Finals. Ugh.

At least I only have 3. I'm sure I'll be in grad school one day, looking back on how easy this all actually was. I guess it's worth it. Right?

Blogging For Credit, That is Extra

I have an English Class, 316-Technical Communication, where my teacher informed us if we keep a journal or a blog, he would give us Extra Credit. He wants us to write at least once a week, and since I already have a blog AND I haven't been updating like I should be, it's good motivation to do so.

This Entry is just going to be my classes and what they are and how I feel about them thus far in the semester.

ComD 331-Clinical Phonetics: Taught by Dr. Shawn Nissen, whom I had for Speech Anatomy last winter semester, should be interesting. The lectures up until now have been more or less a slight review of Speech Anatomy, which isn't necessarily that great since I didn't do terribly well in that class last semester. However, having taken a Spanish Phonetics class, it will be interesting to see the difference in technical parts of language between Spanish and English. The Lectures haven't actually been terribly boring, and overall Nissen teaches pretty well. We have Lecture twice a week (M, W 1-1:50), and then a lab on Friday (various possible times). Expected Grade, from knowledge of Nissen's Exams and my past phonetics experience, and level of interest: B

ComD 330 - Language Development: Taught by Dr. Martin Fujiki. Under circumstances of being taught by a different teacher, I would say this class would be really interesting and captivating. However, under Dr. Fujiki, it unfortunately is not. I actually find the material quite intriguing, since Language is something we all just....know....and to think that it also has to develop in some way, is interesting. Fujiki has the most monotone voice i've ever heard, and the worst part, he know it and doesn't do anything to change it!! I guess when you get stuck in a rut, or get stuck in your ways, it's pretty hard to change; you would think a TEACHER would at least try to captivate their class. The good thing about this class is having people I actually know to keep me company, awake, and help me do well. Justin Morgan, Christina Saurers, and Liam Clancy (whom i also have 331 with, and was in SA last year with me) are all in the class together. Hopefully this can make up for the yawn-ness of a class. Expected Grade: B or higher. (only because of how boring it is.......)

American Christianity: Taught by John Fluhman. This class is AWESOME!!!!!! Basically it is what it sounds like, Christianity in America, but as far as I can tell, it will hardly be about the LDS church. The class is HUGE, and I believe for the reason that as LDS students, most people don't really know much of anything about other religions, let alone their own.....maybe we know about the LDS church....but where Christianity stems from, and the importance of background before Joseph Smith, not at all. On top of it, the teacher is extremely animated and exciting to listen to. Luckily i have this class AFTER Fujiki....so it makes up for the boringness of the former. Too bad i don't have it before, i'm sure it would make Fujiki more bearable. Expected Grade: B+ or A-

English 316 - Technical Communication: Taught by Nate Jackson. I've never really been a huge fan of English classes, but I think this will be the one during my career at BYU that I'll actually enjoy all the way through. My teacher, ironically, works full time in the Marketing department at Nuskin, and is a Part Time teacher. Major props....i'm pretty sure that's crazy. Then again, he only teaches one class (mine) and there are literally like...20 students...less than that. However, there is one specific Kid in my class that makes it freaking Hilarious. I'm not sure he's 100% in the head, I think he might have a slight handicap, So he just says things sometimes and gets so excited, it's pretty much the funniest thing ever. This is the class i'm actually going to be blogging for, which hopefully will get me back into the rhythm. Expected Grade: B+ or A.

Stats 221 - Principles of Statistics - I'm just going to say one thing. Gross. I'm not excited about this class, At ALL....ZERO excited. But i guess if I HAVE to take it.........I will........At least i have some conocidos in the class....but that doesn't help much to motivate me to go. But I go. I go, because I need to go, I have to Go. So I go. Expected Grade. B as well.

I Have a Bowling Class, but that doesn't start until halfway through the semester. Should be fun. hopefully an Easy A......

