...unless my sister had someone install an illegal version...), and after some restarts, and downloading Firefox, new iTunes, etc. I got to finally writing the entry. SOOOOOOOOO You'd better enjoy this...actually, it wouldn't suprise me if no one makes it past all this mumbo jumbo about how i wasted my Saturday trying to setup a stupid Computer (Good thing this girl bailed on me....so i could end up having no life, AGAIN, on a Saturday night.)

The writing assignment we had, was to think of a "Grown Up Rule" that our parents always tried to enforce on us when we were young. I remember racking my brain trying to think of the best thing i could, and from any experiences i'd had in the past. Of course there were such rules as "don't swim until at least a half hour after eating" or "if you keep making that face, it'll freeze in that position." All Wives tales. I thought of one that actually happened to me, and my cousins on a trip to California

My entire Dad's side, meaning all of his siblings and all of their families, plus Grandma, Aunt Leora, etc. took a trip to California. We rented out a house that was basically sitting on the beach. There was a sand volleyball court in the "backyard" and the ocean was literally 100 yards away. It was pretty amazing...i think i took it for granted now that i look back on it. I remember staying up late and watching Comedy Central, mainly South Park was airing at this point in time. Sleeping on the hide-a-bed couch, waking up with a sore back from the center bar in the bed (why can't they make those more comfortable? I've never really quite understood this), going to Disneyland, going with Great Aunt Leora on the Jurrasic Park ride at Universal, and just having fun. I also remember listening to Third Eye Blind repeatedly throughout the entire trip. I still love that CD. One of the funniest experiences from this trip was going to Hard Rock Cafe. (which is where this entire post is coming from) There was the kids table, and there was the Adults table. If anyone hasn't ever been to a Hard Rock Cafe, it is exactly as it sounds. Hard Rock. It's pretty dang awesome. Actually, i really don't know how we even pulled off even going to the Hard Rock, now that i think about it, it's actually kind of shocking. During our meal, we noticed the volume of the music was turned down drastically. We asked the waiter what was up, and they said someone had asked for it to be turned down. We said "yeah right, this is Hard Rock, crank it" so they did. AND....it was turned down again probably 10 minutes later. This went back and forth throughout the whole time we were there. We later found out, it was our own adult table asking them to turn the music down. "The Decibals are too high for your ears" That was the reasoning.

Most of the rules Adults/Grown Ups use, are basically made up anyway, and even if they do have validity, aren't official Laws as some parents would make you think. Part of the assignment was to disprove the said "rule" and come up with some way to figure it out. Anyway, it'll probably just make more sense by reading it. Again, the pictures aren't as cool as the ones i had in the original, and due to the Blogging format, not really in the same spots either. But it'll do. Enjoy!

Grown up rule #136: Don’t listen to music to loudly!

Location: Warner Bros. Records Inc. Burbank, California

Date & time: January 2, 1998 11:56 p.m.

Log:
Break into studios in back of
Equipment truck, disguised as a large speaker.
Break into large file cabinet during rehearsal.
Find grown-up rule #136!! Escape in garbage truck,
Claiming to be broken speaker.

Grown up rule #136: Don’t listen to music to loudly!

Official grown up reason: You’ll blow your ear drums out!

Real reason grown ups are hiding: The louder you listen to your music, the more nearly invisible notes float into the public air, causing mass love for rock and roll music, which means more rock bands formed!

And who wouldn’t want that, why parents of course! We all know that as a young person growing up in a world so full of turmoil, we all need something to turn to get our minds off of all the bad. For centuries classical music was used as a way to calm the mind, and to help a person think well. As good as this works, for some people it just wasn’t enough. Early artists such as Beethoven, actually tried something different similar to rock, but the people disapproved. The electric guitar was invented, and caused a mass forming of rock groups. People flocked to these concerts, where it appeared this calming need was finally found, as well as more rock bands forming thus after.

Over the past 50 or so years, many many great rock groups have been formed, much to the parent’s disapproval. A group of parents hired a scientist named George F. Rockahater to find the reason for so many rock groups being formed. Rockahater found that in a high powered electric guitar song, many nearly invisible “Rock Notes” were sent into the listeners ears,

This giving them the ability, if so chosen, to form a rock band. As we all know, to ban rock bands is a crime against music, and must be stopped! Don’t ever let an adult tell you to “TURN IT DOWN!” Better yet,

Childhood Story #1 Jaguar Sunny D

2009-01-21T20:54:00.006-07:00

I was looking for a binder the other day, and happened upon a bunch of papers and miscellaneous assignments from my Freshmen English class, and found a Paper entitled "The Hedge Hideout" Finding this, made me realize i should share more stories from my childhood on here so those that never knew me as a youngin will know....can experience who I was when I was in my youth. For those of you that are included in the stories, I'm sure you will appreciate the Nostalgia (I find that's one of my favorite words. It's quite amazing).

I had a best friend growing up, Jake, well technically only from 3rd grade until now. He is married now, but we still talk and remember everything we went through. Sappy I know. During those Elementary School years, he basically lived at my house. He probably ate dinner more at my house during those years, than he did at his own. Because of how often he was at my house, he pretty much knew everything that was going on, even down to people that called our house regularly.

All growing up, I can only remember my Dad having a Sports car of SOME kind. First it was Jaguars, then a Mercedes, then Porsche's, then Mercedes again. Of course he didn't have them all the time, or all at the same time, but usually he had a car of his own. (He owned a business and the business paid for the car) I remember more than anything listening to Garth Brooks and Tina Turner in the Convertible Jag, cruising to get a slurpee at the Sev on 7th East. Wow never realized the connection there. Anyway, along with Sports cars, along with any car for that matter, comes maintenance and we discovered Jaguars didn't have the best reputation for not having Problems....That was crappy Grammar, but i don't care.

During one particular Jaguar time period, the car was in the shop for a ridiculous amount of time (Hmmm...sounds familiar with me and my car...) All we knew was that about 4-5 times a day, we could expect a call from the people at Jaguar either updating us on the "Status" of the car, Telling us it wasn't done yet, or when it would be done. The main problem with this was in that Jaguar only had our home phone #, and in a day when Cell Phones really didn't exist, so we were stuck taking their calls. We got so incredibly sick of answering the phone and hearing it was the same people from Jaguar, and telling them that "No, my Dad hasn't gotten home in the last half hour, and i will tell him you called 19,000 times today, Thanks" We started making up what we could say to them when they called us back to annoy them as much as they were annoying us.

You know those Sunny D commercials where the guy comes in from playing a hard game of Basketball, and is dead thirsty and looks in the fridge and finds "the soda, the purple stuff, the milk, YES SUNNY D!" This would have been the perfect premise and setup for a Sunny D Commercial. We LOVED Sunny D back in the day. Yes, it would have been perfect.

When you are with a group of friends and you just start laughing at everything, sometimes it's uncontrollable what happens to your body. My good friend was over, as usual, and we were laughing and making fun of the a fore mentioned Jaguar Service people, and of course Drinking Sunny D. What else would we be drinking? I honestly don't remember what was said, or who said it, but all i remember was as he was taking a drink of the yellow nectar, from one second to the next, there was sunny D ALL over everyone. But that's not even the worst. I look up, and see it continuing to spew from his nose. Of course all the rest of us lost it and jumped up out of the way to avoid the Sunny D shower. I can only imagine the burning his nose went through that day. Oddly enough, ever since that experience, Sunny D just hasn't had the appeal it used to.

I have a lot of Stories with Jake, and I'm sure if i asked him for more, he could give me more than my fair share. I'm planning on posting some of the assignments I found the other day, they're actually pretty awesome. I like writing.

The Job

2009-01-08T12:45:00.003-07:00

Did i really expect to get the job this time? Well i thought i had a pretty good chance, but i wasn't getting my hopes up. Although, i still thought i had a pretty good chance. Nope. Didn't get it. I swear my manager hates me and tells anyone that wants to hire me NOT to do it, wouldn't surprise me at all. This is the standard email i got from HR (that i've seen countless times now):

Dear Jeff,

Thank you for interviewing for the Information Coordinator position here at Nu Skin. We appreciated the chance to get to know you better throughout the interview process.

We were fortunate to consider many talented applicants for this position. Although your skills and experience are impressive, we have elected to appoint another candidate whose qualifications more closely matched the requirements for this position.

We are truly pleased that you have considered furthering your career with us here at Nu Skin and wish you the best. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help you along your journey, I am happy to help.

I know they have to send the same standard email to everyone, but for just once i'd like to get a personalized email from the person hiring me, telling me why i wasn't hired. I hate having to ask for it and then get a letter saying i'm crap (which is what happened last time). And what does "IMPRESSIVE" skills and experience mean? Seriously...if i'm impressive, HIRE ME!! I've been threatening to quit for ages now, and i'm pretty sure this is the last straw. You can only take phone calls for so long, and 3 years is just about enough for me. I'd love to stay with Nuskin, but it seems to be impossible without staying in my current position.

So if anyone knows of any good jobs, that isn't taking phone calls, and pays around 10-11 an hour, that'd be great.

Need I have a reason?

2009-01-06T21:09:00.008-07:00

Need I have a reason to be watching my favorite movie of all time two days into the semester. NO! I don't have homework yet, and I'm waiting to get a code i bought off eBay for my Math class, so i can't even pretend to start yet. Plus Blackboard isn't working for my other classes. Nothing i can do. The Goonies will suffice. (I will be inserting Lines from the movie as i write this, as i hear them)

So i go to BYU. BYU did not have a stellar football season. They were over rated, and really came out too confident in themselves in going undefeated. Sure they went undefeated last year, but that's beside the point. I'm glad they had a "crappy" season, maybe it'll help them realize you can't promise perfection. Now, Need I have a reason to agree with Steve? (please click on Steve and go read and then come back here) I don't think i should. Utah did awesome. They deserve to be #1. I am a BYU fan, always have been, always will be, was raised one (and did not betray them like other people I know), and i'm just calling it like it is. Although Utah won't get deemed champions, maybe it'll prove something needs to change in the BCS...as if that were a mystery anyway.

