Finding Me

Life has been interesting of late: Sister got married, new year, brother still home, quit my job in a step of faith, almost done with school. Yeah, nothing really huge, but ultimately I've been really trying to find myself.

I'm 26. I was raised in a good family with parents and siblings who I know love and care about me. Typical Mormon raising, being taught right from wrong, to try and live the commandments and to respect my fellowmen. I went on a mission to Bolivia, of which I am eternally grateful, and have been home now for over 5 years. I graduated from Highschool almost 8 years ago, and well this is life.

As a Utah Mormon Boy, growing up meant certain mile stones. Up until I was 8, the milestone was getting baptized as a member of the Church my family belonged to, which happens to be the LDS church. Did I have a REAL, firm, testimony when I got baptized? Nope. Did I feel it was the right thing to do? Yes. Why? Because that's what I was taught. The next milestone, at least for me, was to get my Eagle Scout. Ages 11-14 was all about scouts; mutual as a deacon generally consisted of working on merit badges, or just doing something associated with scouts. Campouts, week long camps, and eventually, many merit badges later, Eagle at age 13 (or 14....) By this age, 14, I was in middle school and all that life consisted of was school. No job, no girlfriend (didn't really care too much yet...and I couldn't date either), which brings the next milestone: 16. Sixteen brought the "freedom", as it were, to drive and go about my own activities. I had my first job, started going on dates, and really this was a pretty life changing era of time. Motoring through high school, going to dances, hanging out with friends, going to concerts, life is becoming more social and more meaningful. I hit 18 in the beginning of my Senior year, so that wasn't really a huge milestone as it kinda happened during an already bigger part of life. The next milestone: Graduation. No problem. High school was, easy, right? I mean, you go to class, you do your assignments, you get good grades, and you finish. It just wasn't a big deal, at least to me. Next Milestone: Mission.

As a Mormon, growing up in Utah especially, and more specifically as a Mormon BOY, the mission is kind of the culminating milestone for your first 21 years of life. Everything you do in church is supposed to help you get ready for looming trial of a lifetime. And I say looming only in the sense of you knew it was coming, and it was going to be a big deal. Yeah, I had a testimony of the church, but it wasn't imprinted in my heart and soul as much as it is now. I will admit, I had never finished the Book of Mormon before the MTC, which is where I finished it for the first time and started gaining my own testimony.

Bolivia was a shocking experience, in so many ways and on so many levels. I really had no idea what to expect when I received my call to serve in the Bolivia, Santa Cruz mission. I knew where Bolivia was, that it was a Spanish speaking country, and that it would be a crazy experience. It was, completely. I sincerely grew to love the people I walked among for 2 years, and was truly sad to leave after that 2 year period was up. The mission really changes a lot of things about you, but it doesn't change who you ARE at the core, which is a very big misconception some people getting ready to go on a missions have. Some people think they'll go, become this spiritual giant, and come home and be praised for their goodness wherever they may go. Not true. In fact, I know of quite a few guys that returned home and have since lost their way. I will admit I have strayed a bit at times, but ultimately I know I am doing well right now and am on the right path, which brings me to the main point of this post. I'm 26, and STILL trying to find myself.

After so many milestones in life, you'd think a person would come to at least a semi-understanding of who they are and what they want from life. Yeah, I have a religion I believe in and know to be true; I'm in college, almost done with a Bachelors degree in a field I'm still not sure I really want to be in; I go on dates every once in a while, but ultimately I still feel lost in regards to who I am. The essence is of me establishing who I am, to myself and to those around me. I remember once instance being told that I "faked everyone out" on my mission from the letters I would write and such. Of course I never intended to fake anyone out of who I am, just it seems as you go through different phases of life, you are a different person.

I know I am a different person now than I was a year ago. I was living with my mission companion and some buddies in a House in Provo, but simply put, I just was not progressing. Then the best thing that could have happened to me, (of course I see this now) did: I got fired. Being fired forced me to move home and look for other opportunities. Since then I have been riding the bus to school everyday. Even riding the bus has given me a broader outlook on life. The world is full of so many different people, who each have their own issues going on and their own lives they are living. The other day there were two guys talking about having DUI's and not being able to drive. To them, that's the "norm". To me, that's insane. But what is the norm? Who decides what normal is for me? I really believe only one person can: Me.

Honestly, the next milestone in my life is to get married. Yeah I'm close to graduating, but if I want to use the bachelors I will have, Graduate school is a must. This means graduation doesn't mean a TON, at least not yet. My grades aren't stellar, which makes me believe it will be tough to actually get into a good school, if any at all. I don't doubt the choices I have made in my school career as I feel they are right for me, right now, but who knows.....maybe this year will bring something to light or something will change. I'm not obsessed with getting married, by any means, as I know it will happen eventually. However, my parents have been on me like white on rice to get married, well at least to date, but who can blame them? They had 2 kids by the time they were the age I am now, but times are different and so are people, of this I am sure. Of course I want to get married. I want the companionship, the love, and ultimately to achieve that milestone of my life. In a Mormon society, for a young man, it seems after the mission the only true milestone you have left is a "Regular" life: A career and a family. Hopefully along the way you can accomplish other goals you set for yourself, have adventures, and enjoy life. I suppose once you've reached that milestone, the next one is for retirement...but then what? I guess it just goes full circle.

I like where I am right now, I really do. I have a Mustache, which is something that is giving me an identity I never had before. And as dumb as it sounds, I feel like it's helping me be more confident in who I want to become. It's just something I changed, something small, that has made a difference in how I feel about myself. Yeah, Mustaches aren't the most popular facial hair, and unfortunately have been associated in our society with those of lesser moral values, but I feel like it's something that actually fits me. I even heard my Mom say she likes it. I'm not sure how long I'll keep it, but for now it's what I need to do, for me. Maybe this whole post is about selfishness, but in the end a person has to be somewhat selfish to figure out who they are. All I know is right now, I'm in it for the haul!

Thisblogposthasnotitle

Yes. I made the title like that on purpose, because I couldn't think of an actual title.

I really should be studying right now, like really, but I felt like I needed to post this.

Basically my life is actually........wait for it..........good. Yeah I know right? Me, being optimistic about my life? Yeah I know I tend to take a pessimistic viewpoint at times, but sometimes it's hard to see the light when you feel you are surrounded by darkness.

7 months ago I was in a rut. I felt I was so deep, it was literally going to be impossible to get out. Then the best thing that could have happened to me, did. I got fired. Getting fired SUCKED, of course, but I've come to realize that most times in life when you feel like the worst thing ever is going on, it's going to have good results. Things are going so well right now, I just feel like something "bad" is bound to happen. If it does, well I will try to remember how i'm feeling today, October 22, 2010.

Moving home was a hard decision, not something I ever wanted to do, but I know I needed to be there. When Austin came home, it was a confirmed right decision. Even though I'm not around much because of school and work, the entire family is currently living there. It's kind of crazy to be honest, but we all have different schedules so there are rare moments when we get to spend actual time together. One such event was last week when I went to Brent's swim meet. He's been swimming for 3 years, and this was the first opportunity I have actually had to go. It required driving to Roy, but it was worth it. I love that kid and am proud of him for taking swimming seriously and improving from last year. I love being around Austin. We went to Tucano's last Saturday, just the boys (Him, Brent and myself) and had a blast. I forget how awesome my brothers are. Camille is getting married in less than a month, and I'm so happy for her. I'm stoked to have Tony as a brother-in-law as we already get along and have sports in common. I look forward to the days and times we will get to spend together. I know my parents are behind me in life. I know they don't seem to have words of comfort at times, but I know they are there.

I'm doing well in school, meaning I'm actually doing ok on my tests. I've scored above 80 on 2, and another in the high 70's. The first of the year doesn't count because I wasn't in this groove yet. Basically I'm learning to enjoy school, and actually LOOK FORWARD to going to my classes (except one because it's exceptionally boring...grammar "Language Structure" class). I have people around me in my classes who want me to succeed, who truly care about my efforts and are willing to help me.