The semester is almost 3 full weeks in. It ends on December 10, well at least classes do. Finals run through the 18th. I'm really trying extra hard this semester to get to ALL of my classes...yes I've already missed a couple, but I'm really trying to dedicate myself to going to every class, that is required. This is My goal. Only miss the classes I literally can't make it to. (Circumstances being: Out of Town, Work, Being too ill to leave my house, Family functions *Weddings, etc.*)

I really do enjoy blogging. It helps me relax some....to get things off my mind, and also share with the world. I know i need to put more pictures on....but i'm just not a picture saavy person. Plus every time i put pictures on, i can never get it to look exactly like i want. I hate the parameters the internet has....i guess it HAS to, to work, but i think someone should invent some way to make it like a piece of paper, where i just draw what i want, write what i want, WHERE i want. THAT would be an awesome Blog template. Times ten, plus pollo.

Schoooooooooool..........

This Is how i feel.

School starting always leaves me with so many mixed emotions.....I'm actually quite relieved not to be BORED out of my mind everyday, but at the same time, i'm not terribly excited about going to class and having homework. Actually, homework won't be so bad. I honestly just dislike physically going to class. By the time you drive to campus, or walk, whatever, then hike 8 miles it seems, then get to class and you're only there for less than an hour.....it seems like alot of effort for nothing. At least that's how i feel :) But i'm actually ok with my classes this semester. Only ONE of my classes i know of now, i don't know someone. It's nice to have an acquaintance in class....it just makes it easier. I'll report more as the semester goes.

GET TO IT!!!

It's Been So long. Hi......This is it....well for now, it's Me.

Hello All you Blog readers!!! It's currently 3:38 AM, and i'm at work. End of Month, covering calls from Spain. It's quite fantastic really. I get to sit here and do basically whatever i please for about 4 or 5 hours, until the normal markets open. I'm currently watching the move "Atonement," and doing this as well. I know it feels like I've been away for....ages....I thought it had only been a matter of weeks, but apparently it's been over a month....and the last post i wrote was short and sweet. So even longer since I've really hounded anything out. This last semester kept me crazily busy, so busy I never realized I was that busy until the semester ended and I had nothing to worry about. I realize now too that I even let some of my friendships slide down the hill a bit, nothing irreparable. I'll be ok. I think?

I don't really know where to start. School is over, Thank goodness. I don't think i'll end up with HORRIBLE grades. I know for a fact in my Speech Anatomy class I didn't do well, at all, but i am pretty sure I'll at least end up passing the class. Sometimes that's all that really matters right? I had a teacher who made a good point once. When you are a professional "Whatever," and you have a masters or a PHD in this field of "Whatever," no one is going to care in any way whatsoever what grades you got in you undergrad courses. Of course grades do relate somewhat to where you go to Grad school, which could also in turn matter when you get your PHD and people don't recognize it unless from a certain school, but in the end it's just the same. Education is important. I love learning, i just don't test well. I've known that my whole life, and I guess that's how it's always going to be.

My brother got his mission call to the Arizona, Tucson mission. I cannot believe it is already time for my little brother Ozzy to go on a mission. I've been home now off of mine for 3 years and almost 5 months. So it's been 5 1/2 years since i was getting ready for mine, like my brother is now. I had the opportunity to go through the temple with him for his first time last Friday, the 17th, and had a pretty amazing experience. You know how the Lord will answer things for you when you aren't really looking for an answer to any particular question? Or maybe you don't.....it's kind of crazy actually how he does things sometimes. I was just excited to finally get back to the temple, I hadn't been since December sometime. The Lord in his tender mercies decided it fit for me to received probably the strongest testimony of temples and the importance of them, that anyone could ever have. I haven't had any kind of strong spiritual experience since being on my mission, that I had in the temple that day. The strangest thing of the whole ordeal, as i mentioned above, was the fact that i was not expecting anything like this to happen at all. The Lord knows what he's doing, that much i know for sure. He puts things in your path and people in your life to help you gain an understanding of simple things, complex things, small things, large things, anything really that he wants you to understand. And in ways you wouldn't expect, at all, in fact, in ways you would think completely the opposite.