(I know you're down here One-Eyed-Willey, I KNOW you're here!)

I mentioned in my last post I had applied for a job. This job is a different position within Nuskin. I'm pretty sure my life career is not going to be at Nuskin, in fact I know that is the truth. However, while i'm in school they provide pretty well paying part time job. Answering phone calls all day isn't the most glorious of positions, but it is doable. Especially when you have co-workers to laugh with about the idiotic people that call in.

Example from today:
Me: Thank you for calling Nuskin, my name is Jeff, how can i help you? (All in one breath)
Customer: I've been taking the Cartilage formula (self explanatory) and after just one week i've gained 10 pounds.
Me: I'm pretty sure our vitamins will not make you gain weight. (Thinking in my mind....did you realize it was Christmas and i'm sure you pigged out...?)
Customer: I can't take any vitamins, they all make me gain weight.
Me: Oh ok. Let me setup that refund for you *meanwhile talking to Product Support on Instant Messenger and finding out its not possible, but whatever*

That's what I deal with all day. I interviewed today for the new position. I don't think the new one is anymore glorious or great, but at least it's off the phones. Basically i would be the "assistant" to the girl that does all the daily updates, gathering information, making sure everyone has the things they need for the day. Hence the title "Info Coordinator." I felt good about the interview, as good as one can feel i suppose. Although last time i had an interview for a different job internally, i was told after i didn't get the job that i was arrogant and prideful. Whatever. No one is perfect, but i don't know how that guy read into me that way. Oh well.

School. School started this past Monday, yesterday i guess it was. I hope this semester is enlightening for me. It really needs to be. I am starting my major, Communications Disorders (where i will later go into Audiology or Speech Pathology). I'm discovering something i really didn't know before...apparently this major is a pretty heavy female major. In my Speech Anatomy class, there are 48 girls and if you include the instructor, 6 Guys in the class. I didn't really know this, but honestly i dont' really care. I feel good about this major and It feels like it fits me and just feels....right.....so i'm sticking with it. I want to get into it and figure out at least if it's what i really want to do. I'm hoping though there will be a different direction i can go in rather than being just a speech therapist. In pretty much any major, that option is normally viable, and i'm guessing it'll be the same with this.

My Classes This Semester:

COMD 320 - Speech Anatomy - Supposedly this class is pretty hard. I heard some people talking about it in my ASL class, but they are in it now as well, so you can only really go off of what they have heard. The teacher seems like a pretty cool guy, and he was honest about the difficulty of the class. I loved Anatomy, and with that i think the learning will come easy/better to me than say...Chemistry.

COMD 133 - Introduction to Speech-Language pathology and Audiology- Online course. Hear it's cake.

ASL 101 - Class today wasn't held with my teacher. My teacher is being hired...not sure what that says about the program. The guy that taught us today is deaf and the head of the department. I took a semester in High school, and i think that will help some. It was kinda fun already being back in that environment. Kinda looking forward to it.

Math 110 - With my past un-excitement of Chemistry (AKA Math plus chemicals), I'm not sure how i feel about Math 110. I went to an orientation today and they basically said if you hadn't had math for more than 4 years...or in my case since High school....which i have not....then the class will more difficult than it normally would be. They suggest opting out of the class and taking Math 97. I really don't want to delay getting classes done anymore....I have a friend taking it, Eric is a math genius, So is Caitlin, So i think i should be fine.....Pray for me.

Christmas and New Years were good i suppose. I ended up having to work all the way up til Christmas Eve, but then had the 25th-28th off, which was a nice little break. After that, i worked graveyards the 29-31, which didn't suck terribly bad. I got paid extra, and just watched the Office. Got through the first 3 seasons...yep didn't get one call from Spain the whole time...actually i take that back. I did get one, but she wanted to place an order in Italy...so i told her to call back later, where i got her again and proceeded to transfer her to the Europe lines....Back to the Holidays. I spent the majority of the time with my family, whether it was my immediate or cousins or uncles, aunts, grandma, etc. All my friends were basically gone or busy with their own families. It was just a nice time to relax. New years was kinda lame....i kinda felt like being alone, so i was (plus i was catching up on sleep because of the graveyards.) Then Caitlin and Eric convinced me to come hang out, so i did and it ended up being fun. Not the most exciting holidays of my life though.

"Oh wow!! GUYS LOOK!! It's a BEAUTIFUL WATERFALL!!!" (One of the corniest and best lines of the movie)

I really don't have much else to write on right now....that's the basic update. I know i should write more often, but who wants to read nothing? I guess this isn't nothing....

"GOONIES NEVER SAY DIE!!!"

Reflections

2008-12-17T08:16:00.003-07:00

I think I may have mentioned this before, but this year has changed me a lot. I am a very different person than i was this time last year. I will probably write about all this in more detail later on, but for now this will suffice.

1. I have a career goal. For the first time since before i started college and was just excited to get back into school, i actually feel excited to start the upcoming semester. I no longer feel it is going to be a waste of time as i have for the past year or so. It's a good feeling having at least some kind of direction.

2. 22 1/2 years i hadn't ever kissed a girl, and in one year I have kissed 3. I wouldn't say I've been a player because each of the 3 girls i've kissed, have been special and meaningful. Along these same lines, having been in relationships i have learned a lot about myself. Mainly self confidence and appreciation for good quality people.

3. My Grandmother passed away on June 9th of this year. I know that people die everyday, but it was really the first time anyone actually close to me, that I've known my whole life, has passed on. I guess the main reason this has changed me is just because it's really made me realize how precious life is, and that I should spend my time better. I probably don't even listen to my own words and advice as much as i should, but that's the truth. I wish i could have spent more time with her before she left us, but I know she is happier where she is and she is watching over me.

4. Weddings. I have had so many friends get married this past year, including two of my best friends. This hasn't made me WANT to get married, but it's something I know needs to be thought about and is in my upcoming future. I really cannot even imagine being married soon or even engaged for that matter, but if it were to come along I'm pretty sure I would welcome it.

5. Spiritual wellness. I am not where i want to be, and I know I need to improve. I love my current calling in my ward, and the opportunity i have to work side by side with my Bishop. I've kind of slacked off a little bit, but i think it has a lot to do with the end of this semester. I love my Bishop though, he's amazing and such an understanding man. Sometimes i really wonder what it would be like not being a member of the church. As hard as it is to live up to some of the standards, I know it's the best thing I can do for myself.

6. Music. My appreciation has grown. I am actually writing my own songs, playing in different tunings, learning the piano (and loving it), and just appreciating it more than i ever did before.

7-10: An overall appreciation for life. I've tried to be happier, tried to be more positive, learned more about myself in this year than I ever thought possible. It's kinda crazy just to think of how much I've been through in my life, and then this year happens. It's kinda awesome honestly. I remember a lesson Rhett Gagon gave in my sisters ward about trying to live life more like Christ, to try and think daily how to be more like him in any small way. I think that if everyone tried to do that, the world would be a better place. No, I KNOW it would be a better place. Even if you don't believe in Jesus Christ as our Savior, still just following his example and the way he lived his life when he was here, would resolve so many conflicts. Plus during this time of year, people are generally nicer and more giving. If we could just keep that attitude the rest of the year.

I applied for a new job. I should find out soon if i got it....I'd be quite excited if I do.

For Anyone Curious....

2008-12-10T18:12:00.004-07:00

My Piano recital was today.

1. The Piece I played, entitled "Sleep Baby, Sleep", I played actually really well. I surprised even myself.
2. The Duet was awesome. We played "Up on the House Tops" The first page we played basically flawless, but the second line of the second page....yeah we totally butchered it. Amber, my partner, started to kind of chuckle...which made me start laughing, and then she completely busted out. I was so lost, so i just picked up on a spot i knew we both could play...and we finished...except we are supposed to finish on the same note, but i finished a count ahead of her. It was pretty awesome. Lucky for us, our teacher is way rad and she told the class afterward that she gave everyone full credit. Woo hoo!!

I love the piano. Anyone wanna give me some pointers? That'd be awesome!

So you're telling me there's a chance.....

2008-12-09T16:18:00.003-07:00

Do i really have time to be doing this right now? NO. Not really. But i'm doing it anyway cuz...well i need to.....

A. It's been way too long
B. I'm super stressed and I think this might take some of it away from me right now.
C. I've gone through a lot of things lately....that could use some sharing.

For the first real time in my life, I had my heart broken. It didn't make sense at all, but I am making more of it now. I've learned a lot about myself and who I am and what i want from a relationship. I hope to remain friends with her forever, because that's the kind of friendship we had. I know it wasn't easy for her either. Sometimes I still kind of question things, but it's all for something right? Besides that, I am dating someone again and it's going well, and I'm pretty happy about it to be completely honest. I fought it for a long time, and I think I felt like it wasn't going to happen because the time had passed. But, of course it's not always my plan or my way...in fact I'm thankful for that. If it were always up to me, I don't know where I would be.

School....OK. I don't know if I have even posted about me actually being excited about school....ever. Well I finally am. I have been taking a Life Planning and Decision making class, and through that and through one of those Strong Interest Inventory tests...you know the ones that ask you a bazillion questions about "Do you like This: (thing) or This: (other thing) Better?" Anyway, after taking that test, it came down and gave me some possible careers to look into. One such, Speech Pathology...which i had thought of before...was one of them. So i looked into it, and went and changed my major and i have my next 4 semesters setup. If everything goes according to plan i should be done in 4 1/2 semesters....I'll take a spring term or something....The only crappy part is the fact that I have to get my masters, so it'll be awhile still. But having an end in sight, and knowing what I'm actually going into makes life a TEENSY bit stressful.

