It was a fun ride......

I honestly don't know where that phrase came from, but, the last 5 1/2 years have been interesting. Alas, I have finished. I have raced the good race, and finished. I definitely didn't come in first, but I didn't come in last. I now have officially finished all required course work for my Bachelor's degree!!

I really don't know how to feel about this yet. It's kind of an indescribable feeling, and anyone that has experienced this knows what I'm feeling.

What's next? Well, theoretically I'm supposed to start looking at grad schools.....I'm just not sure how it will happen. Grad school is EXPENSIVE, and, my grades just aren't even anything anyone would take a second look at. Hopefully if I do well on the GRE, things will turn out for the best and I can get in somewhere.

For now, for the moment, I am HAPPY! I am proud of myself and this accomplishment! Things will fall into place, I know they will. They always do. But for now, YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Remember that time?

Remember that time I used to be good at blogging? Then the school year ended, and I stopped. Like I do every summer? I guess that wasn't really a time, it just happened again. This could be an epic problem come December....why? BECAUSE I'M GRADUATING!!!

Yes. Me. Unbelievable right? Well I know for sure I didn't do it getting straight A's, but I passed all my classes and that's all that matters. Well for this stage at least. Which brings me to my next problem. The real problem. Grad school.

I'm going to be honest. I will be graduating, from BYU, with a cumulative GPA of 2.6 I really don't understand why school has been so difficult for me, but alas, it has. I know from talking to others currently in grad school, for Speech Language Pathology, that most schools require a minimum of 3.0 to get in. I suppose I could have retaken some of the classes I didn't do the best in, but now that BYU has changed their retaking policies, I didn't feel it would be worth it. Especially if I didn't do much better, which is likely. Maybe I don't believe in myself enough, or maybe I didn't study good enough, but it is what it is. All I know is for now, graduating is going to be exciting and something i'm looking forward to.

On other fronts, I still live at home. Is it a bad/good thing? I'm not sure. I do feel like me being there has been beneficial for various reasons, not even particularly my own needs/satisfactions. I feel like I've grown closer to my parents and come to recognize a bit more of who they are what they mean to me. Sappy right? I started a new job this summer at Convergys. Yeah, another call center job, which I don't love, but honestly I'm not hate either. I'm working graveyards, Wednesday-Sunday 11:30 pm-8 am. That's not the best, but it's really slow and I have plenty of time to do what I want (within reason) and can do my homework as well. It's not a career, just something to get me through this semester until I can find something better.

Dating. Well, let's not go there. Cuz, it isn't going on. Sometimes I THINK it/something is going on, but yeah, it's just me and my mind pretending it is. Oh well. someday right? I would go into specifics, but I honestly just don't feel like talking about the lowness that is my dating life.

Well that's about it right now. I will try to write more. Even though my blogs are boring. I guess that's about how my life sums up at this point. But that's ok, life doesn't have to be exciting all the time.

One Year. Wow.

One year has passed since this all began. I guess technically you could say it began the end of March, but April 28th, 2010 was when I was wrongfully fired. I've commented and posted a few times this past year about things I've learned, but even still it was still quite a depressing ordeal I went through. However, I'm definitely in a better place in my life than I was a year ago, which makes me feel happy about how things went down.

Here's to another year of better-ness!!!!

Almost There

Finals has never done this to me:

The way I see it, you go through the semester, go to class, take tests, write papers, turn in assignments, and it is all SUPPOSED to culminate at the end with the final exam. I find the majority of teachers these days, whether from the goodness of their hearts, or laziness, I find it much easier to get through finals when the exams are equally weighted. Aside from that, being a Senior...well basically a super senior, finals don't stress me anymore. In fact, this semester all i can think of is this.......

Hopefully, as long as everything works out as it should, no, WILL, I will be at a beach similar to this in Florida before too long. Almost THERE!!!!