I finally am able to go to church on a weekly basis, and have decided I will go for all 3 hours. This has been a challenge for me in the past couple years. But I know it's important, and now have a calling (Second Counselor SS) and will need to be around. I also received some pretty intense promised blessings when I was being set apart by Brother Zarbock, especially in regards to my future family.....Sorry, that's too personal to post here :) I just know being in the ward is where I need to be

So did I get fired for all these things to happen? Did I get fired to possibly meet my wife? Did I get fired to actually do well in school and be excited for it? I know the Lord has plans for all of us and by trying our best, he'll make things work. I've just never felt like things are so on track before, even before I was in the rut.

I finally feel like I'm ACTUALLY figuring out How to Live Life and Be good at it. Guess I never really knew before.... :)

Positive thinking, That's all it takes.....Right?

So there I was, sitting in church yesterday when a thought came to me. This thought was nothing unusual, and probably something really obvious to most people; the thought was "Be Positive and Happy."

When I was first starting out on my mission, I had a companion Elder Baadsgaard (yes, that really is his last name, and sounds just like you would guess). He was a good kid, and ended up being an assistant later on during our service. We were only companions in the MTC, but he really helped me change a lot and it was through this same idea. He helped me to always see the positive and happy side to things, rather than the negative and unhappy. Again, this is a very obvious solution to some of life's biggest problems, and although it doesn't ACTUALLY solve anything, I truly believe it can be a great influence on anyone's life.

Skip Warner is a guy in my current ward, BYU 206th, BYU 21st Stake (this is just so i can remember, plus I want to start actually remembering people for when I go back and read this 20 years from now). I've NEVER seen him in a bad mood, sad, or down, or just being alone. Of course I've really only seen him in social/church settings, but even in those people sometimes aren't in a good mood or make it apparent they don't want to be there. To me, he is an amazing example of one who is truly trying to (how about that alliteration) follow the Savior. He often gives his testimony on fast Sunday, and did yesterday, which is where this post is stemming from. I didn't realize it at the time, but as I sat in my room last night planning out my busy week, this realization came to me; be positive and happy about my life and the things going on currently. There's just no valid excuse or reason to NOT be happy. He talked about school, and how so many people complain that school sucks and it's hard and annoying, and etc. He said something along the lines of "I enjoyed school while I was in it, sure it was hard, but I had fun. I don't know why anyone else can't do the same." It really is....baffling why I let school get the best of me. It's just school, not like it's going to affect my future at all....ok maybe that's the ONLY purpose. Nevertheless, I'm trying things different this week; I planned my week out, with the things I will do during the day, and am having 3 different people, maybe 4, monitor what I'm doing during the week and checking up on me sporadically, just to make sure I'm on top of things. This may seem somewhat "high school ish" and like i can't be independent, but I really think it will help keep me motivated. It also makes me wonder about the future. There are stats out there, I don't know of any real ones or anything confirmed, that once a person gets married, generally their grades go up. I think it might because of this reason.....they have someone who can be vigilant of their progress, and help them get things done.

I don't love my job, more specifically what I'm required to do everyday; answer phone calls from people in various countries. It's nothing glorious, it's monotonous and tedious, but it pays the bills. The few bills I have. There's just no reason for me to essentially not be happy about being at work. My job REALLY isn't that bad, I make pretty good money to answer the phone all day, the company is amazing, I have a lot of friends here, and with such a high unemployment rate, I HAVE A JOB. I'm blessed, and there's no reason for me not to be positive about that. Plus, I'm only here at work for....5 hours or less a day, not really a sacrifice at all. I just need to learn to organize my time better, and be more productive, efficient, and effective with my time.

Along with this new positive line of thinking, I'm going to start implementing the "Yes" theory. The movie "Yes Man" really has many implications of how much fuller and exciting a persons life could be if they started to say yes to things where they would normally say no. I'm not going to say yes to Persian Wife Finder, but a Yes to a party or a Yes to writing a Paper for no reason other than doing it (BYU has regular writing competitions), would really change my life in so many ways. It would make life feel more productive, more meaningful, and more exciting. Too many times I've found myself sitting at home on a weekend doing nothing more than staring at the wall, or my computer screen. Along those same lines, even IF I am in a home alone situation, hopefully with all these new things, that time would be used more effectively as well.

Along with these new things, I've decided to not be intimated by girls. No one really has any VALID reason to be intimidated; we're all human, we're all imperfect, no one is actually better than anyone or deserves anything less than the best. There's a girl in one of my classes who I've been wanting to ask out essentially from the first day of class. However, because of her obvious intelligence, she scares me more than anyone I've ever wanted to ask out. She's in a pretty intense major, and at BYU where everything is intense ANYWAY, It's not like it's any surprise that she's smart. Plus, being a girl in a heavily male populated major, in an already competitive field, she has to be even more of a genius to fit in. Yesterday in church I attended a "Dating and Relationships" class they have every once in a while. The teachers were the second counselor and his wife, whom have been married probably just over a year. This was the last week of a 4 week session, so they had everyone write down questions they had for them and for the class in general. I asked the question "How do I ask a girl out that intimidates me?" The answer they gave was basically what i wrote above in Bold. There's just no reason to be intimidated. What's the worst that's going to happen; she only has two options: Decline or Accept. Either way, life will move on and that's just how it goes. Jamund (teacher, wife is Carrie....Ferguson) made a good point too: what if everyone else thinks the same thing about her, and she never gets asked out because of this "Intimidation factor?" Break the chain, break the ice, break the cycle. Be different and confident, and things will work out for you.

I guess this post has turned into making some new goals for my life, and even though they aren't specific and don't have time frames, they really are things that I'm going to change which in turn will change who I am. I don't not like who I am currently, I just think there's so much more Jefe for the world to know and discover, and for myself to discover, It's unfair I've been this pent up for so long. Having these goals, these changes, is really making me excited and gives me something to look for. I'm really interested in other ways i can improve my life, to be better at it, and to better the lives of others around me. Isn't that one of our main objectives here on Earth? To progress and better ourselves and those around us? Seems simple enough, so why don't I or other people do it constantly? I guess that's part of figuring out who we are and what we stand for. I'm 25 and just barely starting to figure it out.

My 24th year of living, "Things Sure were different 25 years ago"

I'm 25. I seriously can't believe it; I really don't feel that much older. I suppose from October 3rd to October 4th, I'm still only a day older; but it feels like oh so much more.

I've been meaning to write, but couldn't think of anything I wanted to write. A review of my 24th year will be the best thing I think, for myself and for others.

School. I'm still in it, as much as I dislike the whole idea. I know it's necessary though and have finally decided to stick with a major. Communication Disorders, although a heavily female populated major, is what I have chosen to stick with. I started it last winter semester and even though I still didn't do that well in one of the core classes, I feel like it's where I should be at this time. I know I just need to get done with school, then move on to grad school, or whatever else life throws at me. I've already written about my classes this semester, so I won't go into depth with that. Currently I'm scheduled to graduate December of 2011, basically a year longer than I originally expected. The reasons for this vary, but the biggest is probably because i started the major so late. Byu thinks it's a good idea to offer certain classes only certain semesters, and to make you take classes in a certain order, and because of this I can only finish as fast as i can.

Mosiah 4:27 : "And see that all these things are done in wisdom and ^aorder; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order."

At least I have the end in "sight," it's closer than I think, I just wish it were closer. Of course after I finish my undergrad, Grad school will happen, but I've heard grad school is alot more chill than Undergrad. All in good time.

Work. I'm still at Nuskin, still working in the call center, still a peon. I've tried to obtain and applied to various jobs, but with no success to my avail. Of course when I didn't obtain a position, and after so long, and feeling that I more or less deserve it or am at least qualified, it's been hard to be motivated to stay here. Right now in the world I live in, its a good thing to have a job at all. I've also tried to look at the whole situation in a long run/positive way. Had I obtained the last position I applied for, I wouldn't have been able to take classes this semester, and it would take me even longer to finish school. So i'm grateful to have the job that I do, get paid the amount I do, and work for such a great company. I think there's more at work than myself with this one.