I gained a new Friend this past semester, a Friend that was one of the unexpected things/people referred to above. She was in my ASL class, for the entire semester, and only the last 3 or 4 weeks or so did we even become real friends at all. She is a very good friend to me now, and we've already shared alot together. I know she trusts me and i trust her. She is the reason i was able to gain such a strong testimony of the temple. I really don't know honestly if anything will really ever happen with her, and that's ok, since sometimes people come into your life for a short season and for a particular reason (no rhyme intended :) ) and once that reason has come and passed, i suppose it's possible to 'lose' that friend, although in my case i hope to never lose her as a friend. I don't lose, or let go of, friends very easily. Probably one of my stronger...downfalls...or maybe it's a strength. I just know what it means to have a good friend, and i appreciate those that i care about and care about me the most.

This movie is weird.

I'm still at my job. I considered quitting for the summer and going to install security systems. I decided against it though more because i feel it important to be around to spend some time with my brother before he leaves. I know i've threatened to quit Nuskin for...like 2 years now...or longer...probably longer....but i just can't seem to get away. I keep applying for jobs, and not getting them, but when i find out who got the job, it makes sense and i agree they were better qualified for the job. If anyone knows of any actual good, real, jobs for me. Let me know k :)

I guess this is where I come to an end. I know this isn't really alot for over a month of no writing, but the fact is I just have come to a blank. It tends to happen when you're at work at 3 am.

Need I have a reason?

Need I have a reason to be watching my favorite movie of all time two days into the semester. NO! I don't have homework yet, and I'm waiting to get a code i bought off eBay for my Math class, so i can't even pretend to start yet. Plus Blackboard isn't working for my other classes. Nothing i can do. The Goonies will suffice. (I will be inserting Lines from the movie as i write this, as i hear them)

So i go to BYU. BYU did not have a stellar football season. They were over rated, and really came out too confident in themselves in going undefeated. Sure they went undefeated last year, but that's beside the point. I'm glad they had a "crappy" season, maybe it'll help them realize you can't promise perfection. Now, Need I have a reason to agree with Steve? (please click on Steve and go read and then come back here) I don't think i should. Utah did awesome. They deserve to be #1. I am a BYU fan, always have been, always will be, was raised one (and did not betray them like other people I know), and i'm just calling it like it is. Although Utah won't get deemed champions, maybe it'll prove something needs to change in the BCS...as if that were a mystery anyway.

(I know you're down here One-Eyed-Willey, I KNOW you're here!)

I mentioned in my last post I had applied for a job. This job is a different position within Nuskin. I'm pretty sure my life career is not going to be at Nuskin, in fact I know that is the truth. However, while i'm in school they provide pretty well paying part time job. Answering phone calls all day isn't the most glorious of positions, but it is doable. Especially when you have co-workers to laugh with about the idiotic people that call in.

Example from today:
Me: Thank you for calling Nuskin, my name is Jeff, how can i help you? (All in one breath)
Customer: I've been taking the Cartilage formula (self explanatory) and after just one week i've gained 10 pounds.
Me: I'm pretty sure our vitamins will not make you gain weight. (Thinking in my mind....did you realize it was Christmas and i'm sure you pigged out...?)
Customer: I can't take any vitamins, they all make me gain weight.
Me: Oh ok. Let me setup that refund for you *meanwhile talking to Product Support on Instant Messenger and finding out its not possible, but whatever*

That's what I deal with all day. I interviewed today for the new position. I don't think the new one is anymore glorious or great, but at least it's off the phones. Basically i would be the "assistant" to the girl that does all the daily updates, gathering information, making sure everyone has the things they need for the day. Hence the title "Info Coordinator." I felt good about the interview, as good as one can feel i suppose. Although last time i had an interview for a different job internally, i was told after i didn't get the job that i was arrogant and prideful. Whatever. No one is perfect, but i don't know how that guy read into me that way. Oh well.

School. School started this past Monday, yesterday i guess it was. I hope this semester is enlightening for me. It really needs to be. I am starting my major, Communications Disorders (where i will later go into Audiology or Speech Pathology). I'm discovering something i really didn't know before...apparently this major is a pretty heavy female major. In my Speech Anatomy class, there are 48 girls and if you include the instructor, 6 Guys in the class. I didn't really know this, but honestly i dont' really care. I feel good about this major and It feels like it fits me and just feels....right.....so i'm sticking with it. I want to get into it and figure out at least if it's what i really want to do. I'm hoping though there will be a different direction i can go in rather than being just a speech therapist. In pretty much any major, that option is normally viable, and i'm guessing it'll be the same with this.