I love music. I know this is nothing new, and I write about it all time. I discovered Aiden. They are kind of rocky/poppy/sorta unique band. I'm listening to them now. They almost remind me somewhat of AFI. ANYWAY, that's not my musical point in this post. I have been taking a Piano class this whole semester. It's been really awesome. You know how when you were a kid, and your parents forced you to take piano lessons? And you absolutely HATED it? Well, I had lessons when i was a young lad about 12 or 13 or so...maybe younger....and I was taking them from my Aunt. Well this particular Aunt had to move to Vegas, so once she moved I really couldn't take from her any longer....although i guess i could have, but those would have been expensive lessons. My other Aunt, actually probably my favorite on my Dad's side...there's only one...hahaha....started teaching us (Us being my sister, Dad, and myself) Now, why she stopped teaching us....I don't think I'll ever know. I just remember wanting to still play, (at least i think i did...i don't remember ever complaining about it) and then we stopped. So I have some very basic formal training, but really not enough to read music and what not. This class has helped me a lot. I am to the point now, where if I sit down and work on a song, I could most likely learn it in an hour or so. Ok maybe not that short of time, but I can do it now where as before I could barely read just the right hand. I love messing around and just having fun, and considering one of the string broke on my guitar recently and I'm too lazy to go buy new ones, I'm forced to play the piano instead.

Well I don't know how much stress this relieved, It kind of took my mind off some things, which is good I guess. I just need to get past the next week and a half, and I'll be good...until next semester starts at least.

Bye!

no. nuh uh. nada.

2008-11-10T23:36:00.000-07:00

Life=Not fun. At least not right now.

Obama: New President: Good or bad?

2008-11-05T00:41:00.007-07:00

OBAMA WON.....That's cool. That's all I have to say about that.

A lot of people have gotten mad at me for this, however, this is my case:

I did not vote.

Explanation:

A. I never registered. I COULD have, yes i know, AND i had a chance to when i renewed my license But, I did that too late. I guess that's what you get for procrastinating. That's what I do Best.

B. I didn't know hardly anything about anything. I just knew the names, the parties, and nothing than that. So sue me for not being political. The way i see it, voting is actually a pretty big deal. So when something is a big deal, I usually like to know really well the decision i am making. In this case, voting, i would want to know as much as i can from both sides (preferably unbiased....and living in Utah, that's pretty tough to get) before i make a decision on who I'm going to be voting for.

C. Would my vote REALLY have mattered? Utah would have gone Republican, which it did, so even if I had voted, and honestly probably would have gone with Obama, then it wouldn't have made that much difference.

I realize these reasons probably aren't the best. I also realize it's my duty as an American Citizen to vote, however I also have a freedom to NOT vote, and to NOT express my opinion. I chose to exercise the latter. In the future, i may try tuning in more thoroughly in the politics, but that's not for another 4 years. A lot of people think "oh no, the end of the world is coming!!" But really, I personally think and feel Obama won't lead the country astray. It will be an interesting 4 years.

A Sunday Evening Post

2008-11-02T18:34:00.002-07:00

Basically I'm bored. That's what it comes down to. Ok, it's also a new Month and i see the last post i made was exactly a month ago today. So i guess a substantial amount of things have happened since then, so i believe an update is due.

Update: Nothing new has happened. There done....now what...

It's been over a month since things with Camille ended. We still talk every now and then, i still miss her when the small things come up, but I'm learning to move on. I never knew break ups could be so hard. But i am grateful for the things i have learned from everything i've experienced over the past month. I've learned a lot about myself, and what i want (at least in the dating/relationship field), and where i need to be.

Living in a highly dense and saturated mormon city, it feels like the pressure to get married and be the perfect family is always surrounding me. But honestly, i don't let it affect me. I know I am in control of my life currently, and I have the means to do what i need to, and to progress (even though i feel like it's been a year since any progression has happened), and do better in departments where I am lacking. Ok this is making no sense. Basically what it comes down to, I am gaining an ability to blow off pressure and people telling me to do something I'm not ready to do. I want to figure my life out for me and for what i want, not what other people think is best for me. I have felt a strong sense of "depression" over the last few months, or maybe even the past year, but I think it's time to get out of that. I don't know how i'm going to get out of that, bu it's going to happen. I am feeling good about a new major, a new direction, and I just want to start fresh on something new.

I am going to abandon Spanish and PDBio altogether, and go with a new direction. In my student development class, we recently went over our Strong Interest Inventory tests. Alot of people speculate how accurate these tests are, however, I feel that if the person answered the questions without thinking about it or answering it how they "wanted" to answer, it's pretty accurate at telling you what you are interested in and where you'd do the best. My top "Theme" is Artistic. I LOVE the arts. Paintings, Art History, Music, Guitar, Anything that has to do with self expression, sincerely fascinate me. However, I know it's not something I would necessarily enjoy doing for a lifetime career. The test told me what I am most interested in, is working the medical field. This i already knew. It also told me I wouldn't necessarily do the best there either. It did however give me some fields i would probably do really well at. One such field I have considered before, and heard mentioned about how amazing it is, and have thought about looking into. Speech Pathology. I don't really know everything that it entails, but i know it's a pretty big field and a needed career as well. A classmate who is in that field, told me about what he knows so far from it. It sounds pretty interesting, and i plan on going to see a counselor tomorrow to talk about it and see the options. I'm pretty excited actually. I'm actualyl excited for something related to school, which makes me happy. It's a first.

As far as school goes now.....I'm not sure where i stand or what to do with my current situation. I have a Spanish test coming up on Wednesday. I haven't been to that class since the last time we had a test....which is very very very bad. I'm not sure what i'm going to do. I just found out last night that i missed a D&C test. I emailed my teacher begging for Mercy, but i'm not sure to what avail since i miss that class farely alot as well. All i know is this: Starting tomorrow November 3rd, 2008, I will miss no more classes if at all possible. I know i have to go to do well, and i want to do well. I really do. I just gotta do it.

A good friend told me once, "Action precedes Motivation." And boy is that true. I just have to figure out how to have motivation to take action to have motivation to do the thing i haven't been doing. It's like a circle or chain. One thing leads to another....

Last night i went and saw Maple Grove play. Mallory Davis is the keyboard player, and has been a good friend of mine for quite a while now. They are pretty awesome.

The Rays made it to the World Series, only to lose 4 games to 1. How dissapointing. How come the team i cheer for can't ever actualyl WIN the championship? Sucks bad. Even BYU isn't doing that well anymore. They BARELY beat CSU...they should have annihalted them. Hopeully the Jazz can do it this year, if anyone deserves it or needs it, they do. GO JAZZ!!

I am good. I think. I think i need to tell myself i am good, and i will be good. Thanks to everyone who keeps in touch with me and cares enough about me to worry about what i'm going through. I've just been going through a semi weird, kind of rough, hard, and confusing time in my life recently. I'm sorry if i've been bugged or annoyed or snippy. I'm just trying to figure my life out, and there are many people that are great and so supportive. I wouldn't make it without you. Thanks.

This Life i Live

2008-10-02T02:07:00.011-06:00

This Life. Wow...what a fun time huh? It is currently 2:11 am. I am awake, when my eyes tell me they are sleepy and want to rest, but my brain and soul cannot rest. How can things seem to be so perfect one moment, and then shatter to the ground in the blink of a tired eye. I can't understand everything, I don't expect to, especially when nothing makes any sense. All that i do know, is I honestly feel OK with things. I don't know what that means, but I guess it's not bad. I only know I've become closer to Camille than i have ever been with anyone else, and I really hope she can figure things out. I know we all cross paths with people in our lives for a certain reason. I am pretty sure I know the reason, or one of the reasons Camille and I have crossed paths, and i will take those lessons into my life and hopefully will be able to apply them, and be better because of her. I randomly wrote a poem about how i feel right now. Unusual, since i don't usually write poems. I guess new experiences bring new things to the board. Who knows, i may even make it into a song.

Aren't God's Creations awesome?

Isn't he the cutest thing you've ever seen?

Mishna.

This life.
This life i live.
This life we live.
Living and loving, that's what it's about.
How we do it, depends on us.
The choices, decisions, and paths we choose to follow.
The people we meet, friends we make.
Those we fall in love with, those who break our hearts,
Those who know us best
It is not all for nothing.
There is a purpose.
A purpose i do not fully know.
Knowing this is all i care about right now.
This life we live
This life I live
This life.

Re-Route please?

2008-09-24T07:58:00.004-06:00

Well here i am at work. Unusual? Probably not, considering i am here everyday. Today is the 24th of the month. I know it's September, but that's really beside the point. Today at work I will be flooded with calls from people asking "My order has a shipping date of the 24th, can I please stop or cancel the order?" OK, first of all the orders print off at like 5 am. Once the order is printed, there is really almost nothing we can do. It's not like I can walk over to the warehouse, and find their order, unbox it, tear up the order form, and process the refund. It IS possible, but 100% not feasible. There are literally thousands of orders printed off everyday, and on the 24th and 25th, even more. Even more, you have TWENTY THREE days to call and stop your order from shipping. It's really not that hard. If your order has already been sent out, i can't even call UPS to send it back to us for at least 2 days. THEN sometimes they won't even let me. It'd be better if everyone just got with the program, and watched your own back. That'd be nice. Now for the real reason I'm writing this entry today.