Unexpected Pleasantries And Pensativaries

You know, sometimes life comes at ya and there isn't a lot you can do about it. I got fired almost a year ago, and while that sucked........royally.........it was the best thing that could have happened to me at that time. It spurred change, much needed change, that I otherwise wouldn't have made on my own. I move home, Austin comes home from his mission early due to medical problems, and there I was to help out and support. I got a new job, but 6 months later I decided to quit mainly because I wasn't going to work Sunday's anymore. My school schedule has been pretty hectic this semester, but luckily I have good parents who were willing to support me (as far as food and rent go) by letting me live at home, free of charge. I get a temporary job, helps with some gas money and other small things, and holds me over. So through all the ups and downs, there are definitely blessings.

Jump to tax season, which is right now. I had been waiting for my 1099 for the Vespa I won a year ago, but the dang record label (where it should be coming from), hadn't sent it yet, and I was running out of money. Fast. I owed my Mom for 4 months of cell phone ($284), hadn't paid my Health insurance yet ($224), and well I didn't want to have a bank account on empty. So I said screw it, I made almost nothing last year, I've made multiple requests for them to send me the 1099, and it was time. It's a blessing not being claimed anymore, and being a student. All I know is, blessings come in many forms and sometimes it's something you never expected. With the more than triple amount of what I was expecting in return, I've been able to pay off everything I needed and still have an abundance left. Not having money the last two months really helped me learn how to NOT spend, and now that I have some money, I have no desire to go out and spend it. Life's lessons come in a variety of ways, but they're definitely all important.

Next, our poor Travis. Brent so lovingly named our what-used-to-be Chevy Traverse, Travis, the day we found out it was wrecked. Who totaled it? Yep! Austin. But guess what, I'm looking at it as a blessing. First, he switched insurance the day before, and had a clean record. (sucks for the insurance company, but i'm sure it's not the first time it's happened) He ran a red, hit a car, and totaled it. I wouldn't say totaling a car is a blessing, but some of the branches from that incident, I would consider such. First off, it takes away a car payment. The family isn't "struggling", but money is tight. Tight enough that well, who knows what may happen in the short future. One day at a time right? Second, my parents were expecting the insurance to write them a check for less than they owe, thinking at least 3-4k less. What happened? The exact opposite. So, no car payment (down a car, but we'll get to that), and $3500 in pocket. Luckily my Uncle has been kind enough to let my Dad drive around one of his extra cars, however, he's looking to sell it. I'm pretty sure my parents will purchase it, and we'll be back up to the same number of cars, with no extra payments. The Jetta is paid off, so that just leaves the HHR.

I suppose it depends on how you look at these things, but as for me, I'm taking them in stride as blessings.

As a second part to this post, I just wanted to comment on people. People come into your life and some make a lasting impression. An impression your mind just can't seem to let them go. I had a major crush on a particular girl, basically 2 years ago. For whatever reason, she is someone I will never forget. I don't know what it was about her........her hair, her laugh, her smile, or just her being her. I personally felt we developed a great friendship, but it never amounted to more than that. Honestly, to this day, that has been hard. There are certain connections made in life that are stronger than others, ours was strong. To me at least. Well, she's engaged. Am I sad about that? Well, yes and no. It hurts to think I never really had a chance, but I think what hurts the most (how ironic that I'm listening to Rascal Flatts right now.........that song too), is that our friendship is basically non existent at this time. Sure we're FB friends still, but I can almost guarantee I will be deleted when she gets married. It happens. It's normal. Apart from that, I am happy for her. True friendship is being happy for the other person when they are going through happy times. I am happy for her, and I know someday my Princess will come. Just not sure when that will be.......but one day. Right? :)

Speaking of, I have a new friendship developing. She lives out of state, so it is making things a bit more difficult. It also came about unexpectedly, but after the course of the last year and more, it seems that's when the best things happen. It's only been a couple weeks, but we seem to get along really well, and who knows. Anything could happen.

Oh yeah. BYU is in the sweet 16. Play today. It's JIMMER TIMMMMMMMMMMMMMME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yep, It's me

Over a month and no post. I know you are all disappointed. (all 3 of you that read this) I have no excuse for my absence, except maybe business with a big presentation and the standard school stuff. Life is pretty uneventful right now.