My Classes This Semester:

COMD 320 - Speech Anatomy - Supposedly this class is pretty hard. I heard some people talking about it in my ASL class, but they are in it now as well, so you can only really go off of what they have heard. The teacher seems like a pretty cool guy, and he was honest about the difficulty of the class. I loved Anatomy, and with that i think the learning will come easy/better to me than say...Chemistry.

COMD 133 - Introduction to Speech-Language pathology and Audiology- Online course. Hear it's cake.

ASL 101 - Class today wasn't held with my teacher. My teacher is being hired...not sure what that says about the program. The guy that taught us today is deaf and the head of the department. I took a semester in High school, and i think that will help some. It was kinda fun already being back in that environment. Kinda looking forward to it.

Math 110 - With my past un-excitement of Chemistry (AKA Math plus chemicals), I'm not sure how i feel about Math 110. I went to an orientation today and they basically said if you hadn't had math for more than 4 years...or in my case since High school....which i have not....then the class will more difficult than it normally would be. They suggest opting out of the class and taking Math 97. I really don't want to delay getting classes done anymore....I have a friend taking it, Eric is a math genius, So is Caitlin, So i think i should be fine.....Pray for me.

Christmas and New Years were good i suppose. I ended up having to work all the way up til Christmas Eve, but then had the 25th-28th off, which was a nice little break. After that, i worked graveyards the 29-31, which didn't suck terribly bad. I got paid extra, and just watched the Office. Got through the first 3 seasons...yep didn't get one call from Spain the whole time...actually i take that back. I did get one, but she wanted to place an order in Italy...so i told her to call back later, where i got her again and proceeded to transfer her to the Europe lines....Back to the Holidays. I spent the majority of the time with my family, whether it was my immediate or cousins or uncles, aunts, grandma, etc. All my friends were basically gone or busy with their own families. It was just a nice time to relax. New years was kinda lame....i kinda felt like being alone, so i was (plus i was catching up on sleep because of the graveyards.) Then Caitlin and Eric convinced me to come hang out, so i did and it ended up being fun. Not the most exciting holidays of my life though.

"Oh wow!! GUYS LOOK!! It's a BEAUTIFUL WATERFALL!!!" (One of the corniest and best lines of the movie)

I really don't have much else to write on right now....that's the basic update. I know i should write more often, but who wants to read nothing? I guess this isn't nothing....

"GOONIES NEVER SAY DIE!!!"

So you're telling me there's a chance.....

Do i really have time to be doing this right now? NO. Not really. But i'm doing it anyway cuz...well i need to.....

A. It's been way too long
B. I'm super stressed and I think this might take some of it away from me right now.
C. I've gone through a lot of things lately....that could use some sharing.

For the first real time in my life, I had my heart broken. It didn't make sense at all, but I am making more of it now. I've learned a lot about myself and who I am and what i want from a relationship. I hope to remain friends with her forever, because that's the kind of friendship we had. I know it wasn't easy for her either. Sometimes I still kind of question things, but it's all for something right? Besides that, I am dating someone again and it's going well, and I'm pretty happy about it to be completely honest. I fought it for a long time, and I think I felt like it wasn't going to happen because the time had passed. But, of course it's not always my plan or my way...in fact I'm thankful for that. If it were always up to me, I don't know where I would be.

School....OK. I don't know if I have even posted about me actually being excited about school....ever. Well I finally am. I have been taking a Life Planning and Decision making class, and through that and through one of those Strong Interest Inventory tests...you know the ones that ask you a bazillion questions about "Do you like This: (thing) or This: (other thing) Better?" Anyway, after taking that test, it came down and gave me some possible careers to look into. One such, Speech Pathology...which i had thought of before...was one of them. So i looked into it, and went and changed my major and i have my next 4 semesters setup. If everything goes according to plan i should be done in 4 1/2 semesters....I'll take a spring term or something....The only crappy part is the fact that I have to get my masters, so it'll be awhile still. But having an end in sight, and knowing what I'm actually going into makes life a TEENSY bit stressful.