Dating and relationships. Since my birthday last year, 2008, when Camille broke up with me 3 days before, I have had 2 relationships: Chelsea Wrathall, and Kat Miller. Both of them were great relationships, and I learned a lot about myself, who I am, and what I want in a future eternal companion. Dating still isn't fun, well the drama that comes with dating at least; for this reason I haven't dated much lately, but have decided I need to get back on the bandwagon and get er done. I feel like my next step in life is to find a wife, and move on. I'm 25, and even by "worldly" standards, 25 is an old enough age to be serious about finding a wife. It's been on my mind a lot and I know it's important enough to be one of my top priorities. My Mom told me the other day she was reading my mission letters, and the the last one I wrote before leaving talked about me getting married within 2 years. I've been home almost 4 (January will mark that time frame), so its time I get on it. My cousin Sterling Davis was married last week, October 1, and he hasn't even been home from his mission a year yet. If he can do it that fast, why can't I right? I have a goal to be married BEFORE Austin gets home from his mission. So before or by June 3rd 2011.

Big or significant events. There hasn't been very many significant or big events in the last year that are extremely note worthy, but I can think of a few. I think the biggest thing was Austin leaving on a mission, June 3rd, 2009. Not that I ever doubted he would go, I just didn't know much he would get into it or what the feel would be. So far, 4 months down the road, I've been nothing but Impressed. It's so amazing the change I can see and feel from him, just from his letters. Before he left I spent a lot of time at home, and many weekends just to be around and support him as he was preparing to go. Even before he left, I saw him go through some pretty intense changes that most missionaries go through after having been out for some time.All I can say is that I'm extremely proud of who he is becoming and of the spirit and power that emanate from his letters. We write back and forth sometimes just between us, personal things, and advice for one or the other. I think he is learning to relate more to me than anyone else in the family since I'm a "recent" RM. It's been a great experience for him, the family and myself as well. Other than that, except for a few trips, nothing too exciting happened in the last year. Camille is still dating Brandon, who's a good guy, I just don't know what's going to happen with that one. Brent is a genius. He nailed a 32 on the ACT, WITHOUT STUDYING......seriously, how did the genes skip me? He's 16 now, driving, and starting to date. I feel old. My parents both turned 50 this year (2009), which makes me feel even weirder seeing how I'm exactly have their age, by number at least. As my Grandma would say, according to my Dad, "Things sure were different 25 years ago"

As I continue to live life and try to be good at it, I will make goals for the next year, goals which i will complete when they are within my power. I never really make goals, and maybe that's why my life is usually uneventful. More coming soon.

Boating is never......Typical...or Mabey it is...but it's Lake Powell right? (Second Title: Way To Be on Top of it....)

For anyone that has a boat,
or goes boating, knows that with toys comes problems. My family has been boating since i was basically a baby, and even though we haven't had a boat my whole life, we've had one off and on more recently than not.

The Last boat we had was a Cruiser, 28 foot, with a cabin and everything else. Heat, A/C, Fridge, Bathroom, everything anyone would need. It wasn't at all a houseboat, but you could essentially live on it. I've always wanted to go on a house boat, but i just haven't ever had the chance. If anyone wants to invite me, i'd be more than willing to accompany them :)

So the boat we have now, well actually it's not even ours, is a 24 foot cobalt that my uncle bought from an old neighbor/friend of ours. The main difference is it being an open Bow. (is that the right form/word for bow?) The main problem with an open bow is the non-escape from the sun, whereas with a cabin boat, you can escape it. We knew this would be different and maybe a problem, but we were ready to go for it anyway.

So as i stated before, Boating and toys=something usually goes wrong. We decided to leave on Thursday July 16th, in order to get down to Powell and maybe even go out on Thursday night. Well of course timing is everything, so by the time we got to Powell and checked into the hotel (somehow they had "canceled" our reservations...Problem #1, but easily overcome), the sun was already going down. We decided that since we already had paid for the slip for Thursday night, we would hurry and launch the boat and get it in. So we back the boat down the ramp, get it in the water, and try to start it....Dead. Absolutely NO battery power at all. FUN! So there we are at about 8:30, the ramp closes at 9, it's getting dark, other boats are pulling off, and ours is dead in the water, at least it was still on the trailer. So my uncle pulls a battery charger/jumper cable thing out, and hooks it up to the battery. We let it sit for a second, and....nothing. The batteries were that dead. Apparently somehow the radio, vhf not like music radio, had been left on thus draining the batteries. Completely no juice left. (Way to be on top of it us.....) So my Dad walks over to another boat that was just launching as well and asked if they could help jump us....jumping a boat is NOT easy either. PLUS, the guy was pulling the trailer out meaning his wife was in the boat to help us....since she really didn't know how to drive the boat that well, it was even more fun to pull her up along side us. I jump into her boat, (Crawling over carts and cases and boxes and boxes of alcohol...seriously were they there to boat or to get drunk? Couldn't they just as well gotten drunk at home? Somehow i don't think that Drinking and boating go too well together....some people.....)...to catch it and hook up the cables, and we let it sit for a second, still, nothing. So i then proceed into her boat and rev the engine up a bit in neutral, since she didn't know how to do it, and BAM it started. FINALLY. So after like an hour after putting the boat in the water, we got it started.

We back off the trailer, my Dad pulls it out, and goes to park it. Well....now it's dark, so we need to turn the lights on right? Guess what, they don't work! MORE FUN!! We figured out that the red/green light bulb was burned out. Then the spot light didn't work, but that was the cigarette lighter adapter thing. Anyway, we were basically floating in the dark. But we had a mag light, so it was ok!. So we decide to try and find where the slips are (this is the first time we've ever been to Wawheap (Sp?) Marina so we had no idea where they were or where to go. You'd think it'd be easy, but in the dark, it was extremely difficult. We motored around but got into shallow water in the bay and decided almost to just dock by the ramps. We pull up and there's another boat hanging out who was kind enough to lead us over to the slips. So we dock the boat for the night, and head up to our hotel room. Day 1 down.

Day 2. We woke up kinda late if i remember and went down to the restaurant for a the supposed "Breakfast to die for" as Jenn had been told. I didn't think it was that great, i mean not bad or anything, but definitely not to die for. After Breakfast we went out to finally go boating, exciting right? Well we get on the boat, and get everything ready to go, thinking all is fine. The Boat starts fine, sounds fine, it's a wonderful nice day out, problems ended last night right? Wrong. So we pull open the engine compartment, for something random, and notice water leaking from somewhere in the engine compartment. So we're thinking a broken hose or something since it was lake water. So after trying to figure it out for like half hour, then going to the CRAPPIEST Marina parts store EVER, (Good Job being crappy store) and calling the mechanic who....TUNED UP the boat...Way to be on top of it Mechanic......we decided that it would be ok to continue the trip. Even knowing there were problems with the boat, having been informed they weren't imminent, we didn't actually have any problems the rest of the time. It seems though, every time i can remember, there always has to be SOMEthing wrong with the boat/snowmobiles (which we no longer have), etc.

So even though the boating went fine, other things just....yeah...something, there's always something right?

The next day we went to breakfast again at the hotel restaurant. We were expecting about the same service as the day before, but did we get it? what do you think? This is about how it went:

Server: "Hi how are you guys today, what can i get for you?"

US: We order. I get the buffet (Smartest move any of us made probably on the trip), and get my food.

40 minutes later: Uncle Dan "Lets ask this other kid to see where our food is...."

our Waiter to Jenn: "Ok. here is your egg, and unfortunately we didn't have any English Muffins, so i made the liberty of making you wheat toast..."

Jenn: "Umm...ok. But i wanted White Toast, and do i get the rest of the food i ordered? I ordered the "Powell Special" (equivalent to like a grand slam at Denny's), and i wanted scrambled eggs...."

Waiter leaves, and then takes 9 years to come back. Mean while, i get up and get Jenn some White Toast from the buffet, and my sister eggs with cheese in them since the bus boy somehow thought she was done with a full plate of eggs, and took them away.

Way to be on top of it Hotel Restaurant, that was supposedly "To DIE FOR..." Yeah we almost died waiting and in hunger. Good job. High Five!!