I got a temporary job. It consists of these:

Ok, my job actually has nothing to do with even caring about those. All I get to do is sand off rust on the magnet, spray paint it, rub the rust off the foam pad, put it back in it's mini box, and box it back up with the rest of the defective order. Yeah, this is what I'm doing. "Fixing" Miche bag magnets. $10/hour. Contract labor=no taxes. No complaints. And I can work the hours I NEED....which is my only possibility for a job right now. Yeah, pretty boring, but good music gets me through it.

My old roommate Mike is getting married Saturday. That's weird. I'll post pictures from that, since I am sure I will take some. I'm happy for the kid though. I know he's worked a long time to get to this point and its a step in his life he needs to take. Yay :)

My dating life? What about it? Oh yeah, it's non existent. But you know, right now that's ok. I have made some good friends recently and who knows, anything could happen right?

Today is lent, which means you give something up for 4o days, which I've never done......is it really necessary to give something up for 40 days, then just jump ship at the end and get back into your habits? No. That's dumb. So starting today, tonight, I will start doing 2 things, and do them for the 40 days and hopefully by achieving these 40 days, it will make a new habit.

Read my scriptures & Personal prayer. Both things I know I need in my life and will greatly benefit me.

Pretty lame post, I know. But hey, it's a post. Right?

Love Hate Relationship

There are a few things in this world with which I have a love-hate relationship. One of them is sweat pants.

I love coming home and around 9 or 10, changing into comfy pants to lounge around the house in. I recently bought some microfleece lounge pants from Kohls, and LOVE them. However, sleeping in them is just a pain. Getting in bed, and getting settled in is doable, but for me, half the night is spent waking up with my pants rolled up my leg. It drives me CRAZY!!! But since it's been so cold, it's so much better to sleep with pants and not shorts on, which is what I usually do.

Just thought I'd share that.

Complicated

Dating is complicated. That is all.

Finding Me

Life has been interesting of late: Sister got married, new year, brother still home, quit my job in a step of faith, almost done with school. Yeah, nothing really huge, but ultimately I've been really trying to find myself.

I'm 26. I was raised in a good family with parents and siblings who I know love and care about me. Typical Mormon raising, being taught right from wrong, to try and live the commandments and to respect my fellowmen. I went on a mission to Bolivia, of which I am eternally grateful, and have been home now for over 5 years. I graduated from Highschool almost 8 years ago, and well this is life.

As a Utah Mormon Boy, growing up meant certain mile stones. Up until I was 8, the milestone was getting baptized as a member of the Church my family belonged to, which happens to be the LDS church. Did I have a REAL, firm, testimony when I got baptized? Nope. Did I feel it was the right thing to do? Yes. Why? Because that's what I was taught. The next milestone, at least for me, was to get my Eagle Scout. Ages 11-14 was all about scouts; mutual as a deacon generally consisted of working on merit badges, or just doing something associated with scouts. Campouts, week long camps, and eventually, many merit badges later, Eagle at age 13 (or 14....) By this age, 14, I was in middle school and all that life consisted of was school. No job, no girlfriend (didn't really care too much yet...and I couldn't date either), which brings the next milestone: 16. Sixteen brought the "freedom", as it were, to drive and go about my own activities. I had my first job, started going on dates, and really this was a pretty life changing era of time. Motoring through high school, going to dances, hanging out with friends, going to concerts, life is becoming more social and more meaningful. I hit 18 in the beginning of my Senior year, so that wasn't really a huge milestone as it kinda happened during an already bigger part of life. The next milestone: Graduation. No problem. High school was, easy, right? I mean, you go to class, you do your assignments, you get good grades, and you finish. It just wasn't a big deal, at least to me. Next Milestone: Mission.

As a Mormon, growing up in Utah especially, and more specifically as a Mormon BOY, the mission is kind of the culminating milestone for your first 21 years of life. Everything you do in church is supposed to help you get ready for looming trial of a lifetime. And I say looming only in the sense of you knew it was coming, and it was going to be a big deal. Yeah, I had a testimony of the church, but it wasn't imprinted in my heart and soul as much as it is now. I will admit, I had never finished the Book of Mormon before the MTC, which is where I finished it for the first time and started gaining my own testimony.