I love music. I know this is nothing new, and I write about it all time. I discovered Aiden. They are kind of rocky/poppy/sorta unique band. I'm listening to them now. They almost remind me somewhat of AFI. ANYWAY, that's not my musical point in this post. I have been taking a Piano class this whole semester. It's been really awesome. You know how when you were a kid, and your parents forced you to take piano lessons? And you absolutely HATED it? Well, I had lessons when i was a young lad about 12 or 13 or so...maybe younger....and I was taking them from my Aunt. Well this particular Aunt had to move to Vegas, so once she moved I really couldn't take from her any longer....although i guess i could have, but those would have been expensive lessons. My other Aunt, actually probably my favorite on my Dad's side...there's only one...hahaha....started teaching us (Us being my sister, Dad, and myself) Now, why she stopped teaching us....I don't think I'll ever know. I just remember wanting to still play, (at least i think i did...i don't remember ever complaining about it) and then we stopped. So I have some very basic formal training, but really not enough to read music and what not. This class has helped me a lot. I am to the point now, where if I sit down and work on a song, I could most likely learn it in an hour or so. Ok maybe not that short of time, but I can do it now where as before I could barely read just the right hand. I love messing around and just having fun, and considering one of the string broke on my guitar recently and I'm too lazy to go buy new ones, I'm forced to play the piano instead.

Well I don't know how much stress this relieved, It kind of took my mind off some things, which is good I guess. I just need to get past the next week and a half, and I'll be good...until next semester starts at least.

Bye!

A Sunday Evening Post

Basically I'm bored. That's what it comes down to. Ok, it's also a new Month and i see the last post i made was exactly a month ago today. So i guess a substantial amount of things have happened since then, so i believe an update is due.

Update: Nothing new has happened. There done....now what...

It's been over a month since things with Camille ended. We still talk every now and then, i still miss her when the small things come up, but I'm learning to move on. I never knew break ups could be so hard. But i am grateful for the things i have learned from everything i've experienced over the past month. I've learned a lot about myself, and what i want (at least in the dating/relationship field), and where i need to be.

Living in a highly dense and saturated mormon city, it feels like the pressure to get married and be the perfect family is always surrounding me. But honestly, i don't let it affect me. I know I am in control of my life currently, and I have the means to do what i need to, and to progress (even though i feel like it's been a year since any progression has happened), and do better in departments where I am lacking. Ok this is making no sense. Basically what it comes down to, I am gaining an ability to blow off pressure and people telling me to do something I'm not ready to do. I want to figure my life out for me and for what i want, not what other people think is best for me. I have felt a strong sense of "depression" over the last few months, or maybe even the past year, but I think it's time to get out of that. I don't know how i'm going to get out of that, bu it's going to happen. I am feeling good about a new major, a new direction, and I just want to start fresh on something new.

I am going to abandon Spanish and PDBio altogether, and go with a new direction. In my student development class, we recently went over our Strong Interest Inventory tests. Alot of people speculate how accurate these tests are, however, I feel that if the person answered the questions without thinking about it or answering it how they "wanted" to answer, it's pretty accurate at telling you what you are interested in and where you'd do the best. My top "Theme" is Artistic. I LOVE the arts. Paintings, Art History, Music, Guitar, Anything that has to do with self expression, sincerely fascinate me. However, I know it's not something I would necessarily enjoy doing for a lifetime career. The test told me what I am most interested in, is working the medical field. This i already knew. It also told me I wouldn't necessarily do the best there either. It did however give me some fields i would probably do really well at. One such field I have considered before, and heard mentioned about how amazing it is, and have thought about looking into. Speech Pathology. I don't really know everything that it entails, but i know it's a pretty big field and a needed career as well. A classmate who is in that field, told me about what he knows so far from it. It sounds pretty interesting, and i plan on going to see a counselor tomorrow to talk about it and see the options. I'm pretty excited actually. I'm actualyl excited for something related to school, which makes me happy. It's a first.