In the end we didn't pay for my buffet because the waiter realized what a crap job he did, but i guess it happens. It's amazing what you pay for at a Vacation Destination. For example: $54 for items for lunch, including a $12 tube of Sunscreen, 2 bags of ice at $4.50 each, and other food items. it was pretty much ridiculous. But you go on vacation, and you have to pay what they ask. Oh well.Yes, this was a PB & J that was part of a $54 lunch ticket. Although the food was only like probably $10 of it. Good times. Oh this is also where the waitress informed us "Oh yeah, they have a full on restaurant there and everything." The restaurant was.....a store, and an ice cream/snack bar thing.

That night we docked the boat and decided to go into Page for dinner. For some reason we were all craving Taco Bell, easy & fast right? WRONG!!! We pull up to the T Bell, and walk up to the door, which was locked. Odd. The hours on the door say they were open until 9 (SERIOUSLY? 9!?!?!) It was like 8:45, so we should have been fine right? There are a TON of people inside, so my Dad knocks on the door and someone lets him in. We walk in, and it's just a disaster, it looks like no one has cleaned for like 2 weeks. Food on the tables, garbage everywhere, and PEOPLE everywhere. WHAT THE HECK is going on?!?! We walk up to the counter and this is the response we get:

Lady at the counter: "Hi. So, if you want to order you can, but it'll be a 40-45 minute wait on your food."
Dad: "What....ok....umm bye"

Way to be on top of it Taco Freakin BELL!!

HOW!!! At TACO BELL!?!?!?!?!? Wow....FUN! It turns out, i Think at least, it was a Customer Appreciation day or something, so they were way backed up. Whatever I guess. So we went to Denny's, where we actually ate food and had good service. I guess there were SOME snags at Denny's. The 3 girls ordered Chicken Noodle soup, easy right? No, they were out. Way to be on top of it Denny's. Ok they did fine in the end, but i'm sure the timing (after trying to even get INTO the Denny's parking lot alone...was time consuming) would have been about the same. Although, i do love the new Chicken Burritos from Taco Bell. .89 cents, awesome burrito. No complaints there. But i'll never wait 45 minutes for one. No way.

On top of ALL this, Kelly had a pretty fun Friday night. We're on our way to Paige, page? not sure how to spell it. Anyway, on our way to paige Kelly gets a voice message, or gets a call, or something. No, Uncle Dan got a call from ADT saying that Kelly's garage alarm had been tripped. So to make things even more fun she had to call them back and see what was going on. It turned out to be her roommates sister, whom Kelly was unaware was staying at the house, trying to get in. The great thing, about everyone one of the people we "left" at home knew about it and was basically on their way. Ben, my Mom, Marge, i'm sure her Home Teachers, Bishop, The Pool man, Easter Bunny and probably a few random people were informed too. We love Kelly :) At least she doesn't have to worry about being left in the dark.

Really, Way to be on top of it ADT. That's what we have security for right? At least that's comforting.

I think the absolute Highlight of the trip was my Dad. Apparently a few weeks prior to this trip he was with his scouts or whatever and trying to order food at subway. He says this was about how the conversation went at the register:

Dad: "Ok so that's 12 subs, $5 a piece, so $60 right? Also can we get two bottles of water?
Guy behind Counter: "Total seven tuuoo" "water you want?"
Dad: "Brent, please speak to him in SPANISH and tell him we want two bottles of water"
Brent: "Dad, that's rude"
Dad: "Tell him it's RUDE to not Speak MY LANGUAGE when he lives in MY COUNTRY"

Ok, i don't know if the last line was true, but i wouldn't doubt it. The funny thing is he's had this mass run in with people not being able to speak english, and is getting pretty fed up. Every chance we had this trip he made sure we knew. It's a good thing the guy at the Restaurant (please see above) spoke English, or he probably would have thrown him out the window. We love my Dad too :) ( LEARN SPANISH DAD!!)

So either my Dad and the rest of America needs to learn Spanish, or everyone needs to learn English...since there are more than Spanish speakers flooding our country. Way to be on top of it immigrants.

I can't think of any other incidents that happened to us while we were there. I'm pretty sure there were some, like certain couples not getting along, but that happens :), and i can't think of any at this moment, and this post has been in the making for like a month or more. If any of you reading this can remember, let me know k? Despite all the problems and crap we had to go through, Lake Powell was just as awesome as it could have been. It was amazing weather almost the whole time, the water was amazing and clear, and warm. The sun was amazing, i got a nice tan while everyone else got burned. I love my awesome tanning ability :)

This Is why lake Powell was Worth it. Oh, so worth it

The rainbow bridge. I haven't ever been here, that i can remember. Supposedly i came when i was a little kid, and back in the day you could basically swim underneath it. You have to walk 2/3 a mile to get there now, and when it's 105 degrees....it's almost not worth, but still pretty Cool. Pretty sure we all got heat stroke on Saturday afternoon. everyone started getting grumpy and no one wanted to do anything, so we found a cove and jumped in to cool off. Happened more than once, and i don't think i've drank so much water in my life.

Yeah, We were Definitely on Top of it this trip.....Ok maybe less than NOT AT ALL. But hey, you know, after like what, 20 years?, boating, you think we'd have learned. But it's been awhile since we had a boat, and we are re learning :)

I'll Have you Knowe (Like the English way....)

I was at Wal-Mart the other day, and noticed all the toy impossible-claw machines were titled

"Toy Shoppe"

First of all, shouldn't it be called Suck your money into a hole-waste of time-trying to impress a girl-impossible claw thing-Shop? Second......What? Where the CRAP did ShopPE come from? AREN'T WE IN AMERICA? Maybe i've been spelling it wrong as "Shop" all my life...anyway, hence the title.

So I know i haven't written anything for a REALLY long time, but i just wanted to inform all those....probably 3 people that read this....that i had my first banjo lesson today, from this guy....

Geoff Hohwald

Man, What a guy. First of all, what a sweet name. I think i was actually going to be a Geoff, but my Grandma feared i would hate it and convinced my parents to just go normal Jeffrey. Maybe i should change my name to Geoff? Opinions?

When i got my Banjo, I received with it an Instructional DVD and Book (The book is lost...) So since i didn't really have any other way to learn, i put it into my computer And Geoff taught me for a while. The Banjo is weird....So if anyone has any Pointers on playing the banjo, to make it feel easier or more comfortable let me know. I don't want to make it feel like the guitar, but any similarities would be awesome. I'm guessing there's not though. It's probably one of those things that takes getting used to. I tried to think of a good example, but it's late and i can't think. My brain is dead. Sorry this is all you get for now.

Ok i lied. I recently discovered a secret truth....i think alot of people know so it probably isn't much of a secret, but really Restaurants will make you whatever you want. It happened the other day at Wingers, and tonight at IHOP.....i'm going to start making up things i want and make servers make me special orders. (It's kind of like the exceptions thing at my own work. People think we have a rule and like the "System" or "computer" won't let us budge from that rule. But 99% of the time, it's just a rule and can be bent.) Because i'm the customer, and the customer is always right. Even though today at work I am 100% sure that the company was right and the customer was just completely insane and dumb and should never call us again.

I seriously WONDER how some people live so long in this life, not knowing how to live life and be good at it. Really. I'm not a pro, but i think i'm getting pretty good at it. I treat people right, I don't drive insane (ok only on occasion has Reagan had any reason to call me a utah driver...), I'm honest with people, i understand situations and what i'm doing in them, and if i don't, i don't act like an IDIOT trying to figure them out. Casual is what makes the world go round. All the people tied up in politics and debates, and unnecessary stressful situations, are wasting their time. Well that's my opinion...not sure where that came from. But it's true! Ok we are ALL children of the Same God, but sometimes i wonder if some of us were adopted from another God of Another Planet :)

PS. I Read today that Boozer is signing with the Jazz for this year. I really think they need to just get rid of him. Steve thinks he'll get traded, and i think that would be awesome. Then we can sign Millsap, he can develop more, and him and DWILL (if he actually stays with Utah) can dominate and destroy the Lakers. Ok it's a dream i know. Dreaming is good right?

PSS. My Rays are catching the Yankees. This is good news and makes me happy.

It's Been So long. Hi......This is it....well for now, it's Me.