Bolivia was a shocking experience, in so many ways and on so many levels. I really had no idea what to expect when I received my call to serve in the Bolivia, Santa Cruz mission. I knew where Bolivia was, that it was a Spanish speaking country, and that it would be a crazy experience. It was, completely. I sincerely grew to love the people I walked among for 2 years, and was truly sad to leave after that 2 year period was up. The mission really changes a lot of things about you, but it doesn't change who you ARE at the core, which is a very big misconception some people getting ready to go on a missions have. Some people think they'll go, become this spiritual giant, and come home and be praised for their goodness wherever they may go. Not true. In fact, I know of quite a few guys that returned home and have since lost their way. I will admit I have strayed a bit at times, but ultimately I know I am doing well right now and am on the right path, which brings me to the main point of this post. I'm 26, and STILL trying to find myself.

After so many milestones in life, you'd think a person would come to at least a semi-understanding of who they are and what they want from life. Yeah, I have a religion I believe in and know to be true; I'm in college, almost done with a Bachelors degree in a field I'm still not sure I really want to be in; I go on dates every once in a while, but ultimately I still feel lost in regards to who I am. The essence is of me establishing who I am, to myself and to those around me. I remember once instance being told that I "faked everyone out" on my mission from the letters I would write and such. Of course I never intended to fake anyone out of who I am, just it seems as you go through different phases of life, you are a different person.

I know I am a different person now than I was a year ago. I was living with my mission companion and some buddies in a House in Provo, but simply put, I just was not progressing. Then the best thing that could have happened to me, (of course I see this now) did: I got fired. Being fired forced me to move home and look for other opportunities. Since then I have been riding the bus to school everyday. Even riding the bus has given me a broader outlook on life. The world is full of so many different people, who each have their own issues going on and their own lives they are living. The other day there were two guys talking about having DUI's and not being able to drive. To them, that's the "norm". To me, that's insane. But what is the norm? Who decides what normal is for me? I really believe only one person can: Me.

Honestly, the next milestone in my life is to get married. Yeah I'm close to graduating, but if I want to use the bachelors I will have, Graduate school is a must. This means graduation doesn't mean a TON, at least not yet. My grades aren't stellar, which makes me believe it will be tough to actually get into a good school, if any at all. I don't doubt the choices I have made in my school career as I feel they are right for me, right now, but who knows.....maybe this year will bring something to light or something will change. I'm not obsessed with getting married, by any means, as I know it will happen eventually. However, my parents have been on me like white on rice to get married, well at least to date, but who can blame them? They had 2 kids by the time they were the age I am now, but times are different and so are people, of this I am sure. Of course I want to get married. I want the companionship, the love, and ultimately to achieve that milestone of my life. In a Mormon society, for a young man, it seems after the mission the only true milestone you have left is a "Regular" life: A career and a family. Hopefully along the way you can accomplish other goals you set for yourself, have adventures, and enjoy life. I suppose once you've reached that milestone, the next one is for retirement...but then what? I guess it just goes full circle.

I like where I am right now, I really do. I have a Mustache, which is something that is giving me an identity I never had before. And as dumb as it sounds, I feel like it's helping me be more confident in who I want to become. It's just something I changed, something small, that has made a difference in how I feel about myself. Yeah, Mustaches aren't the most popular facial hair, and unfortunately have been associated in our society with those of lesser moral values, but I feel like it's something that actually fits me. I even heard my Mom say she likes it. I'm not sure how long I'll keep it, but for now it's what I need to do, for me. Maybe this whole post is about selfishness, but in the end a person has to be somewhat selfish to figure out who they are. All I know is right now, I'm in it for the haul!

~~~~~Overheard at BYU~~~~

BYU is a place where people say things that you wouldn't normally hear in conversation, except at BYU. Below are some gems I have heard at BYU in just a day & a half of the new semester.

Girl: Yeah, I mean my GPA isn't that bad. Last semester I got my first C ever.....it was a C+ so at least it's not just a normal C.

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Girl: I really do try to be my best.

Boy: Well, I'm probably not just as spiritually in tune as you are.

Girl: *Laughs* Well, I wouldn't say that. I mean, you DID serve a mission.

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Yes, BYU, You are special.