As far as school goes now.....I'm not sure where i stand or what to do with my current situation. I have a Spanish test coming up on Wednesday. I haven't been to that class since the last time we had a test....which is very very very bad. I'm not sure what i'm going to do. I just found out last night that i missed a D&C test. I emailed my teacher begging for Mercy, but i'm not sure to what avail since i miss that class farely alot as well. All i know is this: Starting tomorrow November 3rd, 2008, I will miss no more classes if at all possible. I know i have to go to do well, and i want to do well. I really do. I just gotta do it.

A good friend told me once, "Action precedes Motivation." And boy is that true. I just have to figure out how to have motivation to take action to have motivation to do the thing i haven't been doing. It's like a circle or chain. One thing leads to another....

Last night i went and saw Maple Grove play. Mallory Davis is the keyboard player, and has been a good friend of mine for quite a while now. They are pretty awesome.

The Rays made it to the World Series, only to lose 4 games to 1. How dissapointing. How come the team i cheer for can't ever actualyl WIN the championship? Sucks bad. Even BYU isn't doing that well anymore. They BARELY beat CSU...they should have annihalted them. Hopeully the Jazz can do it this year, if anyone deserves it or needs it, they do. GO JAZZ!!

I am good. I think. I think i need to tell myself i am good, and i will be good. Thanks to everyone who keeps in touch with me and cares enough about me to worry about what i'm going through. I've just been going through a semi weird, kind of rough, hard, and confusing time in my life recently. I'm sorry if i've been bugged or annoyed or snippy. I'm just trying to figure my life out, and there are many people that are great and so supportive. I wouldn't make it without you. Thanks.

Re-Route please?

Well here i am at work. Unusual? Probably not, considering i am here everyday. Today is the 24th of the month. I know it's September, but that's really beside the point. Today at work I will be flooded with calls from people asking "My order has a shipping date of the 24th, can I please stop or cancel the order?" OK, first of all the orders print off at like 5 am. Once the order is printed, there is really almost nothing we can do. It's not like I can walk over to the warehouse, and find their order, unbox it, tear up the order form, and process the refund. It IS possible, but 100% not feasible. There are literally thousands of orders printed off everyday, and on the 24th and 25th, even more. Even more, you have TWENTY THREE days to call and stop your order from shipping. It's really not that hard. If your order has already been sent out, i can't even call UPS to send it back to us for at least 2 days. THEN sometimes they won't even let me. It'd be better if everyone just got with the program, and watched your own back. That'd be nice. Now for the real reason I'm writing this entry today.

To know where i am coming from, it might be best for you to read a former entry, Changing Gears. When i decided to drop my classes that semester, long ago, i felt like that was the right thing to do at that time. I don't know why. It just felt like the right thing to do. As far as right now, I feel more committed to school, more committed to my life and what i want it to be. I'm still not 100% sure where my life will lead, or where I will be going with all this, but I feel like PDBio is still the right direction. I am retaking Chemistry 105 this semester, the class i had such a hard time and struggled with exactly a year ago. I'm already feeling like I understand it better, I'm getting a better grasp on it, and I'll be able to get through it better than a D-. If i get a C, that's fine with me. I'm aiming for a B. I know an A is pretty much impossible since the after grade in the class is a C, and that hasn't ever really changed. I know there are people in the class that do get A's, but heck there are people that get 4.0's graduating in Law. Yes, there are geniuses on this earth. Desafortunadamente, I'm not one of them, and I'm honestly ok with that. We are all given different gifts and talents, and being a genius is not one of mine. I'm smart enough, however, to get through Chemistry and through my current standing major. I love the idea of helping people improve their lives, and giving of myself and time. I probably won't end up going to medical school, or even be a doctor. But as someone very close to me right now has really made me realize, there ARE other options besides being a doctor. I want to succeed. I want to have a plan. I feel like after the last hour of the morning, i feel like i have a plan again.