Hello All you Blog readers!!! It's currently 3:38 AM, and i'm at work. End of Month, covering calls from Spain. It's quite fantastic really. I get to sit here and do basically whatever i please for about 4 or 5 hours, until the normal markets open. I'm currently watching the move "Atonement," and doing this as well. I know it feels like I've been away for....ages....I thought it had only been a matter of weeks, but apparently it's been over a month....and the last post i wrote was short and sweet. So even longer since I've really hounded anything out. This last semester kept me crazily busy, so busy I never realized I was that busy until the semester ended and I had nothing to worry about. I realize now too that I even let some of my friendships slide down the hill a bit, nothing irreparable. I'll be ok. I think?

I don't really know where to start. School is over, Thank goodness. I don't think i'll end up with HORRIBLE grades. I know for a fact in my Speech Anatomy class I didn't do well, at all, but i am pretty sure I'll at least end up passing the class. Sometimes that's all that really matters right? I had a teacher who made a good point once. When you are a professional "Whatever," and you have a masters or a PHD in this field of "Whatever," no one is going to care in any way whatsoever what grades you got in you undergrad courses. Of course grades do relate somewhat to where you go to Grad school, which could also in turn matter when you get your PHD and people don't recognize it unless from a certain school, but in the end it's just the same. Education is important. I love learning, i just don't test well. I've known that my whole life, and I guess that's how it's always going to be.

My brother got his mission call to the Arizona, Tucson mission. I cannot believe it is already time for my little brother Ozzy to go on a mission. I've been home now off of mine for 3 years and almost 5 months. So it's been 5 1/2 years since i was getting ready for mine, like my brother is now. I had the opportunity to go through the temple with him for his first time last Friday, the 17th, and had a pretty amazing experience. You know how the Lord will answer things for you when you aren't really looking for an answer to any particular question? Or maybe you don't.....it's kind of crazy actually how he does things sometimes. I was just excited to finally get back to the temple, I hadn't been since December sometime. The Lord in his tender mercies decided it fit for me to received probably the strongest testimony of temples and the importance of them, that anyone could ever have. I haven't had any kind of strong spiritual experience since being on my mission, that I had in the temple that day. The strangest thing of the whole ordeal, as i mentioned above, was the fact that i was not expecting anything like this to happen at all. The Lord knows what he's doing, that much i know for sure. He puts things in your path and people in your life to help you gain an understanding of simple things, complex things, small things, large things, anything really that he wants you to understand. And in ways you wouldn't expect, at all, in fact, in ways you would think completely the opposite.

I gained a new Friend this past semester, a Friend that was one of the unexpected things/people referred to above. She was in my ASL class, for the entire semester, and only the last 3 or 4 weeks or so did we even become real friends at all. She is a very good friend to me now, and we've already shared alot together. I know she trusts me and i trust her. She is the reason i was able to gain such a strong testimony of the temple. I really don't know honestly if anything will really ever happen with her, and that's ok, since sometimes people come into your life for a short season and for a particular reason (no rhyme intended :) ) and once that reason has come and passed, i suppose it's possible to 'lose' that friend, although in my case i hope to never lose her as a friend. I don't lose, or let go of, friends very easily. Probably one of my stronger...downfalls...or maybe it's a strength. I just know what it means to have a good friend, and i appreciate those that i care about and care about me the most.

This movie is weird.

I'm still at my job. I considered quitting for the summer and going to install security systems. I decided against it though more because i feel it important to be around to spend some time with my brother before he leaves. I know i've threatened to quit Nuskin for...like 2 years now...or longer...probably longer....but i just can't seem to get away. I keep applying for jobs, and not getting them, but when i find out who got the job, it makes sense and i agree they were better qualified for the job. If anyone knows of any actual good, real, jobs for me. Let me know k :)

I guess this is where I come to an end. I know this isn't really alot for over a month of no writing, but the fact is I just have come to a blank. It tends to happen when you're at work at 3 am.

Reflections

I think I may have mentioned this before, but this year has changed me a lot. I am a very different person than i was this time last year. I will probably write about all this in more detail later on, but for now this will suffice.

1. I have a career goal. For the first time since before i started college and was just excited to get back into school, i actually feel excited to start the upcoming semester. I no longer feel it is going to be a waste of time as i have for the past year or so. It's a good feeling having at least some kind of direction.

2. 22 1/2 years i hadn't ever kissed a girl, and in one year I have kissed 3. I wouldn't say I've been a player because each of the 3 girls i've kissed, have been special and meaningful. Along these same lines, having been in relationships i have learned a lot about myself. Mainly self confidence and appreciation for good quality people.

3. My Grandmother passed away on June 9th of this year. I know that people die everyday, but it was really the first time anyone actually close to me, that I've known my whole life, has passed on. I guess the main reason this has changed me is just because it's really made me realize how precious life is, and that I should spend my time better. I probably don't even listen to my own words and advice as much as i should, but that's the truth. I wish i could have spent more time with her before she left us, but I know she is happier where she is and she is watching over me.

4. Weddings. I have had so many friends get married this past year, including two of my best friends. This hasn't made me WANT to get married, but it's something I know needs to be thought about and is in my upcoming future. I really cannot even imagine being married soon or even engaged for that matter, but if it were to come along I'm pretty sure I would welcome it.

5. Spiritual wellness. I am not where i want to be, and I know I need to improve. I love my current calling in my ward, and the opportunity i have to work side by side with my Bishop. I've kind of slacked off a little bit, but i think it has a lot to do with the end of this semester. I love my Bishop though, he's amazing and such an understanding man. Sometimes i really wonder what it would be like not being a member of the church. As hard as it is to live up to some of the standards, I know it's the best thing I can do for myself.

6. Music. My appreciation has grown. I am actually writing my own songs, playing in different tunings, learning the piano (and loving it), and just appreciating it more than i ever did before.

7-10: An overall appreciation for life. I've tried to be happier, tried to be more positive, learned more about myself in this year than I ever thought possible. It's kinda crazy just to think of how much I've been through in my life, and then this year happens. It's kinda awesome honestly. I remember a lesson Rhett Gagon gave in my sisters ward about trying to live life more like Christ, to try and think daily how to be more like him in any small way. I think that if everyone tried to do that, the world would be a better place. No, I KNOW it would be a better place. Even if you don't believe in Jesus Christ as our Savior, still just following his example and the way he lived his life when he was here, would resolve so many conflicts. Plus during this time of year, people are generally nicer and more giving. If we could just keep that attitude the rest of the year.


I applied for a new job. I should find out soon if i got it....I'd be quite excited if I do.

A Sunday Evening Post

Basically I'm bored. That's what it comes down to. Ok, it's also a new Month and i see the last post i made was exactly a month ago today. So i guess a substantial amount of things have happened since then, so i believe an update is due.

Update: Nothing new has happened. There done....now what...

It's been over a month since things with Camille ended. We still talk every now and then, i still miss her when the small things come up, but I'm learning to move on. I never knew break ups could be so hard. But i am grateful for the things i have learned from everything i've experienced over the past month. I've learned a lot about myself, and what i want (at least in the dating/relationship field), and where i need to be.

Living in a highly dense and saturated mormon city, it feels like the pressure to get married and be the perfect family is always surrounding me. But honestly, i don't let it affect me. I know I am in control of my life currently, and I have the means to do what i need to, and to progress (even though i feel like it's been a year since any progression has happened), and do better in departments where I am lacking. Ok this is making no sense. Basically what it comes down to, I am gaining an ability to blow off pressure and people telling me to do something I'm not ready to do. I want to figure my life out for me and for what i want, not what other people think is best for me. I have felt a strong sense of "depression" over the last few months, or maybe even the past year, but I think it's time to get out of that. I don't know how i'm going to get out of that, bu it's going to happen. I am feeling good about a new major, a new direction, and I just want to start fresh on something new.

I am going to abandon Spanish and PDBio altogether, and go with a new direction. In my student development class, we recently went over our Strong Interest Inventory tests. Alot of people speculate how accurate these tests are, however, I feel that if the person answered the questions without thinking about it or answering it how they "wanted" to answer, it's pretty accurate at telling you what you are interested in and where you'd do the best. My top "Theme" is Artistic. I LOVE the arts. Paintings, Art History, Music, Guitar, Anything that has to do with self expression, sincerely fascinate me. However, I know it's not something I would necessarily enjoy doing for a lifetime career. The test told me what I am most interested in, is working the medical field. This i already knew. It also told me I wouldn't necessarily do the best there either. It did however give me some fields i would probably do really well at. One such field I have considered before, and heard mentioned about how amazing it is, and have thought about looking into. Speech Pathology. I don't really know everything that it entails, but i know it's a pretty big field and a needed career as well. A classmate who is in that field, told me about what he knows so far from it. It sounds pretty interesting, and i plan on going to see a counselor tomorrow to talk about it and see the options. I'm pretty excited actually. I'm actualyl excited for something related to school, which makes me happy. It's a first.