To know where i am coming from, it might be best for you to read a former entry, Changing Gears. When i decided to drop my classes that semester, long ago, i felt like that was the right thing to do at that time. I don't know why. It just felt like the right thing to do. As far as right now, I feel more committed to school, more committed to my life and what i want it to be. I'm still not 100% sure where my life will lead, or where I will be going with all this, but I feel like PDBio is still the right direction. I am retaking Chemistry 105 this semester, the class i had such a hard time and struggled with exactly a year ago. I'm already feeling like I understand it better, I'm getting a better grasp on it, and I'll be able to get through it better than a D-. If i get a C, that's fine with me. I'm aiming for a B. I know an A is pretty much impossible since the after grade in the class is a C, and that hasn't ever really changed. I know there are people in the class that do get A's, but heck there are people that get 4.0's graduating in Law. Yes, there are geniuses on this earth. Desafortunadamente, I'm not one of them, and I'm honestly ok with that. We are all given different gifts and talents, and being a genius is not one of mine. I'm smart enough, however, to get through Chemistry and through my current standing major. I love the idea of helping people improve their lives, and giving of myself and time. I probably won't end up going to medical school, or even be a doctor. But as someone very close to me right now has really made me realize, there ARE other options besides being a doctor. I want to succeed. I want to have a plan. I feel like after the last hour of the morning, i feel like i have a plan again.

I don't know where this is all coming from, but I have a pretty good idea. I've had so many, i guess you could call them "signs" that i CAN do Chemistry. We got a new roommate named Ryan, and what is his career plan? To study a language and go pre-med. He's in Chem 105 right now, and works in a doctor's office and is looking into maybe getting me a job there. Sunday at church, I was doing interviews with my Bishop, well being there while he did interviews, and met a girl named Jennifer. What does she do? Why she works in the Chemistry Department at BYU. She has office hours that no one comes in to, AND she has the EXACT same bday as me...10/04/1984. (yes my birthday is in a week and a half...i accept anything. Cash is nice too. You can make checks out to Jeff Mabey. Thanks) Anyway, i feel like I'm being directed right now, and being offered all the help i can get, and i need to take advantage of that. I just know all i need to do is figure out how to do well in school....and in life. That's what it's all about right? Summing it up, I'm re-routing gears. Back to the old. We'll see....

I'm currently taking a Student Development class entitled, Life Planning and Decision Making. I don't know why I didn't get into it before. We really haven't delved much into making big decisions, but the small things we've done and the things we have talked about, have made sense and made me think alot about my future and decisions i need to make. Even though BYU is a tough school, and sometimes i feel like I'm not cut out to be here, I really do like going to school at a great University. Oh and our Football team is doing awesome too. Never hurt anyone :)

New Month, New Post, New Me?

2008-09-01T03:11:00.007-06:00

What a Beautiful Creature

No. The new me is NOT a Giraffe. Although maybe I should look into getting one.....

There have been a few people on my back (good thing Giraffe's have long necks and backs....) about writing a new entry. Ok not really a lot of people, mainly just ONE person...and they know who they are...(Insert sound Giraffe makes here) Speaking of, does anyone know what sound a Giraffe makes? When teaching a child sounds that different animals make, how does a teacher instruct a child what this sound is? Do Giraffes make sounds? This is a mystery...one that must be resolved.

To discover this unknown and unsolved sound mystery, we will turn to the two best places i know online. Google and Wikipedia. Even though i'm sure most college professors, and high school teachers would discourage using Wikipedia as a source, i find it pretty much amazing and love it. I mean look at THIS. Just scroll down a bit, and click on Sounds and WahLah. For all you lazy people, i will quote here.

"Although generally quiet and not vocal, giraffes have been heard to make various sounds. Courting males will emit loud coughs. Females will call their young by whistling or bellowing. Calves will bleat, moo, or make mewing sounds. In addition, giraffes will grunt, snort, hiss, or make strange flute-like sounds. Recent research has shown evidence that the animal communicates at an infrasound level"

My first question on this statement of a Giraffe's noise emissions: Does anyone know where i can hear the "Strange flue-like sound?" I'd be quite interested in finding out. I think it's kind of cool, however, that to court a hot Giraffe babe, all the guy has to do is cough and hack. I'm glad humans don't use this technique, i just can't imagine it going to well for the guys.....

Guy: (See's attractive girl) "Hi, will you.... *Cough Cough*..."
Girl: (disgusted look on her face) "are you ok? Do you smoke? Do you have bronchitis? Are you contagious? Should I cover my mouth when I'm talking to you? What is it you wanted to ask me?"
Guy: *stops coughing, puts head down and walks away*

I imagine a Giraffe Courtship (more specifically a BYU courtship) goes something similar to this:

Jack Giraffe: "Hey so i was *hack hack, cough cough, wheeeze* wondering if you would like to *grunt, cough, hack hack* go to the homecoming *COUGH* dance with me?"
Bethany Giraffe: (thinking to herself) 'wow he's really got the moves with all that coughing going on' "Well ok...i was planning on going with Jerome Giraffe, but he didn't have a big COUGH at the end like you did there."
Jack Giraffe: *COUGH COUGH....(lung comes flying out and hits Bethany in the face)*
Bethany Giraffe: "Let's get married tomorrow?"

Giraffes seem to have it easy. I actually wish dating were that easy. I guess if dating wasn't hard, it wouldn't really be worth it in the end. I suppose. I can't complain though right with my current situation.

I have an older sister named Camille. I have known her for 23 years, 10 months, and 27 days (something close to that). I also have an Aunt Camille who i believe i have known since i was born. One of my best friends sisters name is Camille, although she goes by Cami. Mike married a Cami (also short for Camille). Chad is marrying a girl named Cami (also short for Camille). Counting (yeah i can count, sometimes), that makes 5 Camilles that I am associated with. Chad's Camille i don't really know. Even without her, it makes 4. Lets be honest, Camille is not the most popular name. There's nothing wrong with the name, it's a great name. According to the Social Security Website, the name Camille was ranked #369 in 1982 (the year my sister was born). It seems only, fewer people gave the name Camille to their daughter than say the name Ashley, Amy, Brooke, Jessica, Gertrude (ok that one probably isnt' true), etc. So I mean who would have guessed that I would date a Camille? I mean it's not like i planned on it, it just happens right?

In previous posts I have talked about girls I met online, have dated, wanted to date, etc. Those posts at that time were true and had much deep felt thought and time put into them, and since I put my truest feeling in them, I received much guff and crap from a lot of people. I guess a blog isn't the best place to put ALL your feelings, but I felt like they needed to be shared at that time. Let me just give a little expwanashon of the newest addition to the Camille's in my life.

Camille Bitton is her name. She is awesome. If there was one word to sum her up, that would be it. Awesome. She's from Idaho, the not-so-small-as-I-previously-had-thought town of Pocatello. Her Dad is not a potato farmer (believe it or not there are people that have other occupations in Idaho besides Potato farmers. Amazing i know). She has a simple and good family. Strong in the gospel, good morals, and good overall people. Camille and I met online. Go figure. I really didn't expect anything else to come from online dating after I ended things with Allison. Actually, I decided to cancel my membership to the dating site I was using, and met Camille before it actually expired. I guess good things happen for a reason right? Well we've been officially dating now for over a month. I can't believe how fast the time flies, it's really just incredible. Don't start asking me when we are getting married because A. We are in no rush at all to worry about that. B. We've known each other for like 2 months (I know at BYU that's almost too long right? Good thing she lives in Sugar House and graduated from Utah State and wasn't ever a BYU girl, so dating longer than 2 months flies right? =] ) As far as how things are going....things are going well. We're having fun dating, and for now that's what's important. Oh, and did i mention i'm just over a month older than her? Yeah. Pretty rad. Camille number six, added to the list. (almost a rhyme. Go me.)

As far as the rest of my life goes, I don't really know what to say. I'm still stuck at Nuskin. I love the company, I really do. I just wish I could move up. I try, and it doesn't happen. Perhaps it's just not meant to be. School....I'm registered...which is something i suppose. I still don't know what to do with my life. I'm still going to major in spanish, (Changing Gears), but other than that I just don't know. If anyone could figure it out for me, that would be FANTABULOUS. I really don't want anyone to tell me what to do. I can and WILL figure things out. I have to. I'm retaking Chem 105 again this semester (Again because I was in it a second time, but dropped all my classes...), and this time I plan on sticking to it. I really do WANT to understand it and be able to advance. I'm sure it's pretty sweet stuff once you fully understand it. I'm trying to get into a piano class as well. I have always had the strongest desire to play the piano, and since I know the basics, I'm pretty sure I could pick it up pretty quickly. School will be interesting.

Well I think this post can make up for the lost time and lost Jeffrey Scott Mabey many of you people have been searching for. Recently I've pondered about going by Jeffrey instead of Jeff. I don't know why, it just sounds more mature and I think I actually like it. I dunno. I guess that's another thing to figure out. I find the name of my blog Ironic. Half the time I write, I write about me trying to figure life out. Sometimes I think i'm really not that good at living life and being good at it. But hey, I'm trying my best. That's all that matters right? I suppose.

Mishna.

Some cosas...Ok just some random stufff!!

2008-08-03T19:54:00.005-06:00

It's Sunday night, and the moon is bright....well not yet actually, since it's not even 8:00 yet when I'm starting this. But who cares.

I have decided that there are some things that irk me, yes I-R-K, and I'd like to share them with the world. I could try and put these in some kind of order, and i might have to do that after i get them all down and commented on. We will see.