I don't know where this is all coming from, but I have a pretty good idea. I've had so many, i guess you could call them "signs" that i CAN do Chemistry. We got a new roommate named Ryan, and what is his career plan? To study a language and go pre-med. He's in Chem 105 right now, and works in a doctor's office and is looking into maybe getting me a job there. Sunday at church, I was doing interviews with my Bishop, well being there while he did interviews, and met a girl named Jennifer. What does she do? Why she works in the Chemistry Department at BYU. She has office hours that no one comes in to, AND she has the EXACT same bday as me...10/04/1984. (yes my birthday is in a week and a half...i accept anything. Cash is nice too. You can make checks out to Jeff Mabey. Thanks) Anyway, i feel like I'm being directed right now, and being offered all the help i can get, and i need to take advantage of that. I just know all i need to do is figure out how to do well in school....and in life. That's what it's all about right? Summing it up, I'm re-routing gears. Back to the old. We'll see....

I'm currently taking a Student Development class entitled, Life Planning and Decision Making. I don't know why I didn't get into it before. We really haven't delved much into making big decisions, but the small things we've done and the things we have talked about, have made sense and made me think alot about my future and decisions i need to make. Even though BYU is a tough school, and sometimes i feel like I'm not cut out to be here, I really do like going to school at a great University. Oh and our Football team is doing awesome too. Never hurt anyone :)

Changing Gears,

The jeep was rolling along the dusty, rocky, terrain with no problems at all. The sun was shining, a cloud here and there drifted by lazily casting small shadows over the land. The jeep drifted along, changing gears all the while. It came to a steep hill, the driver shifted to first and crawled up the hill. The young lad in the back seat was wondering how something could change gears. If it was stuck, wouldn't it be impossible to get out? He was also thinking of the clouds and the water that came from them. The streams, the rivers,the lakes, and the earth's many seas. Is this where the rain comes from? How do they all come together? Can the water in one river touch the water in the ocean? Is it the same water? Many questions like these often filled the mind of this mysteriously curious young one.

He hadn't undergone any training yet as he was a young boy, but despite his interest in the many questions that life brings, his deepest and most true desire was to understand the Human Body and how it worked. He would often be found with his nose in a book, or on the internet, or in a library reading about what he loved most. He often told those he would talk to that one day, he would grow up and be a doctor and help people live better and understand the amazing creation they were living in, the Human Body. Many other people in the great world also had these desires, something the young boy did not know.

The years went by and the boy grew up, passing through all the years of schooling, graduating from high school, falling in love, having his heart broken, learning new things every day as any normal person should. One day he decided he would go out and serve as a missionary, to help more people learn of the goodness of God and our savior Jesus Christ. He helped many people serving in the country of Bolivia, learning to love them and really change their lives. He really loved helping those people, and even more using the beautiful Spanish Language.

Que cosa mas bella que aprender una idioma tan buena como espanol? He truly loved speaking the language, and when it was time to come home he knew it would be a big part of his life from that point on.

When the now grown boy returned home, his family was very happy to see him. He let life slip by a bit before starting anything important like school or a job. Eventually though, like all people he set off to attend a University. The University he chose, and was gracefully accepted into, was a good one, one he was happy to be attending. He decided to go for his original dream and pursue a career in the medical field. He started taking classes to fulfill this path, and enjoyed them at first; however, this was not the case in the end. Some of the classes came extremely hard to him and he really did not know what to do. If i'm in this path, how can i change without feeling like i'm giving up? The clouds don't just give up and stop collecting water. The jeep didn't just stop at the hill and not go up it. Although, they both had to change something to do what they do best.

One day he was thinking really hard about the whole ordeal, just like how he used to think about our Mother Earth and her many wonders. Maybe i should try and work out a career speaking Spanish, the language i learned to love so very long ago. It would be just like the jeep's gears changing, the clouds collecting water and bringing new life to other parts of the world. That was it, his decision was made, he was changing paths. Although his love for the human body and medicine will always stay with him he knew that he would do better in this field and still be able to help people in other ways.

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That's it my friends. I'm changing my major. I'm dropping my classes this semester, taking it off to figure things out. I know it might be weird or lame or maybe...almost bad...to drop this semester, but i really feel it's for the best. I know that i'm following guidance i've received. Just to let anyone know who does read this, prayer is real and I know the man upstairs wants me to change my major to Spanish Translation. Any comments or thoughts would be appreciated!!