As far as school goes now.....I'm not sure where i stand or what to do with my current situation. I have a Spanish test coming up on Wednesday. I haven't been to that class since the last time we had a test....which is very very very bad. I'm not sure what i'm going to do. I just found out last night that i missed a D&C test. I emailed my teacher begging for Mercy, but i'm not sure to what avail since i miss that class farely alot as well. All i know is this: Starting tomorrow November 3rd, 2008, I will miss no more classes if at all possible. I know i have to go to do well, and i want to do well. I really do. I just gotta do it.

A good friend told me once, "Action precedes Motivation." And boy is that true. I just have to figure out how to have motivation to take action to have motivation to do the thing i haven't been doing. It's like a circle or chain. One thing leads to another....

Last night i went and saw Maple Grove play. Mallory Davis is the keyboard player, and has been a good friend of mine for quite a while now. They are pretty awesome.

The Rays made it to the World Series, only to lose 4 games to 1. How dissapointing. How come the team i cheer for can't ever actualyl WIN the championship? Sucks bad. Even BYU isn't doing that well anymore. They BARELY beat CSU...they should have annihalted them. Hopeully the Jazz can do it this year, if anyone deserves it or needs it, they do. GO JAZZ!!

I am good. I think. I think i need to tell myself i am good, and i will be good. Thanks to everyone who keeps in touch with me and cares enough about me to worry about what i'm going through. I've just been going through a semi weird, kind of rough, hard, and confusing time in my life recently. I'm sorry if i've been bugged or annoyed or snippy. I'm just trying to figure my life out, and there are many people that are great and so supportive. I wouldn't make it without you. Thanks.

This Life i Live

This Life. Wow...what a fun time huh? It is currently 2:11 am. I am awake, when my eyes tell me they are sleepy and want to rest, but my brain and soul cannot rest. How can things seem to be so perfect one moment, and then shatter to the ground in the blink of a tired eye. I can't understand everything, I don't expect to, especially when nothing makes any sense. All that i do know, is I honestly feel OK with things. I don't know what that means, but I guess it's not bad. I only know I've become closer to Camille than i have ever been with anyone else, and I really hope she can figure things out. I know we all cross paths with people in our lives for a certain reason. I am pretty sure I know the reason, or one of the reasons Camille and I have crossed paths, and i will take those lessons into my life and hopefully will be able to apply them, and be better because of her. I randomly wrote a poem about how i feel right now. Unusual, since i don't usually write poems. I guess new experiences bring new things to the board. Who knows, i may even make it into a song.

Aren't God's Creations awesome?










Isn't he the cutest thing you've ever seen?

Mishna.

This life.
This life i live.
This life we live.
Living and loving, that's what it's about.
How we do it, depends on us.
The choices, decisions, and paths we choose to follow.
The people we meet, friends we make.
Those we fall in love with, those who break our hearts,
Those who know us best
It is not all for nothing.
There is a purpose.
A purpose i do not fully know.
Knowing this is all i care about right now.
This life we live
This life I live
This life.

Re-Route please?

Well here i am at work. Unusual? Probably not, considering i am here everyday. Today is the 24th of the month. I know it's September, but that's really beside the point. Today at work I will be flooded with calls from people asking "My order has a shipping date of the 24th, can I please stop or cancel the order?" OK, first of all the orders print off at like 5 am. Once the order is printed, there is really almost nothing we can do. It's not like I can walk over to the warehouse, and find their order, unbox it, tear up the order form, and process the refund. It IS possible, but 100% not feasible. There are literally thousands of orders printed off everyday, and on the 24th and 25th, even more. Even more, you have TWENTY THREE days to call and stop your order from shipping. It's really not that hard. If your order has already been sent out, i can't even call UPS to send it back to us for at least 2 days. THEN sometimes they won't even let me. It'd be better if everyone just got with the program, and watched your own back. That'd be nice. Now for the real reason I'm writing this entry today.

To know where i am coming from, it might be best for you to read a former entry, Changing Gears. When i decided to drop my classes that semester, long ago, i felt like that was the right thing to do at that time. I don't know why. It just felt like the right thing to do. As far as right now, I feel more committed to school, more committed to my life and what i want it to be. I'm still not 100% sure where my life will lead, or where I will be going with all this, but I feel like PDBio is still the right direction. I am retaking Chemistry 105 this semester, the class i had such a hard time and struggled with exactly a year ago. I'm already feeling like I understand it better, I'm getting a better grasp on it, and I'll be able to get through it better than a D-. If i get a C, that's fine with me. I'm aiming for a B. I know an A is pretty much impossible since the after grade in the class is a C, and that hasn't ever really changed. I know there are people in the class that do get A's, but heck there are people that get 4.0's graduating in Law. Yes, there are geniuses on this earth. Desafortunadamente, I'm not one of them, and I'm honestly ok with that. We are all given different gifts and talents, and being a genius is not one of mine. I'm smart enough, however, to get through Chemistry and through my current standing major. I love the idea of helping people improve their lives, and giving of myself and time. I probably won't end up going to medical school, or even be a doctor. But as someone very close to me right now has really made me realize, there ARE other options besides being a doctor. I want to succeed. I want to have a plan. I feel like after the last hour of the morning, i feel like i have a plan again.

I don't know where this is all coming from, but I have a pretty good idea. I've had so many, i guess you could call them "signs" that i CAN do Chemistry. We got a new roommate named Ryan, and what is his career plan? To study a language and go pre-med. He's in Chem 105 right now, and works in a doctor's office and is looking into maybe getting me a job there. Sunday at church, I was doing interviews with my Bishop, well being there while he did interviews, and met a girl named Jennifer. What does she do? Why she works in the Chemistry Department at BYU. She has office hours that no one comes in to, AND she has the EXACT same bday as me...10/04/1984. (yes my birthday is in a week and a half...i accept anything. Cash is nice too. You can make checks out to Jeff Mabey. Thanks) Anyway, i feel like I'm being directed right now, and being offered all the help i can get, and i need to take advantage of that. I just know all i need to do is figure out how to do well in school....and in life. That's what it's all about right? Summing it up, I'm re-routing gears. Back to the old. We'll see....

I'm currently taking a Student Development class entitled, Life Planning and Decision Making. I don't know why I didn't get into it before. We really haven't delved much into making big decisions, but the small things we've done and the things we have talked about, have made sense and made me think alot about my future and decisions i need to make. Even though BYU is a tough school, and sometimes i feel like I'm not cut out to be here, I really do like going to school at a great University. Oh and our Football team is doing awesome too. Never hurt anyone :)

New Month, New Post, New Me?

What a Beautiful Creature

No. The new me is NOT a Giraffe. Although maybe I should look into getting one.....

There have been a few people on my back (good thing Giraffe's have long necks and backs....) about writing a new entry. Ok not really a lot of people, mainly just ONE person...and they know who they are...(Insert sound Giraffe makes here) Speaking of, does anyone know what sound a Giraffe makes? When teaching a child sounds that different animals make, how does a teacher instruct a child what this sound is? Do Giraffes make sounds? This is a mystery...one that must be resolved.

To discover this unknown and unsolved sound mystery, we will turn to the two best places i know online. Google and Wikipedia. Even though i'm sure most college professors, and high school teachers would discourage using Wikipedia as a source, i find it pretty much amazing and love it. I mean look at THIS. Just scroll down a bit, and click on Sounds and WahLah. For all you lazy people, i will quote here.