My List of Things that I-R-K the crap out me

Folding Laundry. Seriously. I can guarantee that there is not one person on this planet that actually enjoys folding their own clothes after getting them out of the dryer. How many teenagers have rooms that look like a shop vac full of clothes finally overloaded and exploded leaving clothes everywhere. If it wasn't so...unattractive...to have a neat and tidy room, I'm sure i would have jeans hanging from my light in my room, shirts gone missing, and socks being carried away by rats. OK my room doesn't have a rat infestation, that i know of...perhaps i should invest in some Mouse/Rat traps just to be sure. Actually, i kind of have always wanted a pet Rat. I hear they make great little friends....just not to kids. Good thing i don't have kids
Celery. Enough said.
Pickles. Whoever thought about taking a vegetable, Cucumber, and soaking it in raw evil...OK Vinegar isn't really evil, but I'm sure it's available in Hell....is one messed up person. People tell me "oh you have to try this kind of pickle. It's better than this other kind" OK...think about this. If i go out and eat a rock and it's gross, do you really think a different kind of Rock is going to taste better? Highly unlikely. A pickle is a pickle, and Pickles are disgusting. Even the word makes me wanna hurl. A world without pickles, would be a better world indeed.
People who ride your tail while driving, when the person in front of you is going slow and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it because everyone on either side is going the same speed. I hate it so bad. If you get on my tail, at all even if we are the only two cars on the road for 1000 miles, i will slow down to below 10 of the speed limit. You can pass me when you have the chance, and for all i care flip me off. I will just wave and smile as if i did nothing wrong. Because i didn't. However i am guilty for speeding myself. I do find it interesting though when I'm going 80 on the freeway, the speed limit is 65, and there are people flying past me. No wonder I've never had a speeding ticket. THAT'S what speeding is. Oh and back to my original thought....I CAN'T do anything. SO GET OFF MY BUMPER!!!
Thongs. OK....as a guy i feel i am entitled to this. The Thong, i suppose one could say is just underwear. Which is true. And as I'm sure MOST any guy would agree, CAN BE attractive. HOWEVER, there are certain circumstances and places it's just not right. For example: When you are at a church activity, and you are wearing a dress made of thin black material, and the sun is shining and shines right through it, thus illuminating for all the world to see. Some things just need to be kept private from the whole world. Sure for a husband, fiance, or perhaps even a boyfriend i suppose one could say wearing thongs is attractive. Along those same lines, we don't need to see it when you bend over. Usually it's pretty obvious...OK not all the time, but usually one can tell....we just don't need to see it to be sure. This is my matter of opinion, nothing more :) If you have the body to wear one, or don't and still choose to....well that's your decision. But as far as I'm concerned, we don't need to see it! I guess on the flip side, Granny Panties aren't any better either. Unless of course you're a granny. Then it's OK. And hot.
Ignorance. Mainly this comes from my being a member of the LDS Church. It really doesn't bother me as much as it's just annoying. Before assuming something, or saying something, make sure you go to the source first. I don't go into a McDonald's and ask "How much fat does a Nacho Cheese Chalupa have in it?" Then go on the corner of the street by a taco bell with a sign that says "Chalupas have 9,000 grams of fat. It will lead you to death and destruction." Go to the source, find out the truth and facts before you make any judgments. *note to reader. I actually do enjoy a Nacho Cheese Chalupa every once in a while.
Straws-I suppose one could argue this invention revolutionized drinking from a paper cup. However, i feel it is much more refreshing drinking directly from the glass. You can feel the ice on your lips, feel the liquid rush past your teeth, and overall it's a better experience. I suppose it DOES facilitate drinking if you only like a little bit at a time, or you have a mouth that only opens 2 cm, or you are handicap and need a straw. Those are about the only exceptions i can think of. I guess if you like straws, you can have mine. Down with straws!!
People who haven't seen the Goonies. Again, enough said. If you are reading this and haven't seen it. Call me right now and we will watch it. Thank you.
Blog entries that don't save the font like i want it to. I only say this because the stupid font keeps reverting back to the small font from my "Note to reader." I don't understand it, and would like some help on figuring out on how to make it work right. That'd be great. Thanks.

Well that's all I can think of right now. Currently I have a pile of clothes on my bed, thus inspiring this blog entry. I know it really isn't too exciting and i do apologize for that. Oh well. Get over it. Or just live your life and be better at it OK?

So what

2008-07-31T03:16:00.003-06:00

So basically it's been a long time since i've written. Life is going by pretty freaking fast and crazy. I can't really explain anything, or why it is as it is. Oh well.

Catch up:

Still don't know what i'm going to do with my life. I was at my parents house this past Sunday, and had everyone asking me what i'm going to do with my life. Heck if I know. And of course when everyone, oh yeah everyone consists of: Mom, Dad, Grandma, Aunt, Uncle, Sister....is asking what you're going to do, they give their advice too. Basically what it comes down to, is probably just me majoring in Spanish and doing something with my life that i don't know. So if anyone has any bright ideas at what i should do, let me know k?

Weddings. I've gone to one, and there will be 2 more done by this weekend. I have one today, Blake Ross, and one on Saturday, Ace Stryker. It's crazy. I still can't fathom Mike and Jake getting married. I guess its just that time of life right?

Stuff: I went on a river trip a week ago. River Rafting for a week, seriously amazing. It's the second year in a row i've done it. I am pretty sure it will become a yearly thing. My roommate Mike was telling me how it just helps him relax, and it's his power-charging trip for the year. I think it's going to have the same affect on me as well. It was so nice to just relax, and not worry about anything at all. Fabulousness.

Right now it is 3:24 am. I am at work right now, taking calls from Spain....basically (i use that word alot) i get paid $16.93 for doing nothing. Can't complain.

I don't really know what else to write about. Thats it for now...life is about the same as usual. Only i am kind of dating a girl right now. But i learned from past experiences that writing details isn't a good thing cuz people get the wrong idea and i never hear the end of it....so if you want to know details, you'll have to ask :)

That is all. Have fun not reading more :)

I'm Proud to be an American

2008-07-07T08:27:00.003-06:00

Today is July 7th. What does that mean? Well 2 things. 1) It's Monday and it sucks cuz i'm at work. 2) July 4th has come and past. I really meant to write a post ON the 4th, i just never got around to it. Anyway This is my post for the 4th.

Basically, to me, being a citizen of the United States is probably one of the best things ever. There is a feeling of patriotism and pride that is indescribable. I believe that citizens of other nations feel pride for their country also. During the Olympics the people wear their colors, and raise their flags with Pride. However i firmly believe that being part of the greatest nation on earth, knowing what our fore fathers have gone through, seeing how many people want to COME to the US, it really is obvious I live in the greatest nation on the earth.

I'm an emotional person. So sue me. Whenever i sing the national anthem in a group of people, or hear it on the 4th of July, and just ponder what it really means to be an American Citizen, it gets to me. I don't usually cry or sob or whatever, normally it just really touches me. In a manera unica....u unique way, that nothing else can do. I know many, many, many, many people hate George Bush, and hate the politics of the United States, but i am a firm believer that the leaders of America really do their best, as far as they know how, and as good as they can. No one is perfect, people make mistakes. I am also a firm believer that our founding fathers were guided and lead by God in forming the constitution, breaking away from England, and claiming our Independence from Great Britain. I really am so thankful for everything they went through to give me what i know now as the best Country in the world.

Having spent 2 years in Bolivia on a mission, my eyes were really opened to how lucky I am. People in the world hate the United States. They hate George Bush. They hate what America stands for. But why then, do people migrate to the US like crazy? Despite what they say, they know it is a truly blessed country. There are many opportunities in other countries to have a great life, and to prosper. It is possible. Bolivia has so much potential, the only problem is the people are so used to living poor, they don't believe it possible to come out of the poverty they are stuck in. I guess all you can do is just instruct and try to teach the people. You give a man a fish....and teach him how to live life and be good at it.

God Bless the U.S.A.

(Some of my Favorite American songs)

God Bless the U.S.A.
By Lee Greenwood
If tomorrow all the things were gone I’d worked for all my life,
And I had to start again with just my children and my wife.
I’d thank my lucky stars to be living here today,
‘Cause the flag still stands for freedom and they can’t take that away.

And I’m proud to be an American where at least I know I’m free.
And I won’t forget the men who died, who gave that right to me.
And I’d gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today.
‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land God bless the U.S.A.

From the lakes of Minnesota, to the hills of Tennessee,
across the plains of Texas, from sea to shining sea,

From Detroit down to Houston and New York to LA,
Well, there’s pride in every American heart,
and it’s time to stand and say:

I’m proud to be an American where at least I know I’m free.
And I won’t forget the men who died, who gave that right to me.
And I’d gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today.
‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land God bless the U.S.A.

AMERICA

Written by Neil Diamond

Far
We've been traveling far
Without a home
But not without a star

Free
Only want to be free
We huddle close
Hang on to a dream

On the boats and on the planes
They're coming to America
Never looking back again
They're coming to America

Home, don't it seem so far away
Oh, we're traveling light today
In the eye of the storm
In the eye of the storm

Home, to a new and a shiny place
Make our bed, and we'll say our grace
Freedom's light burning warm
Freedom's light burning warm

Everywhere around the world
They're coming to America
Every time that flag's unfurled
They're coming to America

Got a dream to take them there
They're coming to America
Got a dream they've come to share
They're coming to America

They're coming to America
They're coming to America
They're coming to America
They're coming to America
Today, today, today, today, today

My country 'tis of thee
Today
Sweet land of liberty
Today
Of thee I sing
Today
Of thee I sing
Today

And of course, the best of all:

The Star Spangled Banner

By Francis Scott Key

Oh, say, can you see, by the dawn's early light,
What so proudly we hail'd at the twilight's last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars, thro' the perilous fight,
O'er the ramparts we watch'd, were so gallantly streaming?
And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof thro' the night that our flag was still there.
O say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

On the shore dimly seen thro' the mists of the deep,
Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes,
What is that which the breeze, o'er the towering steep,
As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses?

Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam,
In full glory reflected, now shines on the stream:
'T is the star-spangled banner: O, long may it wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore
That the havoc of war and the battle's confusion
A home and a country should leave us no more?
Their blood has wash'd out their foul footsteps' pollution.
No refuge could save the hireling and slave
From the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave:
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

O, thus be it ever when freemen shall stand,
Between their lov'd homes and the war's desolation;
Blest with vict'ry and peace, may the heav'n-rescued land
Praise the Pow'r that hath made and preserv'd us as a nation!
Then conquer we must, when our cause. it is just,
And this be our motto: "In God is our trust"
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

I love America.

Nothing in Particular

2008-06-25T12:17:00.006-06:00

Right now, i have nothing in particular to talk about. I can't even think of something to just go off on. But all i know is i miss writing, and it's been awhile. I think i will compose a list of things I have always wanted to do, or do before i die. Also known as a bucket list. (The movie was ok...Morgan Freeman is one of my heroes, so it would make sense that i liked it. Other than him being in it, it wasn't that great.) I'm sure i will add to it more, maybe on a separate post, or this one. I dunno.

Bueno, Ya viene.

Jefe's Bucket List (in no particular order)

Travel the world-Basically i just want to take like 2 years and go everywhere. All through S. America (Knowing Spanish makes that easier, and more enjoyable). Asia, Europe-Italy, France, More of Spain, England, Ireland, etc. Finland, Greenland, Alaska
See every state in the U.S.
Go to Antarctica
Scuba dive a pirate ship wreck
Learn the harmonica
Learn the Piano
Read the WHOLE Bible (I know i should have done this by now, but i have not. So sue me!)
Learn how to cook....well....
Learn Dueling Banjos on the Banjo...and the guitar
Learn to PLAY the Banjo
Sleep an entire day
Buy a motorcycle
Eat Sushi
Start my own company
Name one of my future daughters Cielo
Grow a mustache
Be able to run a mile in 5 minutes
Be on TV
Record a song with me playing all the parts
Donate a million dollars to a Charity
Have a picture I've taken published in a newspaper or magazine
Catch a fly ball
Sit on the front row at the NBA Finals (only if the Jazz are in it)
Own a Porsche
Pet Rat
Have a dog named Gozath
Build a car from the bottom up
Graduate from School
Go Skydiving
Last for now, but definitely not least: Get married in the temple and have a family. (corny i know, but true)

Ok. So there is my list. It's in no particular order, and there are some things that are more important to me than others, but since there is no order, no one will ever know!! HAHAHA...k that was unnecessary. Hasta luego para ahora.

This is my Take

2008-06-15T22:22:00.005-06:00

Well People...it seems things didn't work out with Allison. I know some of my previous posts may have alluded to me saying she really was the chosen one, but let me give my philosophy on this. Is there really a soul mate for everyone? I don't believe so. Even an Apostle, i can't remember who, said that any two members of the church that uphold the standards and morals, could work well together and be a happy eternal couple/family. Now of course by no means am i saying that ANYONE would be perfect for me...since there are personalities that clash, and some things just can't be worked out. As far as Allison goes, here's my take.

I met Allison during a time in my life when i was really kind of starting to feel like nothing good would come to me. She came to me, and it was amazing. Every moment i spent with her, was just amazing and i didn't have any worries in the world. Of course most people would say "you're crazy for letting her go," but as happy as i was, i just didn't feel like it was going to be a permanent thing. I don't know why. I can't explain it. And to this day, i cannot for the life of me begin to understand why things have worked out the way they did. I heard a quote, or something, that talked about how people come into your lives during a "season" for different reasons. (no rhyme intended) Do i truly believe that it was meant to be for us to meet. Yes. Absolutely. I learned many many things from Allison. One of them: The feeling of truly being loved, and to feel a love for someone "unico" (only...solely...). I know that in the future, I will be able to tell the difference between a "crush" and love, whereas I wouldn't have been able to before. Another thing, and although this is more on the physical side, I finally got my first kiss. AND for the record, it WAS amazing, and i DO NOT regret kissing her one bit. I was fortunate enough to be one of the lucky few people in this world who didn't have a "Wasted first kiss." I truly felt it meant something. It did mean something. She is an amazing kisser, and i truly do envy the guy that ends up with her. One other thing i really really learned was more of many things...i just learned what i want in my future wife. I know the qualities i will look for, and the qualities i need to have in my life. I know what i deserve now. I deserve someone like Allison. Someone that will love me unconditionally for who i am and what i stand for. Someone that loves our Heavenly Father as much as i do.

So my question to myself, and to any of you out there reading this: Why not Allison? You didn't give it enough time! Well sometimes time is just not needed to know. We could date for 2 years and i could feel the same way the whole time, and it would have been 2 years when either one of us could have found our future spouse. Like i said, i cannot answer this question. From the first time i had this "Doubt" i have not understood it at all. It doesn't make sense. But i do know how i feel, and how i've felt, and what i need in my life currently. I do not want to lose her of course, but it seems it was the best option for me, for us, to move on with our lives. I've never really "abandoned" someone before that i have liked, or had a thing with, or dated. I've normally stayed friends with them...well until now. And i'm hoping to do the same with her. I think we may need some time apart and such to get over it, but i know we can be good friends, even though it is not something she is used to. :)

Will i find someone exactly like her? I hope not, since no two people are exactly alike. Will i find someone who will hate to say good bye to me at 3 am? Maybe not. Will i find someone who can and will love me like she does/has? I sure hope so. I am sad, but i am happy too because i know things will work out for the best for both of us. She is an amazing person, and deserves someone amazing and will get it in her life. People come into our lives for a season, for a time, for a reason. For what that is, only we can know. I know why she came into my life, and no one can take that away from me. I will always cherish and hold close the experiences i shared with her.

So now that this stage of my life is over, for now, i'm not sure what will happen. Of course i will go on dating other girls. But i think now, i might have more confidence where as i may not have had much before. Yet another reason. Thanks to all of you who have cared, and shown interest in my well being. I find that more people read, or at least hear about my blog, than i may have previously thought. THANKS! And again, i'm just trying to go about my life and be good at it. Doing the best i can. Doing the best i know how!

A Tribute to a Wonderful Grandmother: Mary Elizabeth Sorenson Mabey Matern

2008-06-13T23:49:00.003-06:00

Monday June 9, 2008 my Grandmother Mabey, as I've known her my whole life, passed away. It's bitter sweet though. For the past 15 or 16 years she has had to deal with health issues. She hasn't been able to eat food for 15 years, and has just fought through so much. 2 years ago she suffered a stroke, and her health just went downhill. All i know is she is better off now. I hope she got to eat something the minute she got to wherever it is she went.... i mean i know what the Church believes, and i know what i believe and know, but no one really knows how it is exactly you know? I really loved my Grandma. I did. It's weird how before someone dies, you don't realize how much you have loved them. I will truly miss her. I really don't have any pictures with her or anything, but i just pulled the one off of her obituary. She was an amazing woman. She knew how to follow the savior and taught us to do that as well. I will miss you Grandma.

After some consideration, i decided i need to write more about my Grandma. And since I'm at work, on a Saturday, and it's dead slow...thank goodness...I will do it now!

OK, so i think the best way to go about this would be to write about the things i remember most. The biggest thing i remember about my Grandma Mabey, was really how much i meant to her. I don't think i really understood how much she loved me, or any of us for that matter. She was always asking about us; "How's Jeffrey. How's Camille. How's Kevin. How's Kelly. How's Rebbecca. How's Renae...." etc. I know she always thought about us grand kids, and worried about us. The last time i saw here was on Mother's Day this year, which would have been May 11, 2008. I remember she came rolling in, in her wheelchair my uncle pushing her. I saw her, and actually was kind of excited. She got a smile on her face and said "how are you Jeffrey?" Come to think of it, she's really the only person that ever called me Jeffrey. My parents used to back in high school when i was a rebellious teenager, and they would yell at me by my full name...but those days are over :) I just remember giving her a hug and telling her how things were. I didn't talk to her much...now i wish i had. But i guess you live and learn right?

There were many times growing up, many experiences and funny situations my cousins and I found ourselves in with her. We all remember having sleep overs at Grandma's house, and one time specifically when we were up like at 2:00 am...not really a late late hour for me these days...but back then when you are a kid, and you were supposed to be asleep at like 10 or 11 because you were sleeping at Grandma's house, not usually a good thing. Anyway, so we were being rambunctious and we heard her bedroom door open, we were in the family room which was pretty far from her room thus giving us notice of her arrival. By the time she got there, we were all under our covers trying to hold back laughter. I'm sure she saw us, and probably knew we were faking it...but i don't remember if she said anything, or just left. I don't remember this experience exactly...but i do remember that it happened on more than one occasion.

Her favorite phrase was "when can i have an hour?" The funny thing, as my Dad mentioned at her funeral, was it was an hour...every time you talked to her. Another famous phrase was "special special." She thought we were all so special, and she really loved us a ton. Even though her life was kind of...crappy to say the least...and she was often not in a good mood, i know who she was underneath. She loved people. She was all about family. She was all about the important things. I was sad to see her go, but I know she is in a happier place with her sweetheart...whom I've never met, and cannot wait to meet one day. Supposedly she loved to dance and sing and i know she loved music. At her funeral, all the grand kids sang "I wonder when he comes again." It was pretty emotional for all of us, but we got through it and i know the spirit was strong.