Hum Dee Dummmm

So today. Today was a fabulous day. I don't really know why. Nothing amazing happened. What can i say? I guess it was just a good day. It might have to do with me turning in my Astronomy stuff and the teacher wasn't the wiser that i haven't been to his class in the past like 3 weeks...i mean HONESTLY. If the class lecture, ALL that was said is on the Internet and you can just read it...instead of listen to the teacher read it off the power point...is there REALLY any other purpose of going to class? I believe not!! Some classes, for example Chemistry....which will most likely be the death of me...you need to go to class because even though the power points are on the Internet, it's pretty much impossible to understand them if you don't know what they are about or how to interpret them. So that's my feelings on that. Kelly, my wonderful cousin, was in Provo today, and took me out to lunch to Los Hermanos. It was nice to hang out with her. Good times.
So vent time. Work. Work is fine i suppose, but you know it's really starting to get on my nerves with how tight they are trying to make things. When you try to hold a small child down, usually they struggle more. Anything you try to hold down, it seems they just get worse. I know there has to be limitations, but for real I'm sick of them treating us like babies. It really irritates me that they get mad at us for not knowing EVERYTHING and especially when we don't always get all the info they say we are supposed to. It's ridiculous. I don't' understand it. I know i work for a stellar company...we had our company x-mas party last night. It was awesome...good entertainment, portable DVD player, 2 week pay bonus...etc. it's great! it really is! The thing is, one reason why they treat call center people so well sometimes....well I'm pretty sure it's because they know how bad our job sucks. I HATE up selling..i really do, and i do it because i know i need to. If anyone is going to tell me that up selling helps a distributor, you know i just can't believe that. I know for a fact a lot of people really do get suckered into buying our products. The products are good....this is true...but really expensive and most people that are buying just what they need DO NOT WANT something else they CAN'T afford. I love my job. I really do. I just wish we would have more credit than once a year!
Next semester I'm working 7-12 (noon) and going to school in the afternoon. We'll see how that goes.
All for now.

Holy Chem-i_freaking_stry Sucks!

You Know. I know you do, because we all do. It's been a year since i've posted anything, AND on top of that, i've only EVER posted ONE thing. I'm not going to take the time to go through my life in the past year, since really nothing has changed. I still live in P-town with the same guys, but we live in a house now. Mike Bready moved in, so that's cool. I do have a major now in my BYU Schooling experience....since i really am getting schooled....my major is PDBio (Physiology and Developmental Biology for those of the not knowing lingo type)...which basically consists of the study of the human body....which by the way is A--MAZING. The only thing that sucks, and you should be able to tell from the title, is the fact i have to take a BUTT load, yeah a WHOLE BUTT load of Chemistry to do it.

Well at the moment i think i'm pretty much giving up on Chemistry. I've never failed a class in my life, but i'm pretty sure i'm going to fail it. I've fail THREE out of THREE tests....so i don't know how i will pass it...even if i do, IF...that's a big if.....then i'm not going to have an adequate understanding to advance on to the next one....in all honesty the question i'm asking is this. IS chemistry REALLY that important to anything. Sure it's nice to know how many moles of this when disolved in that make an immensly small amount of a new this...but I DON'T CARE. I just want to be a doctor, or surgeon...something of value to society. I'm sick of my dead end job. It's not really Dead end, but it pretty much is...in that i've tried to advance here and it hasn't worked...EVER...so how am i supposed to advance in anything if i'm failing in everything?

Life just doens't work like that. I dont' understand it. If anyoen can answer to me why life is such a pain sometimes then please, DO tell...i'd really like to know. I know it wasn't a bed of roses for the savior, and i know that following him really is my ONLY option at this point...but AGAIN how can i get out of this RUT that i am stuck it...so deep in seems in doing all the wrong things. Maybe not ALL the wrong things, but probably a good portion of them...of course i know that just making up my mind to change and be better is where it all starts, bu in all honesty how can i change without changing....that may not make sense, but it does in my mind.

Well i think this is enough ranting for now. I'm going to be writing everyday...or as much as i can. I need this...i feel better after this short venting session. Thank you Internet :)