"Although generally quiet and not vocal, giraffes have been heard to make various sounds. Courting males will emit loud coughs. Females will call their young by whistling or bellowing. Calves will bleat, moo, or make mewing sounds. In addition, giraffes will grunt, snort, hiss, or make strange flute-like sounds. Recent research has shown evidence that the animal communicates at an infrasound level"

My first question on this statement of a Giraffe's noise emissions: Does anyone know where i can hear the "Strange flue-like sound?" I'd be quite interested in finding out. I think it's kind of cool, however, that to court a hot Giraffe babe, all the guy has to do is cough and hack. I'm glad humans don't use this technique, i just can't imagine it going to well for the guys.....

Guy: (See's attractive girl) "Hi, will you.... *Cough Cough*..."
Girl: (disgusted look on her face) "are you ok? Do you smoke? Do you have bronchitis? Are you contagious? Should I cover my mouth when I'm talking to you? What is it you wanted to ask me?"
Guy: *stops coughing, puts head down and walks away*

I imagine a Giraffe Courtship (more specifically a BYU courtship) goes something similar to this:

Jack Giraffe: "Hey so i was *hack hack, cough cough, wheeeze* wondering if you would like to *grunt, cough, hack hack* go to the homecoming *COUGH* dance with me?"
Bethany Giraffe: (thinking to herself) 'wow he's really got the moves with all that coughing going on' "Well ok...i was planning on going with Jerome Giraffe, but he didn't have a big COUGH at the end like you did there."
Jack Giraffe: *COUGH COUGH....(lung comes flying out and hits Bethany in the face)*
Bethany Giraffe: "Let's get married tomorrow?"

Giraffes seem to have it easy. I actually wish dating were that easy. I guess if dating wasn't hard, it wouldn't really be worth it in the end. I suppose. I can't complain though right with my current situation.

I have an older sister named Camille. I have known her for 23 years, 10 months, and 27 days (something close to that). I also have an Aunt Camille who i believe i have known since i was born. One of my best friends sisters name is Camille, although she goes by Cami. Mike married a Cami (also short for Camille). Chad is marrying a girl named Cami (also short for Camille). Counting (yeah i can count, sometimes), that makes 5 Camilles that I am associated with. Chad's Camille i don't really know. Even without her, it makes 4. Lets be honest, Camille is not the most popular name. There's nothing wrong with the name, it's a great name. According to the Social Security Website, the name Camille was ranked #369 in 1982 (the year my sister was born). It seems only, fewer people gave the name Camille to their daughter than say the name Ashley, Amy, Brooke, Jessica, Gertrude (ok that one probably isnt' true), etc. So I mean who would have guessed that I would date a Camille? I mean it's not like i planned on it, it just happens right?

In previous posts I have talked about girls I met online, have dated, wanted to date, etc. Those posts at that time were true and had much deep felt thought and time put into them, and since I put my truest feeling in them, I received much guff and crap from a lot of people. I guess a blog isn't the best place to put ALL your feelings, but I felt like they needed to be shared at that time. Let me just give a little expwanashon of the newest addition to the Camille's in my life.

(Name removed) is her name. She is awesome. If there was one word to sum her up, that would be it. Awesome. She's from Idaho, the not-so-small-as-I-previously-had-thought town of Pocatello. Her Dad is not a potato farmer (believe it or not there are people that have other occupations in Idaho besides Potato farmers. Amazing i know). She has a simple and good family. Strong in the gospel, good morals, and good overall people. Camille and I met online. Go figure. I really didn't expect anything else to come from online dating after I ended things with Allison. Actually, I decided to cancel my membership to the dating site I was using, and met Camille before it actually expired. I guess good things happen for a reason right? Well we've been officially dating now for over a month. I can't believe how fast the time flies, it's really just incredible. Don't start asking me when we are getting married because A. We are in no rush at all to worry about that. B. We've known each other for like 2 months (I know at BYU that's almost too long right? Good thing she lives in Sugar House and graduated from Utah State and wasn't ever a BYU girl, so dating longer than 2 months flies right? =] ) As far as how things are going....things are going well. We're having fun dating, and for now that's what's important. Oh, and did i mention i'm just over a month older than her? Yeah. Pretty rad. Camille number six, added to the list. (almost a rhyme. Go me.)

As far as the rest of my life goes, I don't really know what to say. I'm still stuck at Nuskin. I love the company, I really do. I just wish I could move up. I try, and it doesn't happen. Perhaps it's just not meant to be. School....I'm registered...which is something i suppose. I still don't know what to do with my life. I'm still going to major in spanish, (Changing Gears), but other than that I just don't know. If anyone could figure it out for me, that would be FANTABULOUS. I really don't want anyone to tell me what to do. I can and WILL figure things out. I have to. I'm retaking Chem 105 again this semester (Again because I was in it a second time, but dropped all my classes...), and this time I plan on sticking to it. I really do WANT to understand it and be able to advance. I'm sure it's pretty sweet stuff once you fully understand it. I'm trying to get into a piano class as well. I have always had the strongest desire to play the piano, and since I know the basics, I'm pretty sure I could pick it up pretty quickly. School will be interesting.

Well I think this post can make up for the lost time and lost Jeffrey Scott Mabey many of you people have been searching for. Recently I've pondered about going by Jeffrey instead of Jeff. I don't know why, it just sounds more mature and I think I actually like it. I dunno. I guess that's another thing to figure out. I find the name of my blog Ironic. Half the time I write, I write about me trying to figure life out. Sometimes I think i'm really not that good at living life and being good at it. But hey, I'm trying my best. That's all that matters right? I suppose.

Mishna.

Some cosas...Ok just some random stufff!!

It's Sunday night, and the moon is bright....well not yet actually, since it's not even 8:00 yet when I'm starting this. But who cares.

I have decided that there are some things that irk me, yes I-R-K, and I'd like to share them with the world. I could try and put these in some kind of order, and i might have to do that after i get them all down and commented on. We will see.

My List of Things that I-R-K the crap out me

1. Folding Laundry. Seriously. I can guarantee that there is not one person on this planet that actually enjoys folding their own clothes after getting them out of the dryer. How many teenagers have rooms that look like a shop vac full of clothes finally overloaded and exploded leaving clothes everywhere. If it wasn't so...unattractive...to have a neat and tidy room, I'm sure i would have jeans hanging from my light in my room, shirts gone missing, and socks being carried away by rats. OK my room doesn't have a rat infestation, that i know of...perhaps i should invest in some Mouse/Rat traps just to be sure. Actually, i kind of have always wanted a pet Rat. I hear they make great little friends....just not to kids. Good thing i don't have kids
2. Celery. Enough said.
3. Pickles. Whoever thought about taking a vegetable, Cucumber, and soaking it in raw evil...OK Vinegar isn't really evil, but I'm sure it's available in Hell....is one messed up person. People tell me "oh you have to try this kind of pickle. It's better than this other kind" OK...think about this. If i go out and eat a rock and it's gross, do you really think a different kind of Rock is going to taste better? Highly unlikely. A pickle is a pickle, and Pickles are disgusting. Even the word makes me wanna hurl. A world without pickles, would be a better world indeed.
4. People who ride your tail while driving, when the person in front of you is going slow and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it because everyone on either side is going the same speed. I hate it so bad. If you get on my tail, at all even if we are the only two cars on the road for 1000 miles, i will slow down to below 10 of the speed limit. You can pass me when you have the chance, and for all i care flip me off. I will just wave and smile as if i did nothing wrong. Because i didn't. However i am guilty for speeding myself. I do find it interesting though when I'm going 80 on the freeway, the speed limit is 65, and there are people flying past me. No wonder I've never had a speeding ticket. THAT'S what speeding is. Oh and back to my original thought....I CAN'T do anything. SO GET OFF MY BUMPER!!!
5. Thongs. OK....as a guy i feel i am entitled to this. The Thong, i suppose one could say is just underwear. Which is true. And as I'm sure MOST any guy would agree, CAN BE attractive. HOWEVER, there are certain circumstances and places it's just not right. For example: When you are at a church activity, and you are wearing a dress made of thin black material, and the sun is shining and shines right through it, thus illuminating for all the world to see. Some things just need to be kept private from the whole world. Sure for a husband, fiance, or perhaps even a boyfriend i suppose one could say wearing thongs is attractive. Along those same lines, we don't need to see it when you bend over. Usually it's pretty obvious...OK not all the time, but usually one can tell....we just don't need to see it to be sure. This is my matter of opinion, nothing more :) If you have the body to wear one, or don't and still choose to....well that's your decision. But as far as I'm concerned, we don't need to see it! I guess on the flip side, Granny Panties aren't any better either. Unless of course you're a granny. Then it's OK. And hot.
   