I remember on my mission in Bolivia, i would get letters often from her. Many times containing a $5 bill which really isn't much...but in Bolivia it goes pretty far. I laughed a lot at the things she would write. See, letters took like 3 weeks to get to the mission. By the time i got the letter she had written, i already knew half of the things she wrote about just from my parents emails 2 weeks earlier. Or, things my family forgot to mention. For example: "It was so special going to Austins recital the other night. It's so neat he's taking voice lessons." (Oh and btw, all her letters were typewriter written...i don't think she ever touched a computer her entire life...) I was like..."what, Austin is taking voice lessons? That's cool...good thing my parents never tell me anything." It seems when one goes on a mission, the family forgets to include the small details of everyday life at home. That's life i guess. Anyway, my Grandma became famous in all my zones. All the missionaries would ask "como esta tu abuelita. Te mando dinero? Que me vas a comprar? jajaj broma" Basically, i didn't go a week without getting some kind of letter, whether it was from grandma, a friend, or my uncles Mission newsletter. I saved a ton of her letters. I don't know where they are currently, but i think i should find them and read through them. She always told me how much she loved me and how proud of me she was. She did make me feel special :)

Another childhood memory was McDonalds runs. Ok...not the runs you get from eating McDonalds, but going with Grandma to eat at McDonalds. She would take us to get happy meals. Sometimes, she would go to McDonalds, and just buy the toys...or buy a happy meal for herself, and save the toys for us. I remember there was a drawer in her kitchen that always had happy meal toys in it. I always rumaged...i wonder if anyone else did this? She always had a treat for us too. Whether it was Little Debbie Cupcake things, cream soda, Creamscicle bars, cookies, a Grilled Cheese sandwich, or whatever. There was always something.

My Grandpa Mabey passed away when my Dad was 16 or 17...something around that. So i've never known him...except maybe in heaven. Anyway, point being my Grandma remarried and was married to Walt Matern for 30 years. Amazing...really...it's just crazy though because they weren't married in the temple. Just for time. So now that she's gone, it's kind of like...goodbye Walt. Except, i don't think that will happen. He helped my Grandma so much, through so much ish and crap, without him...i don't know honestly how long she would have lasted. She got frustrated at times and threatened separation and what not, but in the end, i know she loved him. And he loved her. I remember about a year ago, when they both fell, and he broke both hips, he was hospitalized. Grandma was ok, but she was alone at home with Janet (Walt's daughter who decided to move in to take care of both of them). I remember we went and picked her up once, and took her to see him. She walked in, and walked to his side and sat down, held his hand and said "i've missed you. How are you. Are you ok? What can i do for you?" My Grandma, who herself was having major health and motor problems, wanted to help him. It was touching, and a side i really never saw between the two of them. I'm thankful for Walt. He helped her so much. I'm sure one day, my Grandpa Mabey will be able to hug him, and thank him for watching out for her and My Dad as well. (My Dad grew up partially with Walt in the home)

Well I think this does more justice to my Grandma. I can't think of anything else specific to say about her. Writing this has made me slightly emotional. I just know that she loved our family, she raved about the kids, the grand kids and all that we were to her. I know there were some familiy members who may have clashed with her at times, myself included. But we knew how much she loved us, and I know how much we loved her. We will miss her. We miss you already Grandma.

Dazed, Confused, Sad and in a Conundrum

2008-06-01T19:39:00.008-06:00

So i know i told you all to keep a look out on the Allison Kaye Parker situation. Here is the update.

Monday May 26th, 2008

Even though it was a holiday, and i could have had it off work, i still decided to work. Time and a half has a nice ring to it. Allison and I both were extremely nervous for this day, we didn't know what to really expect. But honestly, it turned out to be one of the best days/dates of my life.

After a lot of annoying people calling me, i got off work around 1:00 pm. Since this is our first date, and to kind of have neutral ground and for convenience purposes, we decided to meet in Sandy for lunch at Chili's. I got there first, since Ally decided to be lazy and sleep in and take forever making herself pretty for me, but i didn't mind. Her being a little late, gave me a chance to do something i had been planning on doing for a long time and was really excited about: Buying her flowers. A long time ago, she had told me her favorite two flowers were White Roses and Pink Lily's. I had never forgotten, and found it only appropriate to buy some for her. I stopped in Draper at a flower store, and went and picked some out and had them wrapped up and put together nicely. I was pretty much freaking out, it was the first time i'd ever done such a thing. I just hoped she would like them. So i got to Chili's and decided to leave them in the car for after lunch when we left to go do whatever. I got to Chili's around 2:15 and just waited for her to get there. She texted me at 2:30 saying she was there. She walked in, and i looked around the corner and our eyes met for the first time. Of course we had a big hug, and just huge smiles on both of our faces. We sat down and just started talking. It was a little weird at first, just seeing how we were so used to talking on the phone or through other methods, but i still felt like there was a connection. Lunch went well. We talked, and laughed, and actually saw how the other reacted to certain things. It was great.

We left Chili's and went out to my car. I had mentioned to her during lunch that i had gotten her something....i didn't want to mention this, it just kind of slipped out. So when we got to the car, i walked with her to the passenger side and opened the door and reached in and pulled out the flowers. She was pretty happy about it, and said she loved them. I just really wanted this date to be special, and so far it was going well. I knew she would love them and it made me happy that she was happy. We got in the car, and started driving to our first activity. Duck feeding.

I have NO IDEA how we got on the topic of feeding ducks one night, but we decided it would be fun to do as part of our first date. Since it was raining, we didn't really think we would have much luck finding ducks anywhere. We went up to her friend Sarah's' apartment to see if the usual ducks would be out. We pulled up and saw 4 ducks in the pond, enough we figured to get some bread and feed. We went to a gas station, strike 1: No bread....what gas station doesn't have bread? Seriously. Luckily there happened to be a Smith's across the street, AND a bargain stand with really cheap bread. I think we got like a whole loaf and some rolls for like less than $2. It was amazing. We pulled up to the pond, and after sitting in the car listening to Muse for a little bit, we went to go feed our little friends. Strike 2: Apparently some ducks just aren't that intelligent. The stupid ducks in the pond would NOT come over to where we were throwing the bread. I don't know if they weren't hungry, or scared of us, or the rain made them afraid. Whatever it was, they didn't want bread. Lame. But we saw some other ones on the grass waddling around, and went and fed them....they must have been the smart Duck family. They got full and kind of walked away, so we walked around trying to find other ones to feed...Strike 3: No more ducks. We were ok with it though, since it was kind of dreary outside and our feet were cold (we were both wearing flip flops and it was raining). We were originally going to go to Boondock's, but since it was bad weather, it wasn't really the best option. We decided on Nickelcade....yeah hadn't been there since i was like 12.

Who knew with $5 in nickels, you could have so much fun! Of course the games weren't amazing, and some of them wouldn't even work together, but i think we spent more than half of our money on Time Crisis. The other half was on Basketball, driving games, pin ball, and other stuff It was pretty sweet. At the end, we wasted the last of our nickels on a game to try and win some tickets. Since we only had like 20 tickets total, and didn't really care to get a bouncy ball, we gave them away to little kids. We were walking out, and i chose my kid. I said hi to him and he looked at me like as if i were going to hurt him, then i handed him a bunch of tickets. His face lit up, and his sisters eyes bulged. It was a great feeling giving away 20 tickets :) After Nickelcade, we didn't really have a lot planned. Our only plan was to go to Indian Jones later that night around 8:30. We decided to go up to my parents house so i could show my mom pictures and videos from Spain, and so Allison could meet them. I know some of you might say "Wow she met your family on the first date..." but that really just is how my family roles. They are casual and friendly, and it's normal for them to meet dates. So we spent some time there, going through my pictures to Spain (which i still need to finish on here...) and then we all went to dinner together at Spaghetti Mama's down at Jordan Commons. Allison had a riot laughing at my brother, and at my parents, and at our family. Basically my family is crazy, and if you can laugh with us...you will fit right in :)

Indiana Jones was ok. It wasn't amazing. I know there are some people who would say it was the worst movie ever made, but i still think it was pretty good. It WAS after all Indiana Jones. You couldn't expect it to vary to far from the original feeling of the older movies, even if it DID have aliens in it. So the whole time, well from after lunch up until the end of the night, we were both just extremely comfortable with each other. Holding hands, cuddling, and what not. We just clicked, everything felt so normal, so natural. It was great. After the movie, we decided to go back up to my house to just kind of hang out some more, and just be with each other. I told her we had a pac-man machine at our house, and she was totally stoked to play it. We played Pac-man for about a half hour and just had fun together. Then we decided to watch the Muse concert (did i mention we are both huge fans of Muse?) that i had told her about. I gave it to my brother for his bday, so we had it at my parents house. We turned it on and sat down on the couch and were just cuddled and watched Muse be amazing on stage. I asked her if she would rub my shoulders for me, because they were in oodles of pain for whatever reason. They always are. During this time, i was just engrossed in the feeling of her touching me and easing my pain. She then decided to massage my head...yeah it was amazing. After this she just put her arms around me and decided to hold on to me for what seemed like forever, but was probably only a few minutes. The time spent with her, just doesn't feel like time at all. It just goes by and i wouldn't even know or care how long it was. After this experience, i got up and sat on the couch again, but this time with her laying down and resting her head on my chest. She turned around and looked up at me and just stared me in the eyes. During this time i just wanted to make her happy and do what i could to make her comfortable. I ran my fingers on her head and through her hair and just was happy to be around her. Ok...so the next part was pretty dang awesome. I was doing the above mentioned, and she opened her eyes and kind of caught me looking at her...she says i was staring, but that sounds stalkerish.....but i was looking at her. She asked "what are you thinking" i said "nothing really" Then she made a pouty face. If any of you know Allison, the pouty face is pretty much one of the funnies and most adorable things in the world. Anyway i said "if you don't get that pouty face off, i'm going to have to kiss it off." Then she made it again, and i kissed her. It was pretty much amazing....and since it was my first kiss, and not rushed, and really awesome, it just made the moment that much better. I forgot to mention, that this whole time my brother had been in the room, but with his back turned to us playing his computer game. All i know is heard him say something, i looked up and saw him whip around to his computer screen....yeah we got caught on 3 levels. 1. My first kiss. 2. Our first kiss. 3. By my BROTHER. It was pretty hilarious. We were laughing for like 10 minutes after that and kissed again but stopped so we would gross him out. We finished the concert, and left. I took her back to her car around 2:15 am. We talked for a minute, and then we kissed again. All the kissing this night, were pretty much amazing. I hadn't ever had previous experience with kissing, but what i do know is that it was better than what you see in the movies. It was awesome.

The next couple days were interesting. The whole reality of the situation kind of scared me a little bit, and i kind of got cold feet. But, i got over it and was way excited to go out with her again. The original plan was to go with her mom and work down to Wendover. I guess her mom works with elderly people, and every once in awhile they take the "Fun Bus" down to Wendover to gamble and what not. Since i really didn't want to gamble, and she had the day off anyway, she decided just to stay and spend the day with me. I had gotten work off also to go with her, so i didn't have to worry about it either.

The night before, we were up until i believe it was close to 4 or 5....yeah this was a normal occurrence up until this point. We both woke up around 11 and i made my way up there and got there around 12:30 or so. Basically she attacked me :) JK, but she just gave me a big hug and we went into her house. I met her sister Ashley, and saw the flowers and a little bit of her house. Then we talked and kissed for a little bit. We were sitting on the couch totally making out, when we heard the front door open. Anyone that has ever been caught kissing or making out, knows what it does to you and your heart. Basically you freak out, your heart starts racing and you start sweating. So her brother walks in, totally taken back at the sight of us. It wasn't anything gross or bad, it was just him being startled....he said hi and just kept walking. Basically that ended everything. We were, again, laughing hysterically and decided it was time to leave. We went out to eat at a Thai restaurant, enjoyed each others company, and then headed up to Salt Lake. We went to the planetarium and goofed around. Here's the only picture of us together in existence :)

We went to an I-max movie called "Mummies: The secret of the Pharaohs" or something like that. Honestly, it wasn't that good, but we really didn't care since we were just worried about us being together. After the movie, we went out and walked around in some of the stores at Gateway. She bought me ice cream, and some chocolate covered cherries for self...which i only ever saw her eat like 2 of....odd. Then we went to the Lovesac store, and were basically hounded to buy one... "I'll knock $50 off right now for you!" No thanks...I'll buy something when I WANT it not when YOU WANT me to. Our plan was to meet my sister and the guy she was dating, as well as my buddy Jake and his fiance, all for dinner. We met them at Olive Garden and had a lot of fun. Everyone got along, and was laughing, and just having a good time. Then we decided to go back up to our house to play games and do whatever. Since it was a Thursday night, it wasn't like everyone could be out way late or whatever. Jake had to work early, so they left around 10 or so. But it was fun just hanging out and being with other people too. ( we played a game and somehow Niga Turtles came up...ask Allison...hahaha)

So in a nutshell, those were the two nights. We ended the Thursday date watching Snow White (Ally hadn't seen it), cuddling, and kissing. We left my house around 1:00, and i got back to Provo around 2:15 am. It was a great night, and a great time. I felt so good after our date, that everything was going perfect and nothing could go wrong. We just have so much fun together, we get along, we are so similar it's scary, and everything was awesome. I just didn't think anything could happen....of course with that lead, anyone could tell what i will talk about next is that something did go wrong....it did, but it didn't at the same time. Let me explain.

Basically, Allison is the first person I've ever actually come to love. I know it's hard for anyone to accept that since I've only known her for 3 weeks, but i know it is possible. We talked so many nights til 2 or 3 am, some even til 5 or 6. We just know so much about each other, so many small details, so many things that we have trusted each other immensely. I really feel like i have a best friend. One that i can confide anything in, and tell anything and not worry about what they will think. My cousin once told me, to just become best friend with someone and when they are your best friend, the rest will follow. Now i don't know if it just my fear of being serious, commitment, getting hurt, wanting to date other girls, anything. I don't know. All i know, is my feelings as of right now are this. I love Allison Parker. Whether it be just as a person, a friend, a soul mate, or whatever you want to call it. I just know i haven't ever felt the way i do about her with anyone else. However, there is a side of me i can't explain. A side that tells me i still need to date other people. I have a couple theories about why these feelings arose. 1. Since it is my first time NOT BEING hurt, i could have a psychological problem making me think it will eventually get to the point where i will be hurt, and i'd better break it off before anyone else hurts me. 2. I'm not ready for commitment. It doesn't mean i CAN'T commit, i'm just not ready for a serious relationship. It's odd though, when you get something you want...then you have it and you realize you didn't actually want it yet...yeah kind of crazy. or 3. There is someone i need to help first before i can be serious with someone else. I don't know. It might be far fetched to say the spirit is telling me to date other people, date Allison, and just see where things go. But it's so hard. I know how she feels about me, i know how i feel, and i have an immense inner turmoil eating me away. I just need to figure this out. It's so hard and confusing and doesn't make any sense at all. I want to be with her, and not hurt her. I know i have already hurt her, and i already hurt myself. So anyway, that is the update on the Allison Kaye Parker situation.

Today during Bishop Interviews (i'm the exec. sec. of my ward, thus i'm there with the bishop while he does interviews, giving me time to do whatever i want) I wrote down my feelings. It just came out in lines...like a poem or something, bu not really...here i'll just write it and you can decide.

HOW CAN I FEEL THIS WAY, AFTER SO MUCH YOU HAVE PUT ME THROUGH. YOU LOOK INTO MY EYES, YOU'VE SEEN THE PAIN DEEP WITHIN MY SOUL. YOU CAN'T LET GO, I CAN'T SEE WHY. EVERYTHING MATTERS, NOTHING MATTERS. LIFE WILL GO ON, THE WORLD WILL COME TO A STOP. A HALT. A PAUSE. THE EARTH SPINS UNCONTROLLABLY. LAUGHING OUT LOUD UNCONTROLLABLY ECHOING IN SPHERES OF CHAOS AND WONDER. HEARTS POUNDING. FINGERS TREMBLING. TEARS FALLING. SHAKY VOICES. ROSES BLOOMING. IN THIS WORLD OF CHAOS, WE ARE BUT A SMALL PART OF AN UNFATHOMABLE UNIVERSE. POUNDING, SWIRLING, EVER CHANGING. SILENCE IS BLISS TO HER EARS. BEING WRAPPED IN HIS ARMS, NO CARES OR WORRIES IN THE WORLD. THIS IS ALL SHE REALLY WANTED. TO BE LOVED BY ONE WITHOUT ANY WORRY, OR ANY FEAR OF BEING LOST IN A WORLD OF HURT. NEVER BEFORE WAS A STRONGER LOVE KNOWN IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD. YET THE WORLD CALLS. NO ONE KNOWS WHY, OR CAN UNDERSTAND THE REASON. NEITHER ONE OF THEM CAN COMPREHEND THE WHY, THE HOW, THE REASON. IS THERE A REASON? WHY CAN'T THIS BE EASY. WHY CAN'T IT ALL MAKE SENSE. AREN'T' WE HERE TO BE LOVED? WHAT DOES THE WORD LOVE MEAN. IS IT JUST, TO BELIEVE, LOVE IS ONLY A FEELING? LOVE IS AN ACTION. LOVE IS A SUBSTANCE YOU CAN BREATHE IN, EAT, DRINK, TOUCH. LOVE IS REAL. HURT IS REAL. PAIN IS REAL. WHY DO TWO OPPOSITE WORDS GO SO WELL TOGETHER. THEY WALK HAND IN HAND. IT SHOULD NOT BE THIS WAY. IT IS NOT FAIR. THE ANIMALS DO NOT GO THROUGH THIS. IS IT BETTER TO HAVE NO EMOTIONS? TO LIVE THE LIFE A DOG, A CAT, A FROG, A MOUSE. THE ONLY WORRY OF LIFE IS TO EAT AND SLEEP. TO FALL IN A SLUMBER OF DEEP DREAMS, NEVER WISHING, NEVER WONDERING OR FALTERING ABOUT ANYTHING. THE BLISS OF BEING IN LOVE . THE JOY OF FEELING LOVED. YET IT CAN NOT BE. THE REASON UNKNOWN, BUT ACCEPTED. TIME WILL PASS. THEY WILL MOVE ON. PERHAPS ONE DAY, THEY WILL KNOWS, AND COME TO TERMS OF PEACE, PERHAPS IN THE ARMS OF ANOTHER, PERHAPS IN THE ARMS OF EACH OTHER. ONLY TIME WILL TELL. LIVING LIFE TO THE FULLEST, THAT'S WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT. TO BE HAPPY, IS TO BE ALIVE. TO BE ALIVE IS TO BE A PART OF THIS WORLD AND GOD'S PLAN.

That's it. It's all scattered, and probably doesn't make sense. But it makes sense to me, and i promise on my life that it will all make perfect sense to Allison. I wrote it all in caps because that's how i wrote it on paper. It took up two sides of a page. The words were just coming to me, and spewing out of my pen. I felt like a writer...it was quite intriguing.

So anyway mi gente, that's my update. I'm sorry it wasn't the best blog ever. But i feel good about it. I know things will work out for the best. I know what will happen will happen, and if things are meant to be, well they will become what they will. I'm just trying to live life and be good at it the best i can and know how!