6. Ignorance. Mainly this comes from my being a member of the LDS Church. It really doesn't bother me as much as it's just annoying. Before assuming something, or saying something, make sure you go to the source first. I don't go into a McDonald's and ask "How much fat does a Nacho Cheese Chalupa have in it?" Then go on the corner of the street by a taco bell with a sign that says "Chalupas have 9,000 grams of fat. It will lead you to death and destruction." Go to the source, find out the truth and facts before you make any judgments. *note to reader. I actually do enjoy a Nacho Cheese Chalupa every once in a while.
7. Straws-I suppose one could argue this invention revolutionized drinking from a paper cup. However, i feel it is much more refreshing drinking directly from the glass. You can feel the ice on your lips, feel the liquid rush past your teeth, and overall it's a better experience. I suppose it DOES facilitate drinking if you only like a little bit at a time, or you have a mouth that only opens 2 cm, or you are handicap and need a straw. Those are about the only exceptions i can think of. I guess if you like straws, you can have mine. Down with straws!!
8. People who haven't seen the Goonies. Again, enough said. If you are reading this and haven't seen it. Call me right now and we will watch it. Thank you.
9. Blog entries that don't save the font like i want it to. I only say this because the stupid font keeps reverting back to the small font from my "Note to reader." I don't understand it, and would like some help on figuring out on how to make it work right. That'd be great. Thanks.
   

Well that's all I can think of right now. Currently I have a pile of clothes on my bed, thus inspiring this blog entry. I know it really isn't too exciting and i do apologize for that. Oh well. Get over it. Or just live your life and be better at it OK?

So what

So basically it's been a long time since i've written. Life is going by pretty freaking fast and crazy. I can't really explain anything, or why it is as it is. Oh well.

Catch up:

Still don't know what i'm going to do with my life. I was at my parents house this past Sunday, and had everyone asking me what i'm going to do with my life. Heck if I know. And of course when everyone, oh yeah everyone consists of: Mom, Dad, Grandma, Aunt, Uncle, Sister....is asking what you're going to do, they give their advice too. Basically what it comes down to, is probably just me majoring in Spanish and doing something with my life that i don't know. So if anyone has any bright ideas at what i should do, let me know k?

Weddings. I've gone to one, and there will be 2 more done by this weekend. I have one today, Blake Ross, and one on Saturday, Ace Stryker. It's crazy. I still can't fathom Mike and Jake getting married. I guess its just that time of life right?

Stuff: I went on a river trip a week ago. River Rafting for a week, seriously amazing. It's the second year in a row i've done it. I am pretty sure it will become a yearly thing. My roommate Mike was telling me how it just helps him relax, and it's his power-charging trip for the year. I think it's going to have the same affect on me as well. It was so nice to just relax, and not worry about anything at all. Fabulousness.

Right now it is 3:24 am. I am at work right now, taking calls from Spain....basically (i use that word alot) i get paid $16.93 for doing nothing. Can't complain.

I don't really know what else to write about. Thats it for now...life is about the same as usual. Only i am kind of dating a girl right now. But i learned from past experiences that writing details isn't a good thing cuz people get the wrong idea and i never hear the end of it....so if you want to know details, you'll have to ask :)

That is all. Have fun not reading more :)

I'm Proud to be an American

Today is July 7th. What does that mean? Well 2 things. 1) It's Monday and it sucks cuz i'm at work. 2) July 4th has come and past. I really meant to write a post ON the 4th, i just never got around to it. Anyway This is my post for the 4th.

Basically, to me, being a citizen of the United States is probably one of the best things ever. There is a feeling of patriotism and pride that is indescribable. I believe that citizens of other nations feel pride for their country also. During the Olympics the people wear their colors, and raise their flags with Pride. However i firmly believe that being part of the greatest nation on earth, knowing what our fore fathers have gone through, seeing how many people want to COME to the US, it really is obvious I live in the greatest nation on the earth.

I'm an emotional person. So sue me. Whenever i sing the national anthem in a group of people, or hear it on the 4th of July, and just ponder what it really means to be an American Citizen, it gets to me. I don't usually cry or sob or whatever, normally it just really touches me. In a manera unica....u unique way, that nothing else can do. I know many, many, many, many people hate George Bush, and hate the politics of the United States, but i am a firm believer that the leaders of America really do their best, as far as they know how, and as good as they can. No one is perfect, people make mistakes. I am also a firm believer that our founding fathers were guided and lead by God in forming the constitution, breaking away from England, and claiming our Independence from Great Britain. I really am so thankful for everything they went through to give me what i know now as the best Country in the world.

Having spent 2 years in Bolivia on a mission, my eyes were really opened to how lucky I am. People in the world hate the United States. They hate George Bush. They hate what America stands for. But why then, do people migrate to the US like crazy? Despite what they say, they know it is a truly blessed country. There are many opportunities in other countries to have a great life, and to prosper. It is possible. Bolivia has so much potential, the only problem is the people are so used to living poor, they don't believe it possible to come out of the poverty they are stuck in. I guess all you can do is just instruct and try to teach the people. You give a man a fish....and teach him how to live life and be good at it.

God Bless the U.S.A.

(Some of my Favorite American songs)

God Bless the U.S.A.
By Lee Greenwood
If tomorrow all the things were gone I’d worked for all my life,
And I had to start again with just my children and my wife.
I’d thank my lucky stars to be living here today,
‘Cause the flag still stands for freedom and they can’t take that away.

And I’m proud to be an American where at least I know I’m free.
And I won’t forget the men who died, who gave that right to me.
And I’d gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today.
‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land God bless the U.S.A.

From the lakes of Minnesota, to the hills of Tennessee,
across the plains of Texas, from sea to shining sea,

From Detroit down to Houston and New York to LA,
Well, there’s pride in every American heart,
and it’s time to stand and say:

I’m proud to be an American where at least I know I’m free.
And I won’t forget the men who died, who gave that right to me.
And I’d gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today.
‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land God bless the U.S.A.

AMERICA

Written by Neil Diamond

Far
We've been traveling far
Without a home
But not without a star

Free
Only want to be free
We huddle close
Hang on to a dream

On the boats and on the planes
They're coming to America
Never looking back again
They're coming to America

Home, don't it seem so far away
Oh, we're traveling light today
In the eye of the storm
In the eye of the storm

Home, to a new and a shiny place
Make our bed, and we'll say our grace
Freedom's light burning warm
Freedom's light burning warm

Everywhere around the world
They're coming to America
Every time that flag's unfurled
They're coming to America

Got a dream to take them there
They're coming to America
Got a dream they've come to share
They're coming to America

They're coming to America
They're coming to America
They're coming to America
They're coming to America
Today, today, today, today, today

My country 'tis of thee
Today
Sweet land of liberty
Today
Of thee I sing
Today
Of thee I sing
Today

And of course, the best of all:

The Star Spangled Banner

By Francis Scott Key

Oh, say, can you see, by the dawn's early light, What so proudly we hail'd at the twilight's last gleaming? Whose broad stripes and bright stars, thro' the perilous fight, O'er the ramparts we watch'd, were so gallantly streaming? And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air, Gave proof thro' the night that our flag was still there. O say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave? On the shore dimly seen thro' the mists of the deep, Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes, What is that which the breeze, o'er the towering steep, As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses? Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam, In full glory reflected, now shines on the stream: 'T is the star-spangled banner: O, long may it wave O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore
That the havoc of war and the battle's confusion
A home and a country should leave us no more?
Their blood has wash'd out their foul footsteps' pollution.
No refuge could save the hireling and slave
From the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave:
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

O, thus be it ever when freemen shall stand,
Between their lov'd homes and the war's desolation;
Blest with vict'ry and peace, may the heav'n-rescued land
Praise the Pow'r that hath made and preserv'd us as a nation!
Then conquer we must, when our cause. it is just,
And this be our motto: "In God is our trust"
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

I love America.